Anger Pours Forth

Date: Sun, 12 Jul 2015 14:40:49
Re: Please read!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Eleanor Cooney

On Sun, Jul 12, 2015 at 1:49 PM, Eleanor Cooney wrote:

{{ That’s a marvelous piece. Zelda and the bracelet are a real grace note. }}

Yes, my life is a living O’Henry tale…with a little Alfred E. Neuman
tossed into the mix.

{{ What is making you go blind??? }}

Old age and lack of medical care. Uncle Sam is a bastard, and I will
have my revenge. Soon. Very soon.

– Zeke

Date: Sun, 12 Jul 2015 15:21:51
Re: Please read!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Eleanor Cooney

On Sun, Jul 12, 2015 at 3:14 PM, Eleanor Cooney wrote:

{{ Right, but what I mean is aside from age do you have some progressive eye disease, like cataracts or glaucoma?? }}

In my emails I sometimes mentioned how I had to get surgery for a
probably-detaching retina. I also have cataracts, and the ones in my
left eye are starting to impair my vision. My mother came down with
macular degeneration around my age…so that’s another thing.

– Zeke

Date: Sun, 12 Jul 2015 16:01:21
Re: Please read!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Eleanor Cooney

On Sun, Jul 12, 2015 at 3:27 PM, Eleanor Cooney wrote:

{{ So in other words, medically treatable but for this crappy evil system… }}

Of course. I just heard on NPR this morning, of elderly and poor in
Florida who are not eligible for any medical care, not even Medicaid.
But what got me, is the black lady interviewed is too sweet natured,
not the least bit angry about it. SHE SHOULD BE ENRAGED! I know I am.
She’s just waiting to be with Jebus.

But I’m completely in control. And I shall /never/ need a doctor or
any sort of health care ever again. My eyes will heal all on their
own, and so on through my entire body /and/ mind. I’m just milking
this present (and temporary) situation for all it’s worth…as an

So, not to worry, Morticia. Larkin has my back. My Guardian Dragon of
Great Beauty. My homeless friends keep telling me I’m gonna be
perfectly fine, nothing to worry about. Exactly what I’ve been telling
them for /years/. Now all the love is coming back to me in spades. In
fact, I just told my newest street pal, Gregory, who was worried about
his AIDS treatment:

“Know what the real killer is, Greg?”

“No, what is the real killer?” he replied.


He just smiled and smiled all day, after that.

Oh, yeah, I got Larkin kicked out of a bar two nights ago, through
clever skulduggery. It was hilarious. Must get around to putting this
on “paper” soon.

– Zeke

PS: My “revenge” towards our gov’t has nothing to do with violence, I
assure you. And everything to do with online data manipulation. I have
an army of brilliant hackers setting things up right now. All my email
communique is totally secure from prying eyes (including our exchanges), thanks to these uber-smart allies.


Date: Mon, 13 Jul 2015 15:05:10
The Anger Pours Forth!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Eleanor Cooney

Daily Kos’s optimistic article about how Obamacare is wildly
successful has triggered a small avalanche of outrage. Search for
“krahlin” and you’ll find my own comments interspersed among other
outraged posters.

On another note: I found my missing booty bracelet! It was tucked away in a bottom drawer of Desk #1. God only knows why. Must’ve been a tad

– Zeke

Date: Tue, 14 Jul 2015 11:22:51
Good News!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Eleanor Cooney


Listening to Bernie Sanders’ speech on the radio yesterday, he declared that many people who are insured must pay high fees which they cannot afford. So he /knows/ my situation, and that of many others on Medicaid. I am most impressed. Maybe he read my message of outrage that I posted to his Facebook wall.


On another note: I think that my intentional typos in the final
paragraphs of “Booty”–that emphasized my increasing sight
impairment–are directly inspired by that incredible sci-fi short
story, “Flowers for Algernon.” A synopsis of which you may read here:

Date: Tue, 14 Jul 2015 12:12:26
These two articles affirm my claim of ACA hurting the poor.
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Sean Harrison

Millions Are Now Realizing They’re Too Poor For Obamacare

Bernie Sanders: Obamacare is a good Republican program

Date: Tue, 14 Jul 2015 14:16:58
Re: Errata
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Eleanor Cooney

On Tue, Jul 14, 2015 at 1:30 PM, Eleanor Cooney wrote:

{{ Ah, yes. I know that story well. So you’ll go fully blind, then slowly get your vision back. }}

OMG no, not that extreme! That piece was, in part, a memoriam to
“Flowers for Algernon,” and nothing more. (Interesting though that
only in hindsight did I realize this.) No way do I plan to take it any

– Zeke

Date: Tue, 14 Jul 2015 14:23:11
Re: Errata
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Eleanor Cooney

On Tue, Jul 14, 2015 at 2:19 PM, Eleanor Cooney wrote:

{{ Kidding, kidding. }}

Funnier than a barrel of monkeys on Adderall with vibrating dildos.

– Zeke

Date: Fri, 17 Jul 2015 10:43:02
I’m gonna rock the world soon!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Carlyle Lambourne

Ally Carlyle:

Please read my latest blog entry entitled “Birthday Magic 1.” Scheduled to be released to the public on the morrow.

Two reasons I beg this request, are because of the miraculous happenings in my life that have recently taken over; hardly anyone else shares my enthusiastic revelations. Plus:

In the event that my whistle blowing activism may land me in prison–or even have me disappeared by gov’t intrigue–I need at least /three/ witnesses towards my courageous demise. But I’m sitting pretty, for I have 17, including yourself: Larkin Kelsey (of course), Eleanor Cooney (from Mendocino), John Havrilchak (from Philadelphia), Laundromat Lady Zelda (around the corner from my hovel), Barbara (employee at CVS Pharmacy just a half block away), my brother Vincent Catalano Jr. (from Massapequa, Long Island), Sally Leiser (mother of a homeless man, Mike; she lives somewhere in Michigan) my illustrator Sidni Rohan (from Levittown, PA) and my street pals Kurt, Mikey, Hollywood, Gregory, Darrin, Zach, Cameron, and Jerry. They will each receive a letter similar to the one I am now posting to you.

I will of course keep Larkin informed of my situation as best I can. By snail-mailing him a copy of this email to you, for one. He is both my protector and saviour.

So I should be going into hiding soon, via the blueprint laid out by my army: The Blue Rose Militia. Contact with you and all other allies will be established through super-secure routes.

I am so greatly loved these days, I cannot be anything but tremendously assured that /many/ brave and lovely men have my back. If I am delusional in all this, so be it. But who on earth can oppose such a marvelous destiny, when revealed this amazing outcome whether by fantasy or real-life drama?

– Zeke


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