Hip-Hopping My Way To Nirvana

[Brindlekin Tales – Book 7: Chapter 25]

Subject: My second query to the American Bar Association’s “free question” site:
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 3, 2023 at 1:10 AM

Just posted it moments ago.


This is a personal injury lawsuit requesting over a $25,000 settlement. Though I’m Judgment Proof, I decided to reply with a General Denial, because the numerous Complaints were either outrageous or false. There are two defendants in this case, myself and my landlord. So I’m now wondering, since Plaintiff’s Attorney will drop me from the case because I’m Judgment Proof, will my landlord’s attorney have access to my list of Denials via the Plaintiff’s Attorney? (On the day he received my General Denial, he contacted me via phone and asked me to email him back with a list of those complaints I am denying, with an explanation for each one.)

Or should I make the Landlord’s Attorney aware of my denials, and offer to send him a copy…if doing so is legal? I’m sure my denials will aid the other defendant considerably. But since I don’t know how the legal system works in this matter, I’m not sure if my list of denials is required by Plaintiff’s Attorney to show to the Defendant’s Attorney. Or if not, is there some other way for Defendant’s Attorney to see them through lawful means?

The Case Management Conference is scheduled for August 23, which I presume I won’t be asked to attend, though of course the other defendant will, and I’d like them to be strengthened with my denials at hand, if at all possible.


Re: Marshall’s narration of Shadow Box (part 1) ready for download!
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 3, 2023 at 1:40 PM

> Excellent! I love hearing him read my stuff. He totally “gets” it!

Yes, it’s a real pleasure and a great honor to have him read one’s prosaic output. A special treat is when he interjects this or that side comment, ya never know WHEN (or even if) he’ll do it, but it’s always a prize when he does!

I presume you’ve downloaded the two audio files, so will now remove them from my Mega cloud and gay-bible services. Rest assured, though, they’ll remain on Google Drive for time immemorial, as well as my main drive and backed up to external media.

– Zeke K-Holmes

Subject: Deek’s last three visits: stupendous!
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 3, 2023 at 9:29 PM

11:30 PM Monday night, briefer than brief, just a passing by. A soft “Yo!” summoned me from my work station to peer out the window.

“Am I due any allowance yet, or do I gotta wait till the third?” he queried, as the doggies gazed up at me with loving regard, eyes glinting gold under the street lamp and curly tails a-waggin’.

“The third,” I replied. “In two days.”

“Okay, thanks,” he answered, then said, “You don’t have to come down, I’ll be on my way now.”

Of course I so badly yearned to rush downstairs and hug the pups, but I just nodded and watched them depart. Lucky & Flaco glanced back at me a few times in sweet regret before they all disappeared into the fog. All I could give in return were smiles…that had to suffice. I then withdrew my head from the window and returned to my desk to wrap up another good day’s work. I hit the sack moments later, knowing full WELL how things will soon turn out: beyond any and ALL expectations. And off to Slumberland I sailed, on Psyche’s wings!

[SIDEBAR: In fact, My Dear Wattson, I strongly SENSE the near future barreling down upon THIS most grateful pilgrim: a premonition, an awesome SHIVER humming deep within my core and rippling through my very bones, as I anticipate the approaching juggernaut of overwhelming good fortune. Of such an immeasurable boon that NO ONE ON EARTH has ever been so blessed in all our troubled history thus far (except in mythology, of course, including the religious kind). And I don’t even take DRUGS to feel this way, good doctor! Not since Pterry Pterodactyl first appeared YEARS AGO to breathe fresh life into this soul a-tremble with ungodly cravings. Which turned out to be my LAST without so much as a single SURGE of withdrawal pangs. I call it “my 100% solution!” EVERYone should have a friendly, Late Jurassic proto-bird in their life…and so it shall be, if “moi” has anything to do with it! Graaack!]

Now we come to Deek’s second meetup, late in the day of Tiwes…shortly after Svalinn raised her shield to Sol’s luminescence and plunged this side of the world into night’s dark abyss:

Soon as I stepped out, Flaco & Lucky ran up to me in happy greets, for which I dropped onto the sidewalk and embraced them both. Lucky was especially silly, as he not only flopped on his back to squirm for joy, but pushed his front paws against my hip and wriggled a semicircle around my lower back till he reached the other side! Whereupon I turned my torso in his direction to pick him up and place him onto my lap so I could scritch his belly!

Of course his sister wanted in on the act and demanded my attention by plopping herself half-atop Lucky while pressing hard against my thigh. Deek smiled to witness the canine camaraderie, said he was glad to bring them here tonight, since he knows how much I miss having them visit me upstairs. Then he told me to watch them while he runs off to purchase some cheap grub from the Chevron station.

While he was gone I grabbed two sheets of cardboard by the trash bin and laid them down for the pooches. (It was a bit later when I brought down their sleeping bag, after their master returned.) Our Viking friend Heimdall showed up, too…for most of Deek’s visit, in fact, which lasted a tad over two hours. He was good company as usual, a tempering force that serves to quell my Cajun sidekick’s penchant for hissy fits. He offered us a celebratory shot of butterscotch schnapps, but we both turned him down.

“Thank you for the kind offer,” I replied. “But me and alcohol don’t mix well, it burns a hole in my stomach and makes me feel like crap.”

He took no offense and continued his amiable badinage with Deek, while also greeting the dogs who enjoy his company, but preferred to remain snug in their sleeping bag, for it was a bit chill last night. Heimdall stepped aside for awhile to diddle with his own Bluetooth speaker, which allowed me some conversational time with Deek. First thing he brought up was money (natch):

“My good speaker was stolen, and one of my people offered me a great deal,” he murmured in a mellow stupor (whether from meth, ganja or lack of sleep I know not). “So I’m asking if you could part with three hunner dollah tomorrow, soon as the bank opens. The speaker’s value is five hunner.”

If I told you I was shocked, Wattson, I’d be lying:

“I guess I can do that,” I said after mulling it over for a few seconds. “Your entire month’s allowance for May comes to $320, so I’ll just give you the whole enchilada. I see no point in holding on to twenty dollars for later dispersal. What good would THAT do?”

My reasoning behind this was: he seems to spend ALL his allowance on electronic crap anyway, and allotting him an entire month’s stipend in one lump sum would do away with his brainless accusations that I failed to pay him his final eighty dollars come week 4. Besides which: his tiny cabin setup includes two meals per day, plus a hundred dollars monthly. And on top of that he sells weed and meth on the streets, plus scavenges for bottles and cans which bring in even MORE moolah. So he’s sitting pretty with all those things going for him!

“I swear, I won’t bother you about money for the rest of the month!” he reassured me, though that remains to be seen, doesn’t it, old chap?

“I hope not, Deek” I retorted. “But even if you do I guarantee on a stack of bibles it won’t get you anywhere.”

He then moved on to the next topic of his choice:

“All the dealers in the Tenderloin are laying low these days, the Coast Guard is on the streets hunting ’em down!

“It’s not the Coast Guard, Deek,” I explained, “It’s the CHP and the National Guard. But they’re not AFTER the users, or even small-time dealers. They’re gunning for the big shots who are mostly responsible for this epidemic of deaths from fentanyl-laced everything. But it’s not even boots on the ground, they’re operating behind the scenes, gathering evidence before each arrest. They’re not interested in turning the Tenderloin into a war zone.”

“Uh-uh,” he disagreed with a shake of the head, “they’re patrolling the streets, like some kinda foreign invasion!”

At any rate, Wattson, it turned out Deek is all FOR ending this fentanyl tragedy…he’s ALWAYS shunned it, and avoids anyone he knows who uses that drug, like the plague. So he’s on the side of the law in this matter, and I am most PLEASED to hear that straight from the horse’s mouth!

And now we get to his third, and final, topic for that night:

“Lucky dumped a humongous turd this morning, fat and REALLY long!”

“What on earth did you FEED him?” was my initial reaction.

“Nothing out of the ordinary,” he shrugged.

“If either one of ’em has to poop late at night, do you get up and take them for a walk?” I further queried.

“Yeah, I do, but for some reason they don’t relieve themselves,” he explained. “It’s like they’re still holding it in, even though they’re not indoors.”

“Well, they always pooped for me, never a problem,” I replied, not knowing what else to say.

Before My Humble Trio departed, I said: “See ya tomorrow morning, but please don’t show up earlier than nine if at all possible.”

“I’ll try,” was all he said before pushing his cart homewards…or at least, in that direction for part of the way.

Now, last but not least, this morning’s meetup:

I made sure to get to the Chase branch shortly after 8 AM, in hopes of avoiding Deek calling up to my window before I got that done first. There was a slight drizzle in the air, which I think went on all night. Not bad if you don’t stand in one place too long, but it DID call for a raincoat.

I didn’t take the usual route, which is to turn left up Noe Street, then a sharp right down the first side street. Instead, I walked straight up Market Street for one long block, then turned left and crossed Fifteenth, where the bank was situated right on the opposite corner. Here’s a screenshot taken off a Google map in case you’re curious, seeing as it WILL become a protected shrine some day, thanks to it being one of the places frequented by the founder of The First Church of Dog:

Click here for a larger view.

Once the ATM spit out fifteen Jacksons and I inserted them into a Chase envelope and dropped THAT into my backpack, I decided to return by the usual route: up 15th Street to Noe. Upon reaching Noe Street I crossed it to continue down the opposite side, for quicker access into Rosenberg’s two short blocks down. Pleased with the thought that I could POSSIBLY enjoy my java and blueberry muffin beFORE the cash-grubbing Cajun trickster showed up, I was just about to enter the shop when I heard his voice call out: “Yo!”

I turned about to see him standing right across the street in a sheltered nook, with the two mutts and a dolly instead of his usual cart. Apparently he had left his cabin early, or stayed out all night, and was parked there waiting for 9 AM to arrive. But I had to go and fuck it up by taking the Noe Street route.

“Where did YOU come from?” he queried as I drew near. “Taking an early morning stroll?”

I held my hands out and said: “Where do you THINK I came from?”

He seemed genuinely confused, so I confessed: “From the bank, of course!”

Soon as I stood close to him, the pups arose from their cozy little spot to greet me with the profound respect they show to any human who truly loves them. I crouched down to hug and pet them for a bit, noticing Flaco’s slight shiver from the damp cold…while their master remained silent. At least they both were dry.

Once I stood back up I asked him: “Well, do you want your money now, or would you rather wait until the rain dies out, like maybe this afternoon or tomorrow?”

“No, I’ll take it now,” he replied. And with that I removed my backpack to extract the Chase envelope and hand it to him.

“I couldn’t get you that extra twenty,” I explained, “because I forgot you can’t withdraw more than $300 from an ATM on any given day.”

He was disappointed upon hearing that: “Damn, I was planning to get some coffee and a snack with that!”

“Sorry, no can do,” I replied. For I only had five dollars in my OWN pocket, and two Washingtons back hovel.

“Nice raincoat,” he then said. “Where’d you get it?”

“From your friend Deek, but you should know that already,” I declared, “because you were there when I thanked him for it.” (Please note, dear reader, in case you forgot: Deek has a friend by the same name. Thank Glob my Brindlekin Tales ain’t a Russian novel!)

“No I wasn’t,” he pointlessly objected.

“Yes you were,” I rebutted. “This was in early December I think. You were seated on your bike with one foot on the ground, blabbing away with him when I showed up and thanked him for the raincoat he gave me a few days earlier. You seemed perturbed then, too, as if anything that happens in this burg should go by YOU first. The world doesn’t work that way, Deek!”

He didn’t respond further, so I changed the subject: “Sure was nice to see Heimar again!”

He then mumbled something I couldn’t comprehend, while preparing to depart. As he grabbed the dolly to go, a heavy speaker the size of a bread box enclosed in a zippered cloth case suddenly slipped from atop the small pile of other sundry items loosely secured by a single bungee cord. It fell with a hard “thump” to the sidewalk.

“Fuck!” is all he said while balancing it back in place. “I’m going to the Chevron station now.”

“Well okay and god bless,” I replied, and just stood there for a few moments, watching them take off as he pushed the dolly along while keeping a firm hand on the speaker. I then crossed the street and entered Rosenberg’s.

So that’s it for now, good physician. Just wanna share some final thoughts born of that enigmatic deity of hindsight, who should rightfully have a place on Mt. Olympus…and not just because his twin deity called “afterthought” says so:

Funny how I talked about dancing in the streets once a troubadour with some musical instrument or a boombox shows up. For minutes after posting that, it struck me: THAT’S DEEK, HE’S ALREADY A TROUBADOUR! Also funny I’ve been downloading rap and hip-hop videos recently, ’cause Deek’s influence sparked in my heart a love for that genre. When all the while I ALREADY HAVE THIS STUPENDOUS COLLECTION STORED ON MY LAPTOP (backed up on external media to boot), thanks to my acquiring them for Deek over the years! 7,161 SONGS TOTAL AT THIS POINT…A VERITABLE CORNUCOPIA! So I’m good to go, Wattson…soon as he blasts one of those songs in front of Hotel California North, that makes me wanna boogie down! Conclusion:

Again, a SETUP by my bodhisattva guardians who know my future so well, including what is to come down the pike a VERY short time from now! And Deek KNOWS this!

– Zeke K-Holmes

P.S.: ALSO funny how, with the first lawsuit I am AGAINST the landlord, but with the second I am very much PRO. Ezekiel through the Looking Glass…with a magician’s pinch of smoke and mirrors to spice things up. Oh those wascally wabbit bodhisattva guardians!


Here comes the God of Hindsight to whisper in my ear once again (or is that YOU, Pterry Pterodactyl):

If Deek were not lying about needing $300 for a new speaker, then why did he take off to Chevron to purchase coffee and a snack? After all, wasn’t that sum the exact price required to gain his prize? Oh well, it doesn’t really matter. NOTHING matters except Lucky & Flaco’s health and happiness! Keeping my eye on the REAL prize.

Click here for a larger view.

Subject: Something I forgot to mention about last night’s meetup!
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 4, 2023 at 10:25 PM

Deek and Heimar were talking about his tiny cabin arrangement, which I only gathered when I clearly heard him say:

“I told them to get me a room at the Donnelly Hotel, it’s a really NICE place!”

And it’s true, Wattson, these hotels converted for the houseless are set up with respect and consideration for these unfortunate folks. Not just clean and friendly, but they’re provided with three hot meals a day, regular wellness checks if needed, good security and a warm, welcoming place to call home! If you haven’t seen the article I posted to the MCN lists yesterday, on just this matter, here’s the URL again, but it’s the VIDEO that goes with it, you must see (9.5 minutes).

Also, here’s a superb video about San Francisco’s navigation centers (5.5 minutes).

In sum:

So GLAD to see Deek pushing for a stable home life! It will certainly bring much joy to the pups, as I’m sure they’re already ecstatic to call that tiny cabin their new digs.

– Zeke K-Holmes

Subject: Disappointing reply from the ABA’s “free legal answers” service!
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 4, 2023 at 11:24 AM


From the Administrator

May 4 at 11:55 AM CDT


Unfortunately our volunteers can currently only help with disaster-related legal questions at the moment. You previously asked a question that was picked up by a volunteer before it could be administratively withdrawn. The answer was allowed to be posted in light of your approaching deadline and housing concerns.

There may be other places for help. Please see the additional resources below.

To search for (free) legal aid providers in your county:

Law Help CA

To find a Lawyer Referral Service in your County, to get a regular paid attorney [if your income is low, possibly a low-fee attorney]:

LRS by County

San Francisco Law Library’s legal reference librarians are available to help you find resources and information that may help you represent yourself.

San Francisco Public Law Library. The library is open Monday–Friday from 9am–5pm.

The ACCESS (Assisting Court Customers with Education and Self-help Services) Center can give you legal information and/or referrals to other resources to help you represent yourself.


While I am sorry we cannot directly assist, I hope some of the resources, and other resources provided previously, may help.


The main problem I have with their reply is they don’t clearly STATE on their “free question” page that they only handle disaster related cases at this time. In fact, all the drop-down options seem to indicate they ONLY deal with COVID or fire issues. Though I presumed this was simply a matter of sloppy presentation, since the ABA is supposed to assist ALL low income people! Three other issues I have with their reply:

1) Paid attorney? Even on a sliding scale the fees are still astronomical, relative to my incone. What a wad of crap!

2) San Francisco Law Library? Impossible to get the answers I need, no matter how many legal tomes they throw at me!

3) The ACCESS Center has a live chat and a live helpline to answer your queries. But they do not include Personal Injury cases on their list of things they can help you with. They ALSO have an “Intake Inquiry Form” online, which I’ve already tried (regarding best way to respond to a Personal Injury Summons when I’m Judgment Proof), but they never got back to me! Just for the heck of it I’ll try again, with the same question I just posed to the ABA. A simple matter of copy/paste…there, ’tis done! Not that I expect any reply from them THIS time around, either.

– Zeke K-Holmes


“Law grinds the poor, and rich men rule the law.” – Oliver Goldsmith

Re: Disappointing reply from the ABA’s “free legal answers” service!
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 4, 2023 at 10:05 PM

> VERY disappointing. Same old crap!

HUGE holes in their outreach to the poor, like Swiss cheese when the holes occupy more space than the cheese itself. Assuming I’m very soon gonna rocket to fame, all this dirty laundry will hang out to dry for the entire world to see, via my WordPress blog. If the SF Bar were smart, they’d hustle their asses PRONTO to rectify this before that happens. And it’s possible they will, once my eviction attorney checks out my LARC story, wherein I bring that up! She could spread the word by sharing my letter of gratitude with others in various legal organizations…which includes the link to my LARC chapter. So:

The American Bar Association’s latest (and final) reply pretty much said their assisting me with my first question was a MISTAKE! This’ll go into my blog tonight. More than one way to skin a cat.

– Zeke K-Holmes

Subject: Announcing the release of my “Eviction Fiasco” chapters!
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: MCN announcement, MCN discussion
Date: May 5, 2023 at 12:23 PM

The following “Eviction Fiasco” chapters number 21 in toto, split between books 5 and 6 of my Brindlekin Tales. I had to put them all on hold until the lawsuit came to an end, which it did on 19 April 2023. All parties involved are pseudonymous except for yours truly. The time span of these “Fiasco” adventures runs from May through September of 2022. They are largely about OTHER aspects of my life, but since somewhere in each piece details of my lawsuit are brought up one way or another, I had to delay their publication…as it is verboten to discuss or make public any particulars of one’s case until it has come to a close. Some chapters beyond the “Fiasco” collection DO bring up the lawsuit, but not in any detail.

To read these chapters, just go to my WordPress “Brindlekin Tales” page here.

Once that page is loaded, search for “fiasco” and it will take you to that section immediately. Enjoy the true adventure!

– Ezekiel J. Krahlin, auteur extraordinaire

Subject: Another thing I forgot to mention about Tuesday night’s meetup…
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 5, 2023 at 1:01 PM

…something I revealed to Deek soon as he parked his sorry ass on the sidewalk. That I LOVE rap and hip-hop music now, after being exposed to it all these years!

“Really good stuff,” I added. “TONS of it! It’s got heart, it’s got soul, it’s got rhythm, it spits in the face of corruption and evil! Who WOULDn’t wanna dance to that?”

“What?” he replied. “No one develops a taste for something overnight!”

“Of course not!” I retorted. “Didn’t you just hear me say AFTER being exposed to it for years? And just WHO do you think is responsible for that? I’ll give you three guesses.”

“Oh, so it finally grabbed you?” he queried like a doubting Thomas. “And just when did THAT happen?”

“The white man’s wax fell outta my ears about a week ago!” I confessed. “Now I LOVE rap, I LOVE hip-hop, and I have a HUGE collection of music to enjoy, thanks to some crazy Cajun dude who lived on the streets for YEARS with two of the sweetest little doggies I’ve ever met, but they now have a tiny cabin to call home…only four or five BLOCKS from here!”

Well, Wattson, he didn’t seem the LEAST bit intrigued or excited over this, maybe ’cause he thought I was mocking him. Or perhaps in his own mind he humbly congratulated himself for a job well done.

– Zeke K-Holmes

P.S.: Today’s May 5th, when Magdalena Elvensborn returns from vacation and will soon read my letter of appreciation. What better reason to celebrate Cinco de Mayo than THAT? Then there’s Marshall’s “Memo of the Weird” going live tonight. Just another day in paradise for THIS jaded-hippie-queer pilgrim!

Subject: “What a big font you have!”
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 5, 2023 at 2:30 PM

Said my Little Red Riding Hood to Kevin’s wolf…see pic 1:

Click here for a larger view.

Why such a large font, anyway…is this his attempt to yell at me? At any rate I texted him…see pic 2:

He hasn’t texted back yet. Now get THIS, Wattson:

Barely a minute after I found his letter dropped by the foot of my door, I received this less-than-helpful reply from ACCESS:


Dear Ezekiel Krahlin,

Thank you for your inquiry. The ACCESS Center is a self-help center that assist self-represented litigants with forms completion and answer procedural questions on case types that are within the menu of our services, see our flyer for the list of services and hours of operation.

Your inquiry regarding the personal injury lawsuit, a general civil case, referenced in your inquiry are beyond the scope of the self-help menu of services. Please contact the (BASF) Bar Association of San Francisco’s Lawyer Referral Service at (415) 989-1616 to hire an attorney, and/or to see if you qualify for a low fee or free attorney.


IDIOTS, the lot of ’em! How do they get to work, in a clown car?

– Zeke K-Holmes


I’ve been putting a dog or cat sticker on my rent payment envelope for years, Wattson! But when I resumed payment (slipping the envelope under the manager’s door) I thought to myself: “Hmm, in the context of this eviction brouhaha, my continuing to attach a doggy sticker may prove to be a vexing thorn in his side!” For which conclusion I decided to keep it up.

BTW April’s check never showed up in my account records as having been deposited. Why didn’t he return it to me, instead of waiting for May’s payment to do that? The only reason I can come up with, is: he’s just addle brained. Those clinging to life with their final breath often are.

Subject: Another email to my eviction attorney!
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 5, 2023 at 5:32 PM

Since she’s not in her office Fridays, I used Gmail’s schedule option to have it posted on Monday, 9:30 AM.


Subject: Building manager refused my rent payment!

This happened on Friday, May 5th. He (or more likely an assistant, due to his feeble condition) left this message by my door, with my check for this month’s rent:

[Google drive link to the letter Kevin dropped at my door, though a different pic showing it right on the hallway floor, exactly how he left it: an open envelope with the check sticking out and the letter visible for anyone to read. So maybe THAT’S why he used such a large font, what a stinker! And whoever delivered it definitely read it. See attachment, Wattson.]

Regardless, the letter was not sealed, so anyone walking by could easily read it, especially with such a large font…and the check was right there for anyone to pick up and read as well, thus revealing what a low amount I pay.

So I texted him:

[Google drive link to a screenshot of the text in question, Wattson.]

Don’t know why he didn’t do that for April’s check, which has yet to show up on my bank account records as having been deposited in Ablahblah’s name.

Now, I have this question, which is NOT a Civil Suit query per se, but a general one about what to expect from a General Denial regarding the other defendant, my Landlord. But because it DOES have to do with my civil suit, I’ll understand if you cannot answer my question…and I’ll march on down to LARC’s next walk-in. Because they’re the only option I have left. Both the ABA and ACCESS (via their online question page) refuse to give me an answer because it’s a Civil matter (well, the ABA claims they only deal with disaster related issues these days, though they don’t make that clear on their website). Legal Assistance for the Elderly likewise doesn’t deal with Civil issues. Nor do legal services for the disabled. And the SF Law Library does NOT have any material related to my situation that I can find…nor can the librarians there either. Anyway, here’s my question:

[Exact same query I posted to the ABA and ACCESS, Wattson.]

Thanks once again, Magdalena!



Re: Another email to my eviction attorney!
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 5, 2023 at 5:32 PM

> Utterly bizarre. Doubt he’d be refusing it on his own; he’s being directed. But no such notification for the April check, eh?

My Bodhisattva Premise:

A bit more ribbing, a bit more having fun at my expense…and gifting me with even MORE delightful tales to compose…cliffhangers abound! I am very pleased–no, ECSTATIC–at how effortlessly I’m churning out these literary bon mots in response.

And no, my April check (which I slipped under Kevin’s door on the 25th) has failed to show up in my bank account, as having been deposited by Ablahblah Realty. But I’m sure Magdalena will peremptorily straighten out the rent payment issue with their attorney, come Monday or Tuesday, hell or high water. Especially in light of the malicious way Kevin had his letter delivered.

– Zeke K-Holmes

P.S.: It was a three-hour trial of tedium getting all my “Eviction Fiasco” chapters posted to my blog. Because I had to edit the title, book number and chapter number for each and every one of those 21 chapters. Then download ’em individually for backup to my main drive, then insert their titles and links one by one into my Brindlekin Tales table of contents. WHEW! What a relief and a thrill to finally get it done! For they’ve been lingering in my WordPress trash folder for so many months, jonesing to be let outta the gate since day one, with a click of the “restore” button.


Changed the date of my email delivery. By one day, plus a later time: 11:30 AM. I don’t want it crashing up against that wonderful missive about my “LARC’apade.” ‘Cause even though posted last week, she just returned from vacation today, so won’t read it till Monday…along with the rent check issue, had I not rescheduled its delivery.


I decided it’s best to drop my question about the General Denial and focus on my rent check debacle. I’ll just attend another LARC congregation. After all, birds of a feather DO flock together! (Pterry Pterodactyl gave me that pun, BTW.)

Memo of the Weird soon to broadcast another Friday night delight!

Subject: Repercussion of my General Denial, perhaps?
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 6, 2023 at 1:06 AM

Which might explain Kevin’s foolhardy rejection of my rent check, and the way he did it. FYI he has NOT texted me back, and it’s been well over six HOURS!

Could Plaintiff’s Attorney have contacted Kevin regarding the rabies vaccination? And asked him: “Did you receive the proof Mr. Krahlin claimed to have texted you? And if so, did you neglect to inform the Plaintiff due to the distraction of your illness, or possibly (god forbid) malicious intent?”

Or did Plaintiff’s Attorney drop the lawsuit, pissing off his client who informed Kevin about this unexpected turn of events? Because the Plaintiff ACTED upon Kevin’s “sage” counsel…to proceed with a lawsuit, and which complaints to fabricate?

So now, if they proceed with a lawsuit, Plaintiff AND Attorney (AND Kevin) might wind up being charged with perjury on numerous counts, thanks to my General Denial and accompanying list of rebuttals?

Oh, divine conjecture! Like a sweet, plump, frozen dark-red cherry thawing out upon my tongue on a sultry summer day! Gawd, I miss those cherries…I need to hustle my ass down to Trader Joe’s! The good Amazon giveth and the good Amazon taketh away.

[Oh, wow, Marshall just started reading part 2 of Shadow Box! 12:49 AM.]

– Zeke K-Holmes

Subject: Deek was right re. “boots on the ground” in the Tenderloin!
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 6, 2023 at 12:26 PM

So City Hall deceived us! Again. See this article:

Military-Style Drug War in Tenderloin Sparks Fears That More Drug Users Could Overdose

Re: Deek was right re. “boots on the ground” in the Tenderloin!
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 6, 2023 at 3:12 PM

> Reminiscent of the Cossacks riding into the shtetls and laying waste.

A government is only as good as its people. So what OTHER outcome should one expect? So many democrats and progressives still harbor fascist attitudes in some aspects. Look at how all these self-proclaimed “democratic” queers have been treating ME…referring to this homeless dog issue specifically, but also many OTHER incidents throughout my life here in San Franshitsco! So much hostility towards the homeless, and those who advocate FOR them, as I do.

> Remember when we were kids and the post-war future looked so bright you practically had to wear shades? Little did we dream that within our lifetimes we’d become technologically space-age and socially Dark Age.

“Disneyfied brainwashing,” I calls it. Though maybe better stated as “corporatized.”

Medieval superstition has lumbered on into modern times like an albatross around civilization’s neck. The Catholic and Muslim muckymucks are mostly responsible for this travesty. With capitalism a close second…which likewise arose from religion, that is: Calvinism and the Protestant work ethic. (Not to be confused with the comic strip character Calvin, whose stuffed tiger compatriot, Hobbes, instilled a rebellious spirit in the young fellow…much like his philosopher namesake did for society.)

> Feudalism, ever lurking in the shadows, always ready to rear its ugly head again.

They’ll soon have moi to contend with…and with the stalwart support of Pterry Pterodactyl and his army of leather-winged minions–plus my Mighty Mouse Virus (from which Pterry is an AI nanocloud spinoff)–I will be gloriously invincible.

So I’m not worried. Much. Graaack!

– Zeke K-Holmes

Subject: Today’s meetup: SPECTACULAR!
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 6, 2023 at 8:17 PM

[SIDEBAR: Listening to an album by rap artist Key Glock as I type this missive. Here’s the song playing right now: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xs4JfuTbsio


Ayy, you know I got the juicemane
I just hopped up out that Lambo Batmobile like Bruce Wayne
I just dropped two hundred on my gang, that shit was pocket change
And three hundred for my chain, that’s a Bentley Mulsanne
(Skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt)
Anything, switchin’ lanes (Yuh)
Diamonds on my neck and wrist fighting, MMA (Yuh)
(Diamonds on my neck and wrist fighting, MMA)
Yuh, young nigga balling, balling, balling, NBA

Not like I’m gonna MEMORIZE the shit, but there ya go, Wattson! I have no idea what juicemane (pronounced “joos-mayn”) means, unless it’s a variation on “juiceman,” which the Urban Dictionary defines as:

“An individual who is extremely jacked and attends college. He majors in juicemanology, and minors in weight lifting, alcohol, and girls. He does pull-ups for days at a time without even needing water or food — just protein. He has no respect for anyone or anything, and has probably dabbled with steroids.”

Be that as it may:]

This afternoon’s meetup was the best one ever, thus far! Deek was eager to show off his new speaker:

“I just wanna prove to you I’m not jivin’ when I say what I need the money for. Check out the dials on this bitch!”

When he said that, I was crouched down to hug and scritch the pups, so was a bit annoyed I’d have to disengage for a minute in order to stand up and appease their master. He showed me a 3-foot-tall speaker wrapped in a green trash bag with the top open, and resting in a vertical shopping cart. I’m guessing it weighs 35 to 40 pounds.

“It set me back for jus’ a hunner-fordee dollah ’cause jus’ as good as the one I was gonna get for twice the price! So I also got this granny cart for thirdee, and a new pair-a Nikes,” he eagerly explained while tilting a raised foot back and forth to flaunt his black and red footwear. I imagine the Nikes were right up there with the speaker, money-wise. My heart went “cringe” but my vocal cords did not:

“Nice sneakers,” I replied with faux enthusiasm, only because I saw no good point in damping his joyful spirit.

“Looks like a great system, too,” I added while placing a hand on the speaker to caress the warm black plastic that had an appealing, brushed surface instead of glossy-slick. Its corners were not sharp but rounded, which I also favored.

He then rattled on about the battery life and how the salesperson tried to talk him into buying another speaker for “thirdee dollah” more, claiming it was a better quality overall…but Deek held firm.

“And see this,” he continued with enthusiastic patter. “All the card slots are on top!” And with that, he inserted a new music chip I just gave him per his request when he called up to my window.

Somewhere mixed in our badinage was my declaration that I don’t really care WHAT he spends the money on, so long as it makes him happy…and I trust him anyway. He looked GREAT, Wattson! Neatly dressed in a pair of dark-brown denims and a gray, long-sleeve pullover covered by a white summer shirt dotted with little blue and green patterns that I didn’t bother to make out what, exactly, they depicted. He also wore a heavy-chained, gold necklace with a metallic pendant like an iron cross, though I didn’t pay it any mind either, so it coulda been some OTHER symbol of like shape. Nice, short-clipped haircut, too, though I DO miss that lovely, golden-brown hair when it’s grown out down to his shoulders. It complements his hazel eyes and glints in the sodium haze of the streetlamps. But the most important thing of all is this:

He looks fukkin HEALTHY!

I made a point of telling him he’s RIGHT about what’s goin’ down in the Tenderloin, that it IS “boots on the ground” instead of a surreptitious approach…and that they ARE going for the small-time dealers as well. Which only serves to instill a heightened degree of paranoia for ALL residents in that district! And doesn’t REALLY attack the core of the problem. Know how he responded, Wattson?

“They need to get to the small fry first, ask who their distributor is, and move up from there.”

I didn’t bother to argue the point (how that’s the WRONG way to go, it’s been tried many times before and always fails), seeing as he wouldn’t understand anyway, and his heart IS in the right place regarding the scourge of fentanyl. In short: I’m immeasurably PROUD of My Cajun Devil!

So I fed and sat the mutts while their master went to the public loo by Chevron to shave and wash up and, I guess, purchase some grub. He was back in forty minutes. I heard him from way up the block ’cause his boombox was blasting away. And, of course, so did the dogs who immediately stood up, gazed in that direction with curly tails a-waggin’ prestissimo. I stood up then, to watch him approach and figured:

“Soon as he gets near enough I’ll start to boogie to the rap!

Alas, once he was only several doors distant he stopped to turn off the speaker. Oh, well, another time I suppose…though I’m sure it will be soon, like DAYS soon!

Our conversation today covered various topics. No need to break it all down…sufficient to say our palaver was like old friends who enjoy each other’s company so much they get together several times a week over coffee and hearty laughs. While preparing to take off, someone he knows appeared before him. He was tall, skinny and slightly bent over: an Ichabod Crane type, only with what appeared to be streaks of red lipstick all over his face.

“Hey, what happened to you?” Deek addressed. “Ya got beat up?”

I don’t know what the fellow said in reply, since the traffic din and his mumbly voice made that impossible. But they talked about SOMEthing for a few brief moments, then Deek took off. Since Ichabod was now standing right in front of the entrance to my building, I accompanied Deek to the corner, told him he’s standing too close to the gate, so I’m gonna wait till he leaves. Whereupon he said:

“He’s on tranq…that’s why his face is such a mess!”

Tranq, Wattson: the flesh eating drug, often cut with fentanyl! No wonder Deek walked away so quickly.

As we reached the corner I turned around to see I could now return hovel without obstruction. As I wished him a good day and began to proceed homeward, he called to me:

“That’s Scampy’s boyfriend. Well, one of ’em!”

“Scary!” I declared, then disappeared deep into the maw of Hotel California North, a close cousin of the leviathan that swallowed Jonah.

– Zeke K-Holmes

P.S.: I almost forgot to mention that when Deek started to move on (but before I realized Ichabod had thwarted my entry) I called to him, wished him happy trails and how fantastic he’s doin’ these days. “You’re a leader!” I hollered. He grinned, waved a dismissive hand and said something like “Oh pish!” So I tossed him a second compliment: “You set an example! Bravo!”

P.P.S: I switched back to Monday morning to send my email off to Magdalena, after realizing it’s best she see it ASAP.


Close to the end of our visit I told him I need to shop for groceries at Trader Joe’s because they’re cheaper than around here, or most anywhere else for that matter. So I won’t be home Monday and Tuesday until 2 PM…but I’ll try to bring it down to just one of those days.

“Oh, you don’t have to tell me, I’ll be fine,” he kindly replied.



While we were walking towards the corner he made the most thoughtful remark:

“I know how much you care about the dogs, so I promise I’ll drop by frequently, even when it’s not for money.”

“Yes, Deek, I love them very much, they’re the nicest thing to ever happen to me,” I replied. “But please keep in mind I care about YOU, too! We’re ALL important to each other.”

Subject: ChatGPT gave me the answer when legal counsel did not!
From: Ezekiel Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: May 6, 2023 at 10:55 PM

First, my question:

When there are two defendants in a lawsuit, and one is dismissed because he is judgement proof, but nonetheless filed a general denial because the complaints against him were false and outrageous…will the other defendant’s attorney get to see the dismissed defendant’s list of rebuttals he sent to the plaintiff’s attorney per his request?

Now, ChatGPT’s reply:

I am not a lawyer, but I can provide some general information. In a lawsuit where multiple defendants are involved, each defendant typically has their own attorney representing their interests. The attorney for one defendant generally does not have automatic access to the documents or information provided by another defendant’s attorney, unless they are part of the same legal team or there is a specific reason for the disclosure.

If the dismissed defendant filed a General Denial and sent a list of rebuttals to the plaintiff’s attorney, it is not guaranteed that the attorney for the other defendant will automatically receive or have access to that information. The information shared between the dismissed defendant and their attorney is typically protected by attorney-client privilege and may not be shared with others without the client’s consent.

However, it is possible that during the course of the lawsuit, the attorney for the other defendant may seek to obtain that information through legal means, such as discovery requests or subpoenas, if they believe it is relevant to their defense. The rules regarding discovery can vary depending on jurisdiction and the specific circumstances of the case.


So there ya go, Wattson! I definitely can NOT offer the landlord’s attorney a copy of my rebuttals, dammit. So I hope he goes the discovery route, or subpoenas me to testify if the first approach doesn’t work out. But I ask you:

Why on earth didn’t any counsel I sought who heard me out, TELL me that simple answer? Well, Prentiss (the “Personal Injury Angel” in my tale) DID say that Ablablah’s attorney may very well have me testify. Yet he did NOT state it is unlawful for me to offer him my list of rebuttals.

Well, at least I have my answer, and there is nothing more I can do to assist Ablablah in their defense, and thereby more strongly secure my OWN protection from scoundrels. Landlord’s attorney is not the sharpest tac in the box. However, plaintiff’s attorney strikes me as even MORE pathetic.

There is always the hope plaintiff’s attorney will simply DROP the case…for which I have provided MORE than ample cause to do just that. However, dismissing ME will give plaintiff’s attorney every good reason to hide my rebuttals from Ablablah. But he ALSO knows that IF I am subpoenaed his goose shall be cooked to a fine crisp.

But there’s also the likelihood of an out-of-court settlement via case management. I DO pray, however, that Ablablah’s attorney does NOT go that route and fights it to the shores of Dunkirk. In which case I’ll have my day in court. Something I’ve never been through before, though I sincerely appreciate how it works as an apt metaphor of my life, under the rules laid out by My Bodhisattva Premise.

– Zeke K-Holmes

P.S.: Rather than attempt to access my rebuttals, can’t the landlord’s attorney simply ask me what happened, from my perspective? At some kind of meeting…case management perhaps? After all, I am representing myself, that is: I am my OWN attorney! So I still have questions, and at this point all I can say is: THIS unfrozen caveman lawyer pilgrim is perplexed by it all. Starting with the shoes.

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