The Plot Quickens

February 12, 2021

Subject: An example of Flaco’s moodiness when in heat
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: February 1, 2021 11:48 AM

But then there’s this, taken same day:

Lucky hasn’t eaten ANYthing for the last day and a half, even turning down his treats. I think he’s despondent because his sister doesn’t wanna play with him so much, when she’s in heat…and even makes sure she’s at the other end of the bed from him, when they rest or go to sleep. He just wants to play! He even tries to get her going, by crawling under a comforter and play-attacking her that way. Eventually, he gives up and just broods. I try playing with him, but even THAT no longer works; he doesn’t even tilt his head when I scritch him on the neck…he just lays there.

Lucky makes every effort to motivate her to have some fun, but she usually just ignores him, sometimes just hopping off the bed or going to the other end. He’s healthy, wet, cold nose and all, but just seems sad, as if he lost his best friend, where’d she go?

They still DO play now and then, but it doesn’t last as long, since Flaco may growl at him, or snap. In which case, her brother pushes the blanket around with his nose, to show her he means no harm, but let’s play! He never snaps or growls back, but patiently just sits or lies there, and tries again, later. He’s a very elegant, noble doggy, but I wish he’d start eating again!

Twice so far I’ve lifted Flaco from the end of the bad, and laid her back down close to Lucky. She got the hint after a few attempts to move to another spot…and seems perfectly fine with resting beside him. So, she’s not THAT moody when she’s in heat…but Lucky appears to be overly sensitive. She’s eating fine, he’s not. I’ve just read a veterinarian’s web page that says this moody part of being in heat only lasts three or four days. I hope so, because Lucky seems SO sad!

Play, Sneeze, Stare:

Re: An example of Flaco’s moodiness when in heat
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: February 1, 2021 4:33 PM

He looks healthy! Bright eyes and everything! It’s so hard to know what’s going on in their complicated little heads…

Yes, he’s not the least bit grumpy, and loves my hugs and attention. Which I give him plenty of, to help him snap out of it. I certainly don’t want him to languish unto death, over a jilted love that will probably resume in one of two days anyway! That’s too Gothic romance for me. They are such beautiful, sweet little angels!

  • Zeke

Subject: Appetite Problem Resumes!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: February 9, 2021 9:50 PM

They’ve hardly eaten ANYthing for the past five days! A nibble here, a nibble there, and that’s all she wrote. My guess is it’s lack of exercise decreasing their need to eat as much. They otherwise appear happy, content and healthy, and show NO signs of weight loss. They NEVER act hungry, either. As for laundry and preparing for the oncoming bedbug treatment:

My portable washing machine is a godsend! I can cold-wash most things with it (just not heavy items, such as coats and blankets). Then, after they dry out in a day or two, I can take them to the laundromat and put them in the driers, on hot, for 45 minutes. Thus, I can reduce the time required to take the pups with me to the laundromat…and still get rid of any potential bugs or their eggs in my clothing and other cloth items, with the heat from the driers. Once they’re cleaned and heated up, I will seal them in special travel bags that are large, made of plastic (like ginormous Ziplocs), and only keep a single bath towel and a few clothing items out until extermination day, for which I will bag them beforehand, for post-treatment drying. Once the bug eradication is done, I can unbag all the cleaned stuff. I have a supply of these special wrappers from Amazon over two years ago, just for my bedbug episodes, and they are VERY handy for this purpose.

Bedbug treatment won’t be for at lease several days, so I have the time to wash what needs washing, hang them from a clothesline in my hovel, then heat-dry them at the laundromat the next day. The four kids sleeping bags, thick coat, two towels and a bunch of cleaning rags can be professionally washed and dried by a laundry service provided gratis for tenants (paid for by Ablahblah Realty) whenever bedbugs strike. I’ve never taken advantage of this before, because I prefer to do all this on my own; however, with the doggies now here, this service will be MOST appreciated.

Just wish I didn’t have to deal with their appetite problem, the bedbugs, no safe place to exercise the dogs, potential harassment from Deek or his allies when walking them outside, the building manager’s dubious regard towards yours truly, AND animosity from the residents in 208 ALL AT ONCE! Will this bullshit ever end? Hercules and his Twelve Labors have NOTHING over me! But I DO understand what I call “The Bodhisattva Challenge,” in which I play the hero, and for which I must go through such a seemingly impossible gauntlet in order to get from point A to point Z…the latter point being a heavenly existence IN THIS LIFE, rather than proceeding onto the next one.

But how I DO wish this were all over, for once and for all! I’m disgusted with what strikes me as a horrific series of situations that are typical for the poor and disenfranchised of this world, which is neither acknowledged nor relieved by the affluent, due to their gross lack of compassion. I DON’T EVEN HAVE ANYONE TO OFFER ME THEIR BACKYARD, to not only give my brindlekin the exercise they need, but to keep them there while drying the laundry, and having my room treated! We’ll therefore be truly homeless for half a day, with nowhere really to go. Even the building manager has not asked if I need any help with the pooches, during this time…forget about any resident or other person living here in the Castro! FUCK ‘EM ALL, I say!

Thanks for being such a good listener, my dear Wattson, and allowing me to get this all off my chest.

Your faithful compadre as always,

Ezekiel Joseph Krahlin-Holmes, Esq.

Subject: My Building Manager Just Made False Accusations!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: February 9, 11:39 PM

This was around 2:40 PM today (Tuesday, February 9, 2021):

As I was exiting my hovel, Kevin Bond (the manager) was slogging his way up the stairs from the lobby…looking rather rundown, I might add. So the dogs started barking, but Kevin didn’t pause, so I could pull them away. Instead, he walked closely past them, and Lucky then nipped at his heels and for a brief moment, clamped down on his left pants cuff, and pulled (which is what he does in play). Kevin quickly responded:

“Oh, they DO bite!”

I told him they NEVER bite. Then he accused me with:

“You’re taking poor care of those dogs!”

“That’s nonsense,” I retorted, “I take excellent care of them, and they’re doing GREAT!”

“I don’t want them running around the hallway!” he added.

“But I DON’T let them run in the hallway,” I rebounded.

Rather than converse with me like a human being to another (which I am, I assure you, Wattson, though some people accuse otherwise), he proceeded up the stairs to the next level. (And THAT’S part of the problem: he treats me as inferior to the more recent, higher paying residents. As if my living under rent control denies me rights equal to anyone else.) Whereby I called to him:

“You’re acting like a child!” To which he responded:

“No, YOU’RE acting like a child!”

Can you believe this, my good doctor? I dare say he is baiting me…hoping I’ll lose my temper, so he can set me up for eviction or, in the least, force me to get rid of the pups, that he make my life miserable. Doesn’t he realize that he’s already in a sorry position, due to permitting teenagers to loiter in my hallway, and withOUT wearing masks? Along with DOCUMENTING (in a letter to me, that he posted to my door) the false accusation by the troglodyte do in 208, that one of my dogs bit Adis, and drew blood. Whenever the heck THAT was supposed to happen, I’m sure they’ll make SOMEthing up. However, they have ZILCH evidence, nor have my pups ever been anywhere near enough to either one of the fools, to even nip at their heels!

Doesn’t he also realize he’s intentionally HARASSING me? Frankly, my dear Wattson, I’m now convinced that Mr. Bond should retire from his management position, considering what a lousy manager he’s turning into, any more! So what think you:

Should I email him with a notice I do NOT appreciate his childish behavior, that amounts to harassment as well as false accusations? That would be a hoot! And perhaps send a copy off to Ablahblah Realty, as well! Meanwhile:

I just came back from a stroll along Noe Street, when those friendly hard hats were out there, again. One of them, whose name I’ve since learned is Jesse, was SO nice to Flaco and Lucky, as he was before. And he REMEMBERED their names, addressing them as such! Well, the pooches quieted down as he talked soothingly to them, and pet them many times. We then had a most interesting conversation, including telling him about the difficulties two residents and the manager are giving me, about my brindlekin. He basically said there are lots of mean people in this world, and he doesn’t know why they just couldn’t be nice.

I assured Jesse that I’m on top of this; I’ve been through crap before, and always come out of it smelling like a rose. I just don’t appreciate the stress they add to my life, and how it interferes with my vocation, which is as an author. I also told him that I’m writing a book about my adventures with the mutts, free to read online…just google “brindlekin” and you’re good to go. Before I told him that, he admired what handsome brindle coats they have, which word “brindle” moved me to tell him about the book. He said he adopted a dog from a construction site many years ago, and had her for fourteen years. Obviously, a real dog lover, and I thanked him profusely for being so understanding and kind to my own doggos…as it helps them to socialize better.

Your friend and mutual confidante,

  • Ezekiel J. Krahlin-Holmes

Re: My Building Manager Just Made False Accusations!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: February 10, 2021 12:47 AM

My advice would be to not jump the gun just yet with a complaint against Kevin. I agree that he’s just looking for a reason to stir up shit, and a complaint against him (even though justified) would incentivize him to frame you in some way. Right now, you want to keep a fairly low profile. Maybe later you’ll want to send in a formal complaint.

Thank you, Wattson; I shall heed your advice accordingly. It’s documented anyway, through our communique…and will soon be part of my next Brindlekin chapter. But why the fuck hasn’t that attorney I contacted on January 14th, never gotten in touch? I have a REALLY good case that would be a cinch to win. Ablahblah would probably go for an out-of-court settlement. I’m hoping, though, that Kevin will simply keel over soon, and that would be that. Along with the REST of the vulgar lot. :D

I DO know of one other tenant who probably complained about the doggies, and that would be “Todd” who also occupies an SRO and shares the bathroom. He’s that crotchety old fellow who moved in around twelve years ago, and has always despised me. Probably because he hanged out at the Eagle Tavern when I did (because Larkin would go there, too), and was susceptible to the nasty gossip against me. Just my rotten luck that a couple years later he moved into 9666 Market Street, on the same floor as me, AND shares the loo! I as hoping he’d eventually move out, as most people do after three or four years…but no, he’s stickin’ to the place like a barnacle (and he’s got the personality of one, to boot).

Anyway, one day around three weeks ago, I came back upstairs with the canines, and he showed up on his way out. Of course, they barked their little puppy butts off, while he stood frozen, blankly staring into the ether like the cold, undead zombie he is. Suddenly, Flaco slid out of her collar and ran up to him and, from a foot away, keep barking. So I grabbed her by the collar, told him they don’t bite while reattaching her leash. Instead of moving on, he just stood there like one of Madame Tussaud’s villainous wax figures…until I pulled the pups close to me, passed by and entered my hovel. In conclusion:

I must ALSO take into account the Bodhisattva aspect of this latest scenario, just as I have with all previous ones. For that is key to rising above ANY unpleasant challenge. In that, my so-called “enemies” are simply setting up an outcome in which I am the conquering hero. Realizing such, I remain at peace, unperturbed towards any imagined war with the Morlocks. Though should things come to that, I am confident I shall come out of this as the victor, just the same.

How great about the kindly construction worker. Animal-lovers are always the best humans…

Yes! And the fact he’s a friendly hard-hat who probably lives outside of SF, and not one of the snooty residents here, is a big plus, I’d say.

The pups did NOT touch their breakfast, except for Lucky when I was about to step out with them. He ate about a third of his dish…AFTER pushing around Flaco’s serving (which I then removed from his sight). So I was surprised that, while he said NO to that dish, he said yes to his own. And they’re identical! Flaco, unfortunately, STILL has not taken a bite. Their meals are still out, however, with hopes they dine at LEAST a tad more. They nonetheless appear most content, happy and healthy; cold, wet noses, shiny coat and all. We had another GREAT snooze last night, they are SUCH sweet company!

  • Ezekiel J. Krahlin-Holmes, Esq.

Subject: Weird & Stupid Incident Yesterday!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: February 11, 2021 6:12 PM

I had just stepped out with the brindlekin for their second afternoon stroll, when a skateboarding troglodyte came whooshing by from behind, on this side of Market Street. The wheels were not the usual racket you’d expect, but still, disturbing enough to upset most pooches. And so, Flaco & Lucky barked like mad as he scooted by, then turned right across the intersection.

“Oh good, he’ll soon be gone,” I spoke to myself. But right after I said that, he reversed direction and came whizzing back toward us, where he then rocked his skateboard back and forth while standing upon it…thus exacerbating the dogs further. As he jittered left-and-right (arms swaying to keep balanced, while the wheels ground rudely across the the asphalt), he exclaimed to the doggies:

“Oh, you hate black people, do you?”

You see, Wattson, the young man was in blackface. You heard me: “blackface.” Not a dark mask or bandanna, but shiny, black greasepaint applied over his entire face, including forehead and ears! Though crouching to hold his equilibrium on the skateboard, I could nonetheless see he was tall, lanky, and all of twenty years, give or take.

So I hollered to him: “It’s the skateboard!”

With that, he kicked the skateboard aside and stood there, hunched down and swinging his arms like a gorilla…implying that, if the pups don’t stop barking now, they are indeed racist! Of course they did not stop, and he knew they wouldn’t, but mockingly accused:

“Oh, you’re in trouble now!”

At that point, I pulled the dogs away from the idiot and his intentional harassment, hoping nothing will further ensue (such as outright conflict)…and, happily, it did not. Seeing as the protection of my canine sweethearts is utmost above everything else, I bit my tongue and acted the milquetoast pedestrian. Something I would NEVER have done, were I minus the pooches! I would’ve decried his blackface as disgusting, to say the least; and, possibly, pulled out the pepper spray.

I proceeded then, to Duboce Food & Liquor, and said to the clerk, Morley, “Something really weird just happened to me!” After I told him about the skateboarder in blackface, and how he harassed my doggies, he responded:

“Well, some of those black masks might upset them, because their faces are hidden.”

I responded: “No, he was in LITERAL blackface! That’s why I said the incident was WEIRD!”

“Oh,” he replied, seeming a bit confused. (Doesn’t he grasp what “blackface” means? Why is it so hard to communicate on even a basic level with folks around here? It’s like I live on a different plane of reality that intersects theirs, in which I am a lone soul that no one truly sees or hears.)

“He was probably one of those Neo-Nazi punks,” I added, as I stepped out to continue our walk along Noe Street.

Now, that’s all I had planned to write in this email, except for TWO (not one, but TWO) stupid things that just happened, upon my stepping out after composing the passage above:

I brought the pups with me to do another batch of laundry, in preparation for the bedbug treatment. I was in a rush, because the nearest laundromat (four blocks away) is on the “Pandemic Time Zone,” or IOW, they close by 3 PM, and it was already 2:45. Well, wouldn’t you know, halfway there some black dude on a bicycle approached me and queried, “Those are Deek’s dogs, aren’t they?”

So I stopped, as the dogs once more barked up a storm, and told him over the din: “Technically, no. I purchased them outright, per a verbal agreement.”

He then challenged me, saying that Deek is confused as to why I won’t return the pooches. So I whipped out my smartphone, and showed him the video or our agreement. (The dogs were barking all this time, even though he raised a closed umbrella at them, and told them to quiet down…which really pissed me off.) But less than halfway through the video, he blurted out that nowhere did Deek agree to sell them. I countered with: “You need to listen to the whole thing…will you do that now?” He said okay, so I replayed it, and he listened more carefully.

I should tell you he kept insisting I hand him the phone, he’s not a thief, he’ll return it…AS IF THERE WERE NO MORE PANDEMIC, FER CRIPES SAKE. But I refused, and just held it up, close to his face. After listening to the entire video, he declared that nowhere in it, did it show him accepting the $300, or saying that he just received that amount. Well, I said that Deek is bipolar, says one thing one day, the opposite thing the next…and has a reputation for backstabbing his friends…I’ve done TONS of good deeds for him, over the nine-plus years we’ve known each other…I realize he’s badmouthing me behind his back(as he often does)…but I’m doing him a HUGE favored by caring for these dogs, essentially saving their lives, as he started abusing them, including getting short-tempered, shoving them, kicking them, keeping them exposed to the chilly rain, and forcing them to sleep on the cold concrete.

Well, he opposed all my claims, saying that he’s NEVER seen Deek treat his dogs badly, or turn on his friends. Well, I replied, you don’t really know him very well at all. He then talked about Deek’s friends advising him to go to the police…and added, while waving his smartphone in my face (as if to cause me fear):

“I have technology on this phone, that allowed me to copy that video…so I now have it to show anyone I want.”

As if that’s supposed to impress me, eh, Dr. Wattson? So I said fine with me, then informed him it’s been on Youtube for weeks now, for anyone to see. Just google “brindlekin” and you’ll find it. Well, he whipped out a pencil and a small paper pad, and asked me to spell it out, so I did. Wherewith he finally departed, and I rushed helter-skelter to the laundromat, hoping I’d get there in time! It turned out to be five after three, but they let me in, anyway. After shoving two kids sleeping bags I use for doggie blankets (I have a total of four, so they have all the fluffy they want) into one of the larger washing machines, I took them for a walk. Returning twenty minutes later, because it had started to rain, I decided we should sit inside for the remaining forty minutes or so to run them through a drier.

But guess what: they started barking up a storm, even though yesterday they were perfectly silent! So I had to rush them home and return later, with one dog, Flaco, to collect the laundry. Seeing as she was in heat, I did NOT want to leave them both alone in my hovel. Unfortunately, it was a pretty heavy rain we had to slog through, both there and back. There was NO prediction for a storm this afternoon, that I knew of, and I had planned to take them for two long walks while the items were being washed and dried. And, ironically enough, aNOTHER friend of Deek’s–a toothless little woman I think they call “Peanut”–showed up at the laundromat while the brindlekin were still there. Of course, she insisted on talking with them, which just aroused them into barking once more!

Of course, both Flaco and I were soaking wet upon returning hovel, but I remained sopping wet for awhile longer, as I dried her off with those disposable, heavy-duty utility towels someone purchased for me from my Amazon Doggy Wish List. 160 per box! And I had YET to eat the second half of my breakfast!

So now I can’t take the doggies with me, even to do my laundry…unless, perhaps, I bring just one. Though that may not be necessary, as it was the sudden rainfall that threw a monkey wrench into my plans. But I’m wondering if I should take them on walks SEPARATELY, seeing as they are more pacific than they are as a team. I think her being in heat has made both of them more aggressive…that is, more protective, of each other. And what’s gonna happen with the “Deek” situation, now that I’ve had my first challenge by one of his puppet allies? For now, that dude on the bike will no doubt put the idea into his head to claim he never RECEIVED my payment in the first place, in hopes of riling up some of his street minions.

And this is PRECISELY what I feared would happen, should I start walking the dogs in part of the territory where his allies hang out from time to time, or pass through! But that’s EXACTLY where the laundromat is located! Now that I think of it, I should NEVER take them there again, at all. I regret having done it in the first place. But it makes things so much more DIFFICULT for me, of course. As if all this bullshit weren’t enough for a 24-hour span of time:

Last night I believe I heard Deek call to me from across the street. His usual “Yo! Yo!” though not so strident as before. It was 11:35 PM, and at first I decided to ignore him, but about a minute later I peered out the window. He was not there, gazing in my direction, but I believe that WAS him, pushing a shopping cart towards Castro Street. In sum:

Chaos, hostility and conflict are the LAST things I want in my life, but nonetheless they come to me unbidden, on a frequent basis, no matter HOW much I try to live a peaceful, sane life. But this is what it’s like to be on a low income, which forces one to exist in compromising environments populated by scads of lowbrow skunks just itching to fuck with anyone they perceive as vulnerable. And naturally, I often become their choice of target, because of my reputation as a gay activist, and the gossip around me about how I don’t “earn a living.” Not to mention all the hateful plotting against me in those gay bars South of Market, that has spilled over into the Castro and STILL lingers on, especially from one “Todd” who shares the bathroom on the same floor, and who was poisoned against me by gossipy queens years ago, when we both hanged out at the same SOMA dive, The Eagle Tavern. Ironically, he didn’t LIVE in my building at that time, but moved in several years later…long after I stopping going to the SOMA dives.

That was back in my “Larkin Years.” Imagine that: how LONG those tentacles of hatred extend so far forward into the future to remain present in my life, even today! It’s like I have barnacles attached to my aura, that I picked up while floating through an especially polluted part of the ocean of Universal Mind.

Now, I do NOT want to leave on a bitter note, so here comes the “Bodhisattva Stipulation” once again:

Those who play my enemy will increase their harassment in greater proportion and frequency, as my victory nears. Like how some people plan a big surprise party by suddenly acting surly to the lucky recipient of this honor, in order to make the surprise that much richer. The actual DAY of this surprise I do NOT know, but surely it is due, very soon. This also makes sense in light of my building manager blurting out what a lousy job I’m doing, of caring for my pups.

  • Zeke

PS: I’ve just completed, this morning, converting ALL my KNYO audio recordings of 2017-2018 into video…so they are ALL on my Youtube channel now! What a happy accomplishment. Yet, for some unknown reason, Marshall has ceased reading ANY of my pieces on his weekly “Memo of the Weird” radio show. Last of my tales he’s read was on January 8th. Totally disappointing, as he seems to immensely enjoy narrating my works, and these latest ones are OUTSTANDING material that would be an asset for ANY radio station to air. I’ve posted him several emails asking why he’s ceased, as well as telling him I’m interested in resuming my call-ins. Yet he has NOT responded to any of my emails. A new mystery to solve, I suppose…don’t you agree, Dr. Wattson, mon bon ami?

Re: Weird & Stupid Incident Yesterday!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: February 11, 2021 11:24 PM

Awful. I admire your restraint and your reserves of energy. Yes, one of the worst things about being poor is that you’re at the mercy of whatever fate slings at you, without the protective padding money can provide. The fucking jerk in blackface, and then the clerk not knowing what the term even means. Then the other guy accusing you of “stealing” the dogs. The brute thick-skulled aggrieved aggressiveness of the Capitol mob permeating every level of society.

Well THAT was well said, my dear Wattson! In my latest assignment to uncover a dark mystery with roots deeper than I anticipated, I have embedded myself among the apes. I forgot to ALSO mention that last night around 10:30 PM, a policeman was out front by his parked vehicle, talking with (of all people) Myrtle and her son, Adis! I have NO idea how, what, who, where, when or why, but Adis was feigning such a happy-go-lucky demeanor, it literally reeked of falsity. As if he were attempting to bury his conscience under a pile of feigned devil-may-care dirt, and plant a flower in it! If he has a green thumb, I’d say it’s GANGrenous! They are partners in crime, mother-and-son, in cahoots with Kevin Bond the building manager!

His agreement to allow her son’s teenage friends to loiter in the hallway withOUT wearing masks (and withOUT informing all residents in the immediate vicinity) makes him slam-dunk complicit. And mom and son OPTED for this scenario, to protect THEMSELVES from spreading covid-19 among each other, IOW: they shifted the risk onto my own person, and that of other residents living close by, as well as anyone passing up and down the stairs (which includes a few elderly people, two hobbling along with a cane, and another with a wheelchair).

Add to this the false accusation by mother-and-son of one of my dogs biting Adis, and drawing blood. Which accusation Kevin seemed most eager to push forward, in spite of the OBVIOUS bad timing of such a claim, because it came right on the heels of their receiving a copy of my complaint against them, to Ablahblah Realty! Ain’t they nice people! I have a feeling, Wattson, that their guts are churning with guilt, and soon worms will bust holes in their midriff to escape their horrid surroundings!

Don’t know what’s up with Marshall; like I said, haven’t seen him or talked to him in about a year…

Yes, I know you haven’t, but I wanted to reflect upon this situation, as I find it MOST perplexing, in light of the fact he HAD resumed reading my tales last month with apparent delight. Then, abruptly it seems, dropped me like a rabid porcupine. Did some ONE or some THING get to him? On another matter:

The pups ate heartily tonight, and last night…but nothing at all in the morning or afternoon. They are NOT big eaters, I must say! Now, they are happily a-snooze, lying on their backs with hind legs splayed, torsos curved, paws dangling drupaceously from their front legs, and heads turned to one side or the other: UTTER, BLISSFUL CONTENTMENT! They are smiling. I am SO glad to give them sanctuary through it all. Mine is an amazing story of how the good triumphs over evil, thus it SHALL have a most joyful ending, indeed. Which SHOULD be very soon as I have already completed 32 awesome chapters as of yesterday!

Your comrade in arms, in service always to Her Majesty, I remain:

Ezekiel Joseph Krahlin-Holmes, Esq.

[Anamorphic reader: I neglected to include the following posts in an earlier chapter, so I thought I’d append them here. They span a period from mid-December to early January.]

Subject: Maybe you’ll read these tales I wrote, on your radio show?
From: copperbot9
To: Marshall McGee
Date: December 16, 2020 7:50 PM

Zeke here…using one of my backup emails because I know you blocked my main one. I’m in a new cycle of writing, which results so far have been really good…and I think you’ll enjoy them. There are five in all; two
are very brief. I will provide the links to them below (from my WordPress blog) followed by a duplicate of each of them in pure text, via other links I have set up on my Gay Bible website. I also want to inform you that a Youtube narrator by name of Curious Raven has recently read two of my horror tales, and posted them to her channel. You’ve already read them on your show, but I think you might enjoy listening to her uniquely eerie style.

Skin in the Box & The Screaming Machete by: Zeke Krahlin

Furthermore: I will no longer post a barrage of articles to the MCN listserver, because I need to focus on this latest burst of creativity…including my new project to help provide for two homeless doggies that my street friend of many years, Zayne, adopted. In fact, the stories I’m linking you to are all ABOUT him and his pooches, Lucky & Flaco (pronounced “flah-koh,” it’s Spanish for “skinny.”) Tale #1 is very short, and describes some pics included therein…but listeners will get the full gist of it without these images, just the same. Now
for the WordPress links (followed by their matching text links). They are in chronological order, from top to bottom…so best read in that manner:

–begin list:

More Than a Hole in the Ground (blog):

More Than a Hole in the Ground (text):


I’m Counting on His Hug (blog):

I’m Counting on His Hug (text):


3-Night Dogs (blog):

3-Night Dogs (text):


Surprise! Jackets Have Arrived! (blog):

Surprise! Jackets Have Arrived! (text):


Doggy Wish List (blog):

Doggy Wish List (text):

–end of list

Thank you for your thoughtful attention, Marshall.

  • Ezekiel J. Krahlin

Subject: Today marks the day I announce my tales to San Francisco!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Tara Roosevelt
Date: December 25, 2020 4:28 PM

Gay papers, Reddit, Twitter, and so on. One great example of how I’m presenting myself, is here on Reddit:

There are THREE SF related forums on Reedit. Deek will eventually catch wind of it, and probably be furious. However, this is my attempt to secure the safety of my brindlekin, by turning it into a citywide phenomenon. Readers will come to understand my horrid situation, and offer REAL help. Maybe even the SPCA will join in! Another benefit of this kind of promotion, is that readers will also discover my Amazon Wish List and GoFundMe appeal. I just got the idea to do this a scan moment ago. Yay!

Subject: Brindlekin Tales, a work in progress
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Announce MCN, Discussion MCN
Date: December 26, 2020 6:05 PM

I have just created a separate section on my Zekeblog, called “Brindlekin Tales.” This is so I can reorganize those blog posts about the two little doggies that are inspiring me to write a book about them, chapter by chapter. It’s a work in progress, and you can subscribe to my WordPress blog, to keep up with my tales…or not, because I’ll also post my latest blog entry here, too.

The link is below, in my new sig. Thank you everyone who has given me such incredible support, whether money, gifts or kind words…thus inspiring me further, and to greater heights.

Included in my gratitude are those who’ve played my enemy, and perhaps will continue to do for awhile longer. They’ve done a bang-up job of challenging me to grow stronger and wiser, and not go soft on me. As the Buddha once said:

“We have no enemies, only teachers.”

So HAPPY EXMASS TO YOU ALL! 2021 will be an unbelievably incredible year!

Subject: Update to my next tale you will read (and other info)
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Marshall McGee
Date: January 4, 2021 1:02 PM

First, I thank you for another excellent reading of one of my turgid little masterpieces, which has just been spliced and uploaded to my Youtube channel’s “Brindlekin Tales” playlist at:

Notice I’ve changed the title of these tales from “Lucky & Flaco: A Tale of Two Doggies” to “Brindlekin Tales.” I’ve also changed all real names to pseudonymous ones, including: “Zayne” is now “Deek,” “Lucky” is now “Taco” and “Flaco” is now “Wiley.” And YOUR pseudonym is “Marshall McGee,” ha-ha.

I have made some minor edits to the next two tales on the list I sent you, of which three remain. The third one (Doggy Wish List & GoFundMe) includes a MAJOR edit. Please get the updated versions here (notice I’ve included the approximate reading time for each). The text version is below each web link:

Ch.3: 3-Night Dogs (15-19 minutes)

Ch. 4: Surprise! Jackets Have Arrived! (10-12 minutes)

Ch. 5: Doggy Wish List & GoFundMe (2-3 minutes)

Being that these doggy tales are up to chapter 16 with no end in sight, you might consider reading a second tale of mine on the same night, outside of these, because VERY funny! Since “Ch. 5: Doggy Wish List & GoFundMe” will take less than three minutes to narrate, that would be a good evening to incorporate an additional tale. Here are two, recently composed and utterly hilarious, pieces which I’m sure you will immensely enjoy broadcasting:

2021 is Going to be a FANTASTIC Year! (4-5 minutes)

My Year of the Wig (16-20 minutes)

Or, if you’d like, we can resume our call-ins, to which I am much more amenable than previously, due to newfound confidence. At which times I can read any of my non-doggy pieces. Just say the word!

As you can see (or will very soon see), I have made a TREMENDOUS leap in my gifts as an author…which commenced around the end of last October. And as a result, I believe each and every one of my new tales will immeasurably improve the lives of those who read them, because they are MOST inspiring, captivating and a delight to read. Not to mention, in some cases they’re real cliffhangers!

BTW, my Brindlekin Tales are now online, as a lovingly designed page called “An Adventure in Process” here:

Most sincerely, appreciatively and joyfully:

  • Ezekiel J. Krahlin

PS: Feel free to read this missive online, if you’d like…including that passage about the pseudonyms.

Subject: Here’s a proposition for ya!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Marshall McGee
Date: January 9, 2021 5:30 PM

While I AM delighted that you read ANYthing by me over the airwaves, I WAS disappointed that you did not read the next consecutive chapter of my Brindlekin Tales, which is chapter 3. Instead, you read just an excerpt from my latest chapter. My reason for the disappointment, was because I was looking forward to uploading each of my chapters narrated by you, to my Youtube channel…offering therefore a new chapter each week for my growing base of fans. So here’s my proposition:

That you narrate each of my growing collection of chapters once per week or more (however you please)…OFF THE AIR, then make each recording available to me for download. What’s in it for you:

As I climb to fame, you would too. Your narrations would be featured on my Youtube Brindlekin page, as well as linked via my WordPress Brindlekin blog. They will also be posted to my Facebook and Twitter accounts, also named “Brindlekin.”

And since EVERYthing I write I regard as public domain, you are free to use your recordings any way you want, including of course, playing them on your own radio show. My Brindlekin tales average almost a half hour each, in reading time. Longer ones can be broken up into two parts…as I already have one chapter that takes 55 minutes to read. I think a half hour or a little less is the perfect length for Youtube narrated videos.

Otherwise, my only option would be to recite these tales myself. My smartphone has pretty good recording capability, but it certainly does not match the quality of your own audios. Nor do I have the peaceful ambiance by which to narrate, even late at night. But it’s doable.

Having said this: if you prefer to go your own way, and read my stories whenever and however you please, more power to you, Marshall. I would STILL consider it both a delight and an honor.

  • Zeke

The Falcon Visits

September 4, 2014


A continuation of Facebook messages (see addendum to blog post “A Cautionary Email“) between myself and a good friend of Bryan who was recently murdered in my neighborhood. These two exchanges occurred on August 26th and 27th.

Friend of Bryan:

I agree completely and again thank you for sharing. Bryan was so totally against any type of violence, even defending himself I believe would have been out of character. I had witnessed him diffuse numerous situations just by talking people down. I know that sounds silly, and I wish it had been easy enough for him to diffuse this confrontation. He probably wasn’t clear in his thinking at the time either. I’m reading these news articles that show the video clip of this suspect that they want to question and some mention that there were people that witnessed this attack. How does one do that? How does one stand and watch someone have the life beaten from them and not intervene in some way? Scream, yell, call 911, if there was more than 1 witness – step in and stop it. Did they enjoy this? Did they enjoy watching this? How twisted is society that people think it’s okay to let something like this happen? Just as guilty as the animal that threw the blows. Unfortunately, even if Bryan had fought back, my understanding is the aneurysm was inevitable. If it hadn’t happened as a result of the beating it was bound to happen soon after. If he bumped his head or eventually it would have just happened due to the weakened blood vessels in his brain. Not that it makes it any easier but this is what we’ve been told. I’m still trying to catch up on reading materials you’ve sent me . How did you fare with the earthquake? Did it affect your area significantly? They seem to just be reporting on Napa and the damage to the wineries.


When it comes to watching out for your neighbors, the Castro scores very low. Sometimes people stand around and laugh at someone being attacked.

It’s happened to me more than once. Some will even go so far as to blame /me/ for the violence, for example: a big dude starting shoving me and so I squirted him with pepper spray. When the cops arrived, a bystander ran up to ’em and accused /me/ of attacking that “harmless” fellow. Yeah, he was 6-foot-2 and under 30…whereas I am 5-foot-7 and 64! But it was obvious to the bluecoats after taking one good look at the goon who tried to knock me down, that I was in the right. Society creates its own monsters, Rikki. Every crazy or dangerous person is a product of the surrounding mileau in which he’s born and raised. America’s cowboy capitalism /forces/ many to behave like psychopaths. Yet I do not believe this is anything more than what experiences humanity needs to go through, until finally that phase comes to an end. Nothing is anywhere near as bad as it may seem. But by the same token, such comprehension of how life operates can never be grasped even one iota…until a person has lived through the required number of trials it takes to get there. It’s sort of one of nature’s “great secrets.” And you kind of have to “earn” the privilege to see beyond the illusion. Yet I am certain that now that I’m writing about it and releasing my gift to the world, that the time is very, very close, for all humanity to grow out of chaos and disaster. Or I wouldn’t be able to broadcast my words across the globe, that is: something or other would block the process. As for the earthquake: I just posted a blog entry about it, and you should see it on your FB page. But just in case, here’s the URL: Isn’t it interesting that Bryan’s passage has put us in contact? Blessings on you always, and try not to get /too/ upset over what seem to be tragedies. For that’s only the first stage; all that comes forth after that will do much to turn this world into a far better planet than it now appears. <3 <3 <3

I was diagnosed years ago with borderline schizophrenia, borderline bipolar, borderline PTSD…borderline everything! It was not any chemical, but talk therapy and Carl Jung’s teachings that finally healed me. Jung spoke of archetypes and the collective unconscious. He introduced compassion into the world of psychotherapy. I use the same methods with those lost gay souls stranded on the streets. Not in any professional sense, but as a gift I’ve finely honed at this point in my life. And it works…though took years and years and years to finally witness my good works grow like bean sprouts. Now (and since the publication of my first novel in December 2013) things are moving /very/ fast, and I can hardly contain my excitement.

Like the great author, Herman Hesse, I am a disciple of Carl Jung, and all my writings use Jungian style symbolism throughout. In that manner, my words become a potent healing force to anyone who reads or listens.




Date: Tue, 2 Sep 2014 15:02:21
The Falcon Visits
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Ellie

Tuesday Sept. 2nd – 2:40 PM

Just moments ago I glimpsed Larkin at Duboce Park’s second water fountain, accompanied with the usual black and white doggie. He had on Bermuda shorts, sandals, light jacket and that red haversack which closely resembles my own. I had just disembarked from the N Judah from my little stroll of the Inner Sunset District, to enjoy the gray skies and chill ocean breeze.

I wondered whether or not to run up to him, or just stand there and holler across the grassy knoll. When I saw he was /not/ coming in my direction, but was about to disappear in the opposite, I chose the former:

“Larkin!” my echo boomed across the green. He turned his head to his left, saw me waving back. Of course Larkin ignored me and moved on. I was about to scamper towards him, when in that instant a large bird swooped down on the grass just ten feet distant, causing me to halt. I’ve never seen that species in real life, except sometimes up in the Marin Headlands.

It was a peregrine falcon!

A glorious creature decked out in brown feathery shades with splashes of white. The wind fluffed him this way and that, and he looked upon me as if in greeting…or perhaps to warn me to stay put.

I remained frozen to the spot, so I could admire this falcon as long as possible. That lasted about five minutes: certainly long enough to prevent me from seeing My Wyvern a bit longer.

Was he /my/ guardian or Larkin’s…or both? I doubt the falcon’s sudden distraction was a warning, seeing as I don’t cotton to paranoid interpretations. But here is what I believe to be the purpose of his honorable visit:

If more than two weeks pass w/o my getting even a glimpse of Larkin, he is sure to make an appearance some time in the third week…even if from a distance, even if but for a moment. And that is what he did for me today, with the added blessing of the falcon’s salutation.

– Zeke

Date: Wed, 3 Sep 2014 14:47:40
Re: The Falcon Visits
From: Zeke
To: Ellie

On Wed, Sep 3, 2014 at 12:01 PM, Eleanor wrote:

{{ Urban magik! }}

Been happening to me more and more these days.

Several days before /that/ avian epiphany (and also at Duboce Park), I was walking up the path to the other side when from about 60 feet distant, this lady’s sweet old doggie was gazing at me with love in her eyes. I /knew/ she wanted to greet me, so instead of veering to my right on the inside corner by that water fountain, I continued straight ahead. So the doggie could leave her master for a moment and give me a kiss (and I could pet her a bit)…then return to her spot in the cool shade.

The owner was pleasantly startled: “She never does that to anyone!”

“Oh, we noticed each other from across the park,” I smiled back. “It was love at first sight!”

That evening as I returned up Noe Street from 7/11, I saw a large raccoon amble across the street to my side…from about 20 feet away.

“Hey, Rocky, how ya doin’?” I queried as I neared the alleyway between two Edwardians. And there he was:

Clambering up the tall grating that reached well over 12 feet. Each bar was almost an inch thick, made of steel and square cornered. I was astounded how those little paws somehow managed to grip the slippery rods with ease, as he scooted to the top and over with great agility. I called out once more:

“Rocky! I mean no harm, just want to wish you a lovely night.”

Once he reached the ground on the opposite side (took all of ten seconds from start to finish, if not less), he paused as if to look at me, smile and say: “Thanks! You too, dawg.” Then scuttled off to the garbage bins hidden further back and cloaked in darkness. Where I’m sure he collected some tasty morsels to bring back to his pals…as he likely does each and every night.

– Zeke

PS: I’ve also been meeting more gorgeous dudes than ever! One hotter than the last, though I don’t see how that’s possible coz they’re /all/ 10-plus-plus-pluses! Definitely /My/ Kind Of Global Warming.


A Cautionary Email

August 23, 2014

From: A Friend of Bryan
To: Zeke Krahlin
Date: Mon, 18 Aug 2014 13:28:30
ZekeBlog 2.0 Comment

I’ve just read your ‘Another One Bites the Faery Dust‘ and hope that you take a little of your apparent precious time to read my note to you in response.

I apologize you never got the chance to know Bryan. I am truly sorry that you apparently haven’t been able to come to terms with your own apparent issues which after reading your blog you do in fact have. Otherwise people wouldn’t disregard you or invalidate you. I’m sorry that for some reason in your sad little life you feel you have the right to judge others merely by their appearance.

I would tell you about Bryan and could probably give you some insight into why you may have gotten some of the responses that you received or say you received from him. I can tell you that he was far from wealthy in a monetary sense. But he was apparently much wealthier than you’ll ever hope to be in the fact that he was loved and cared for by so many both in San Francisco as well as back home in Michigan.

Are you sure it wasn’t a reflection of yourself staring at you with soulless eyes because everytime I looked into his they were comforting and welcoming.

I believe you Zeke are just a hateful, narcissistic being and hope that nothing like this ever happens to you.

And if it does I’m certain that someone will be blogging ‘Good riddance’ to your existance and that they “Never gave a fuk” about you.

As for a Mama’s boy, I will give you that much. Yes he was, right up until she died 7 years ago while Bryan and I held her hand.

Don’t judge, get off your soapbox as you are no better than anyone else. You obviously know this and it just makes you feel better to insult others. I apologize that you’ll never know love because if you did you damn sure wouldn’t be the hateful son of a bitch that you are now.

Date: Mon, 18 Aug 2014 14:06:36
Re: ZekeBlog 2.0 Comment
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: A Friend of Bryan

That’s okay you are upset with me. I am attempting to dredge out certain reactions by community residents. As assistant to a detective, I play the decoy. There is a cult connected with this murder which my associate and I have been pursuing for almost nine years now. More than half were busted in 2007…but the remaining goons have migrated to the Castro.

Which is where I’ve been living since 1983. The detective has moved less than a block from me, for my protection. This cult intentionally spreads tragedy and mayhem through gay neighborhoods, many of whom are gay themselves.. I have to come off as a pathetic flake in order to protect myself, as well as catch some suspects off guard. They have already killed several of my friends since 2008, and have frightened other potential friends away from me. Thanks to this cult, I’ve been existing in virtual social isolation, except for my detective buddy.

AFAICT all remaining cult members will soon be rounded up and thrown into prison. They are the main reason the Castro presently suffers a dangerous uptick in violent crime.

Anyways, my apologies for getting you caught in a bit of crossfire.

From: Zeke Krahlin
To: A Friend of Bryan
Date: Tue, 19 Aug 2014 10:17:09
Re: ZekeBlog 2.0 Comment

A Friend of Bryan wrote:

{{ My apologies for the many insults. As no one should know your position, neither did I. It’s still very much raw as I’m sure you’ve experienced and can imagine.

Good luck to you }}

No problem,I don’t blame you one bit. Bringing out anger in a group is one tactic that helps flush out suspects. My scathing remarks against Bryan will be removed in two weeks…that’s plenty long for my purpose. Then, I’ll repost that blog entry and give him honors.

I am very concerned about two of my homeless friends out there, considering the violence going on. They are both great guys and are moving ahead with their lives…and I’m very proud of them. Wouldn’t even know they’re homeless at this point, they’re so clean and considerate. Last thing I need is to lose them, too. In fact, I wrote about one of ’em in that piece which includes Bryan. It’s at the very end section called “ThankDragon for Trace.”

It is not that you shouldn’t know about my activities, I am at the tail end of a long and crazy journey, and it is okay for me to reveal /some/ of what I do. IOW, I’m pretty much outta the woods now. FYI, my first book is out, and the reader learns how I stumbled onto this cult, and a wonderful man who I discover is a detective. All true, with my own flights of fancy interjected. You may read it for free online, at:

One purpose of that book (though there are many others) is to expose this cult and cease their misery.

Book 2 is also up there, so is Book 3 (a work in progress). I am actually greatly blessed and honored that kismet brought me such adventures, and a great love in this handsome detective, whose real name is Larkin Kelsey…though in Book 1, I use the pseudonym “Arwyn Miles”…and made him 6-foot-7 instead of his actual 6-foot-4. He gave me permission to use his real name starting with Book 2. It is my dream to use the profits off my publications to open a home for severely disabled LGBT veterans. And employ good people on the streets for whatever position suits them (cooks, companions, drivers, gardeners, accountants, etc.).

Those followers of my WordPress blog can keep up with my present adventures…most of which will be put into Book 3. But here are some tales there you might enjoy (in chronological order):

But It Won’t Make Me Happy

A Little Lizard’s Lament

Letter to Zachary

He Shoved Me Again!

I’m a Decoy for the SFPD!

Four Times in One Day

The Misery & The Ecstasy

Some of my blog readers BTW, are members of the SFPD. For in my tales I often include details about the homeless, both the good and the bad. That their work may be eaiser to fulfill, in as compassionate a way as possible. Again, you have nothing to be sorry for, standing up for a good friend. My role is a most awkward (and often thankless) task…though the rewards will be immense, and will benefit not only myself, but gay folks at large.

Blessed be!

– Zeke Krahlin

From: A Friend of Bryan
To: Zeke Krahlin
Date: Tue, 19 Aug 2014 16:23:58
Re: ZekeBlog 2.0 Comment

I did in fact read just about everything on your page yesterday trying to in a sense figure you out. Bryan’s mother was my best friend and sadly her time was cut very short as well. I became very close to him in the time she was in the hospital and drew what strength I needed to get through that ordeal from him. She made me her POA which is not easy for anyone but given she was married, had 4 children, 2 brothers and a sister it made things a little more difficult given the remarks and the second guessing.

Knowing him the way I did and knowing the demons that he constantly fought I was obviously immediately livid when I read your blog. If you do in fact work with the detectives out there and are familiar with this case then I’m certain you’re aware of said demons as well. There were times he was a little rough around the edges but I never knew him to take those feelings out on anyone but himself so I hope you see where I’m coming from and I look forward to reading the reposted version. Thank you for the links, and for the insight. I really do appreciate it and I will check them out when I get home.

Have a beautiful evening Zeke.

From: Zeke Krahlin
To: A Friend of Bryan
Date: Tue, 19 Aug 2014 18:20:14
Re: ZekeBlog 2.0 Comment

A Friend of Bryan wrote:

{{ I did in fact read just about everything on your page yesterday trying to in a sense figure you out. Your empathic nature is /most/ impressive…and I thank you for bearing with me. }}

I will soon compose a very sweet memorial to Bryan, though I hardly knew him. And I promise: I am /not/ deceiving you, it /will/ show up on that blog entry by Sept. 1, if not earlier. In fact, I’ll send you the redaction soon as I complete it, which I will be working on tonight and tomorrow.

Yes, I work with a detective, a private eye hired by the SFPD. They needed an outside gumshoe, because some members of this cult /are/ San Francisco cops. How I stumbled into this cult, and became a detective’s assistant is an amazing story in its own right. I do /not/ get any remuneration for my good works…but in the long run I will. Though what really matters is righting egregious wrongs, even if I wind up homeless.

What is strange (and remarkable) is that I found a “gray hoodie” near Duboce Park, the next day after the murder of Bryan. The suspect was described as wearing a gray hoodie. That next day (Monday, July 18) I was strolling through Duboce Park on the way back home. At Noe & 15th I found a discarded jacket. It was a thin-leather outer shell, with a gray-hoodie lining. And in such perfect, new condition, I couldn’t understand why anyone would discard it.

Now, with some hindsight after learning of Bryan’s demise, I /do/ comprehend. Though it may not be the same jacket that the criminal wore, I wonder if any witness just noticed the gray hood and not the black leather that covered the jacket itself…thus, described it as a “gray hoodie.” It was only yesterday that I considered this possibility, and a shiver went up my spine.

But before this realization, I passed on this jacket to a dear street friend, whom I shall call “Trace” in my tales. Now, I wonder if the street thug will spot his jacket on my buddy, and attack him, too. Life is quite bizarre, and this is not the first time I have been thrust into an extraordinary circumstance. Though I have faith that Trace shall not be victimized. In the sense that even the worst souls on this planet must be liberated and forgiven for their heinous deeds.Therefore I interpret this “jacket” episode as a sign of some sort of spiritual liberation for the perpetrator. But I will also tell you this:

From the recent wisdom I have gained about Life’s Workings, no one really suffers the horrid acts of violence and murder…in fact, no one actually /dies/, but is shunted to another sphere of heavenly peace before such an incident occurs. Whereby angels replace their souls and act out the remainder of their deathly throes…that we, as external observers, can learn compassion and long suffering without any person actually experiencing such horror.

Most folks get quite upset at the claims I just made to you in the above paragraphs. Understandable, ’cause it does get complicated. But I conclude that if God (or Goddess or the Great Spirit or Spaghetti Monster or what have you) is truly compassionate, he or she would /never/ allow any human being to go through such nasty outcomes. What I am saying implies thusly to Bryan:

Well before he was attacked and killed, his soul departed to a heavenly existence. And an angel’s spirit occupied his shell of a body during the time he was brutally destroyed. Thus, we (as observers) may suffer his loss and hopefully learn to be more loving towards others, not just our close friends, but strangers as well. For it is my belief at this point, that if Our Creator (or Universal Mind) is a truly loving God, this is how he teaches us to grow kinder and more concerned about /all/ people on this planet.

This philosophy of a benevolent creator I have expounded upon in my essay “NeoPositivity, a Gay Religion” which you may read here:

This wisdom has made things so much easier to help bust a cult that I stumbled onto more than seven years ago. And realize that, while I might experience a close call now and then, I will always be perfectly fine. Take this as you will, I don’t expect every single person to understand where I’m coming from. In fact, most people /don’t/. But in these last several years of personal experiences, this ideology has proven itself to me, 100% of the time, to be the absolute truth.

While realization to the greater part of humanity will prove to be a godsend to many long-suffering and sweet-natured souls.

I will not tell Trace of my suspicion about where that jacket came from, as it will probably freak him out and cause him to get rid of it. There is great joy for me to part with something which I valued greatly. Due to his incredible achievements in overcoming the brutality of surviving the streets, to present him with such a lovely gift I know will do wonders for his ultimate success.

And that, perhaps, is the liberating aspect of one who has committed a grisly crime.

Yours truly,



IT HAS OCCURRED TO ME that one of your “friends” on Facebook may have discouraged you from my posting to my page. Because I noticed someone in your list who is /not/ a very nice man. He is part of a clique that has for years denigrated me, and chased any potential friend or lover away (by instilling fear in them against me). I know who it is, and can tell you in person. His name starts with a “W” (whether first or last I will not say in this message).

The fact that you still keep me off your FB page indicates that someone may have spoken bad about me. You made a rather suspicious excuse for not re-friending me: “Oh, you needed a few days off from getting back on” (I paraphrase). That doesn’t make any sense…because I didn’t. I know myself better than you or anyone else. (Except perhaps Larkin, for he /is/ my Guardian Dragon.)

Another excuse you recently made for distancing yourself from me, is that you had some ex-wife BS to deal with, and you “needed your own space” for a while. I also need to vent on something you said about what “friendship” means:

You stated that the employees at Bean There /are/ my friends. Nope. They are friendly ’cause that is good for business…and I’m sure they’re nice people outside of work. But the point I tried to make (though you stormed off and slammed the door before I could) is this:


These Bean There workers are not people I spend time with in any way, shape or form. Not a one has invited me to hang out with him (or her). Therefore:


But I think you already know this, thus I am suspicious of your /real/ motives.

The people in this neighborhood and city are, for the most part, disgusting. They have compartmentalized me into social isolation…none speak well of me. In spite of my /many/ years’ devotion to LGBT rights. Though friendly enough to my face…they have never introduced me to their other friends as a veteran gay activist and author of many years. Nor do they /ever/ run up to greet me, or present themselves with a genuine smile. An indication they’d rather have nothing to do with me, and wish me to disappear.

Such social invisibility makes me quite vulnerable to thugs roaming the streets at night…as they choose those who appear vulnerable and friendless. IOW I am an easy mark for their homophobia.

So other long term residents such as Linda (laundromat manager), Guy (who sells flowers at Noe & 15th) and Les (who runs the liquor/grocery store just across the street from Guy)…are potential murderers. They isolate good people like me, that I may become more susceptible to violent attacks. Hoping of course to eliminate me w/o any mark of blood on their hands. And such deplorable behavior is how a neighborhood can be more readily manipulated by this cult I’ve described to you numerous times.

In fact, I’d say that such 2-faced neighbors are willful members of this cult. Know the saying: “God forgive them, for they know not what they do?” Well, what strikes me as particularly evil about these dirtbags, is they KNOW what they do!


FURTHERMORE: The only thing you’ve said to me, the only thing you’ve posted back to me after my numerous FB messages is “I love you, Zeke.” Do you think that ameliorates every question I’ve put before you?

You deny me the respect of speaking my opinion after thrusting verbal kok down my throat, then slamming the door in my face, so I can’t speak up. Larkin has done the same to me, as have many others. Causing me tremendous frustration, anger and grief. So I’m left to do what…vent myself via FB messaging, never knowing whether or not you even read them? For all I know, you’ve blocked me; or if not, just delete them immediately. Same pattern as Larkin, whose roommate told me he doesn’t even read my letters, just tosses them into the garbage unopen. Very beautiful tales which he’s inspired, some of which you’ve already seen.

When I tried to speak truth to you, you rudely interjected: “That’s /your/ reality, not mine!” Which is simply and purely HOGWASH. For I was speaking about friendship, and your definition of this was way too broad a term to hold any validity. I was explaining UNIVERSAL HUMAN TRUTH that does not vary from one person’s reality to another. I pointed out that you already /have/ solid and true friends via family and other long term associations. I do not. Therefore, it is an easy thing for /you/ to claim many friends in the city after only being here several months.

You can /enjoy/ superficial friendships because you already have a base of /real/ friends to lean on. But in /my/ case, all I’ve ever known are friendly acquaintances who disappear almost as quickly as they appear. Therefore, not having any true friends in my life causes great suffering and isolation for me…when you add up all the /years/ it’s been that way for yours truly. San Francisco is a highly transient city, which exacerbates this lonely situation immensely, especially for low-income people like myself.

I find it curious that when I asked if you’ve read my messages, you made up some faux excuse about how the Facebook app seems to disrupt viewing my posts. While I suggested you switch to a more reliable FB app, “Tinfoil,” I really don’t believe you.


FACEBOOK MESSAGE TO BRASUS – August 20 (later same day)

I noticed your notes on the back porch…very impressive. There has been a lovely tradition in 2306 of leaving nice items on the back porch for others to enjoy. But the last few building managers have pretty much put the kibash on this tradition. You understand what’s going on. Your reprimanding residents for not separating their trash is also spot on. Just because they have money to toss around, does not give them carte blanche to not cooperate in an important ecological movement (which is nothing less than saving this planet).

It is my conclusion there are one or more residents performing acts that make the manager think I’m the culprit. So that he will turn his anger upon yours truly, and get me evicted. Which will, of course, backfire. I just want to say thank you.

YOU HAVE BIG BALLS, BRASUS (and maybe some day I’ll get to lick them all night long).


So today I discover that Brasus has blocked me from his Facebook page, the only way he allowed me to communicate with him other than knocking (or leaving a message) on his door. Guess he can’t take the truth…which I believe I presented in as compassionate a way as possible. I therefore conclude he’s another one of your Castro Clone Losers. Fitting in for the acceptance of Upper Middle Class Queers who control the city, and exclude and spit on the remaining poor who are mostly homeless. With the exception of a few “gracious” benefactors who lavish the street urchins with the occasional jacket, socks, cigerettes, tina and what have you. Such as you, Brasus.

Obviously he has sold out to the many arrogant ciliques abounding the Gay Community here in Sf, and most likely in every liberal city of America if not the world. So now I’m stuck with a possibly aggressive enemy as my next door neighbor (206) right here in 2306 Market Street.

But I signed on with a new Facebook account via another gmail profile. Sure enough, his “page not available” that came up with my standard email, this time around presented the Full Monty. Ergo, the fukker’s shitting all over me. So much for having a kind ally for a neighbor. Silly me to ever expect such a nice thing to ever really occur. So I left him two sticky-notes on his apartment door:




Revision completed, safe to put it up now. Redactions begin right after his photo. It’s not “glowing” praise, but a fairer rendering of Bryan, and the tragedy of our community’s elitism. Here’s an anchor link to take you right to the Bryan Higgins section:

Friend of Bryan:

Not “glowing” but IMO a bazillion times better than what I read that led me to you originally. I hope you don’t mind that I shared a portion of one of your emails on my Facebook page. It was and is extremely comforting to think he didn’t suffer per se. I was talking to his uncle and didn’t have the exact verbiage but sent him the portion I shared and he feels the same. To attempt to explain Bryan’s ‘dismissal’ when you asked his name Bryan was bi-polar and schizophrenic and quite often would go off his meds. You may have caught him during one of those many times. He for the most part handled himself quite well, when he felt he needed to or when he began to go into a manic state he would begin taking his meds again. Not the healthiest way to treat his illness or disorders or whatever you want to call them but he believed in more holistic remedies. So let me attempt to offer you an apology for my ‘adopted’ son. He really was a beautiful creature. Again, thank you so much for the updated blog. I know you didn’t know him, he really wasn’t one to judge, I do indeed like this version much more than the first. And thank you for the kind emails. Much love to you. <3


The outrage you posted to me, is exactly the kind of response I wanted at certain community meetings over Bryan’s murder. Then Detective Kelsey could observe /which/ faces did not emote anger towards my callous accusations…or which faces mimicked outrage in order to blend in. He now has a trail on four people who match the desired “lack” of rage. At least one of them may be a cult member, who can then possibly lead the PD to the proper suspect. For it is my belief (and that of Larkin and several other associates) that this attack was orchestrated by this cult (which I call for want of knowing their /real/ title: Disciples of the Zodiac Killer). They are quite clever and surreptitious, using gossip and emotionally disturbed people on the streets, like puppets totally unaware of their controllers. Thus, the cult gets away with many crimes. SPOILER ALERT: Book 1’s Chapter 13, “The Phone Call,” introduces the reader to the cult: And the reader also learns, for the first time, that Larkin is a detective.


And it may well be that since this cult clocks my every move once outside and strolling the Castro, they witnessed my several friendly conversations with Bryan. The cult drives away, injures or even kills anyone they perceive could become a friend in my life. Thus the possibility that I am an unintentional instrument of his death.

Friend of Bryan:

I would like to think what happened was ‘random’ and that it had nothing to do with anyone in particular except this evil animals cruel nature. Whatever his/their intention may have been. I do intend to respond further, things are chaotic to say the least. And I work 7 days a week. I would prefer to respond via computer rather than my phone. It’s a bit easier. So I will chat with you soon. <3


I don’t own a cell phone, I have an android tablet and a Windoze laptop. But I want to end this conversation on a truly positive note: If I am correct in my understanding of life’s machinations described earlier, which evolved out of meditating for years on the Buddha’s statement: “we have no enemies, only teachers”…then nothing more than an incredible tragicomedy is unfolding in my world, and that of the SF Gay Family. Some play the role of evil, some die after a short appearance, and some my protectors with Larkin at the helm. Therefore:

No one killed Bryan, who is simply one of these actors playing out his chosen role. The entire scenario is exquisitely orchestrated, and for whatever reason are making me the hero of This Gay Soap Opera. It’s been going on for almost a decade now…but it wasn’t till approx’ly 4 years ago that I began to figure out what’s going on. And now that I have, I blog about it, that others may enjoy and grow wise.

This also explains why I am not so grief-struck any more, whenever another tragedy hits our neighborhood like a meteorite. It’s all a game, a beautiful game, which outcome will be unbelievably joyful. Though it may not manifest until just before the last scene plays out and the curtain falls.

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