Force Majeure

June 30, 2015

Date: Sun, 28 Jun 2015 13:22:11
A Desperate Time, A Desperate Measure
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Eleanor Cooney

Besides sending my “Vested Interest” letter to Larkin, I mailed a
signed copy to my brother and requested that he append it to my last
will and testament. But here the plot thickens as I realize what my
next step should be:

I now have many good friends, mostly on the streets, with whom I will share this letter, and make them aware of how Medi-Cal has destroyed any chance of receiving affordable health care (which on my low income should be $0.00). They will then spread my words via their own extended street family…after which time several will approach Larkin outside of Twin Peaks Tavern, and say something like:

“We are aware of Zeke’s difficult situation, your relationship with
him, and your continued harassment towards him. It is time to be a
good friend to him, keep him in good health, and end your wrongful
gossip. We will be watching.”


“Larkin, you have to invite Zeke into the same bars you frequent,
after making it clear to customers and workers alike, that Zeke has
never stalked you.”

At intervals–say, twice per week–they’ll come up to Larkin and ask:

“Have you seen Zeke today?” And if he says no, they’ll persist: “Why not?”

If he doesn’t do what I requested in my letter, my street buddies will
shame him in public and hang around him outside of Twin Peaks or any
other bar, when he steps out for his smoke.

That was just one example of how they can embarrass and annoy him w/o crossing into the illegal. I’m sure they’ll come up with various and effective /other/ schemes all on their own. If Larkin never complies (though I’m sure he will) he’ll wind up being ridiculed out of my neighborhood, where he also resides. He is well connected with rich gay bar owners, patrons and the like…so I’m sure he has access to funding my medical needs.

And goddess forbid I should ever suffer major, debilitating illness,
injury, or death! Can you imagine the wrath that shall befall My
Wonderful Warlock then? I think Larkin will quickly get a clue.

– Zeke

Date: Sun, 28 Jun 2015 13:48:49
Re: 6/26/2015 – A Great Day in History
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Carlyle Lambourne

On Sun, Jun 28, 2015 at 12:08 PM, Carlyle Lambourne wrote:

{{ Yes, this is a great relief and a major life event for all of us. Might be able to die someday with at least a degree of sense of life-mission accomplished. }}

We shall both accomplish great deeds on behalf of LGBT Rights, now
that this albatross has fallen from our necks.

{{ We need to keep momentum on job/housing anti-discrimination parity, and need to turn more attention to fellow gays in more oppressed areas such as Africa, the Islamic world, Russia. I hope that American gays will not become so complacent that they will fail to feel a sense of shared struggle with the rest of the world. }}

Don’t forget that some of us here in the USA remain threatened with an early death, needless suffering and social isolation. For we are low income, and Obamacare has failed to expand Medicaid w/o charging an absurd and cruel monthly share of cost. Mine is $518!!!

Now how do you think I’ll fare in my “golden” years, as I will need
more and more health care. I am denied even preventative aids,
including what’s required to stave off blindness.

– Ezekiel

Date: Sun, 28 Jun 2015 14:49:22
Re: A Desperate Time, A Desperate Measure
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Eleanor Cooney

On Sun, Jun 28, 2015 at 2:28 PM, Eleanor Cooney wrote:

{{ Can you depend on these guys to carry through?? }}

Several, yes…and they have their own friends outside my circle. And
they’d just love to stir things up and make their days less boring and
harsh. These fellows are intelligent, sweet natured, handsome and
(best of all) quite mischievous! But I will tell each of them it’s
just an idea, no one has to comply. I’ll still love them, won’t be
disappointed or angry.

Besides, I’m sure this is exactly how Larkin wants me to retaliate.
He’s playing King of the Hill, challenging me to best him. I think
Larkin will have the time of his life, pretending I successfully
blackmailed him, and he has no other choice but to obey.

Me and Gregory (my newest street pal) had a hilarious encounter
w/Larkin just a few days ago. I plan to write about it soon. Suffice
for now, to say that Greg was sporting my sign (instead of myself)
that said “I am not Larkin’s stalker, I’m his boyfriend,” when Larkin
showed up.

– Zeke

Date: Mon, 29 Jun 2015 10:12:43
The Plot Coagulates
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Eleanor Cooney


Here’s another idea: have all the homeless in The Castro wear the same sign: “I am not Larkin’s stalker, I’m his boyfriend.” Easy enough to accomplish, as cardboard, string and even pens are freely accessible. A group of them congregate daily about Twin Peaks Tavern, one or more of whom is a dedicated ally. I can imagine Larkin arriving one afternoon to witness the street bums lolling about his turf with that sign flung about their necks. Tee-hee, I /am/ a scamp! But I want to make one thing perfectly queer:

If your desire for vengeance is justified (as is mine), you must achieve that /only/ with compassion and humor a la The Buddha’s guidance. And I think I’m doing a pretty damn good job of it! Why /is/ Larkin putting me through all these difficult tests, if indeed his goal is kind rather than hostile? Here’s your answer:

That I may be challenged to always find a loving solution to seemingly-nasty attacks, so that I grow very strong in spirit, to finally crack open life’s concrete like a victorious, brave little sprout. As well as to become a true hero in my own right.

I LOVE ALL THIS BRAINSTORMING! Here comes my next manic high, yippee-doo!

BTW did you view yet, my “Scooby-Doo Porn” page that I printed out and sent to Larkin? It will crack you up.

Vested Interest

June 27, 2015

I have sent the following postcard to Larkin on June 24th, followed by a letter two days later:

June 26. 2015

Dearest Larkin:

When I said in a recent postcard that you have a vested interest in keeping me healthy, etc., what this refers to is: my last will and testament mentions how badly you’ve treated me, and have kicked me out of the local gay bars (by falsely accusing me of being your stalker) which I planned to use to promote my novel, that could result in my book taking off. Then I could (once the money comes rolling in) open my home for severely disabled LGBT veterans, as well as provide you with high quality health care and other good things.

Whether I become desperately ill or injured, or perish as a result, I have arranged that you, Larkin Kelsey, will be noted to the public as a hostile contribution towards my demise. If such should occur, you will end up being the most hated person in the gay community, since Daniel White. No gay bar (or other queer establishment) will allow you to enter their premises.

With much love and sincerity,

Zeke Krahlin

The Pink Flea Bites

June 25, 2015

Date: Wed, 24 Jun 2015 12:19:23
Charleston Church Massacre (a different viewpoint)
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My E-frenz

This image I am posting to various social media, and hopefully the
hands of my allies will spread it further.

Date: Wed, 24 Jun 2015 12:41:51
Re: Charleston Church Massacre (a different viewpoint)
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Eleanor Cooney

On Wed, Jun 24, 2015 at 12:32 PM, Eleanor Cooney wrote:

{{ It would be interesting to look at the actual record on gay issues, rights, etc. for the people killed in the church. I know for a fact that there are lefty, progressive “Christians” (a semantically damaged, useless word, I know) who are strong supporters of LGBT life, freedom, safety. }}

Of course I am fully aware of that. Still, majority of churches remain
solidly anti-LGBT, especially black congregations. And the gay-friendly
religious groups do very little to challenge the evil ones.

{{ Whether this congregation was one of those I don’t know. Black churches tend to be depressingly conservative on such issues, I’m aware, but you raise an interesting question and it might actually be possible to find out where the Rev, at the very least, stood. }}

“Conservative” is way too kind a word…BRUTAL is more the truth.

The Emanuel AME Church (there in Charleston) is part of the umbrella
group: African Methodist Episcopal Church. Which group is definitely against gay equality. Quote:

Earlier in the year, before marriage became legal for same-sex couples
in Massachusetts, the Rev. Gregory G. Groover Sr., an AME pastor in
Boston, explained why AME preachers opposed the move. He was quoted in
the Boston Globe on Feb. 10, 2004, as saying:

“As black preachers, we are progressive in our social consciousness
and in our political ideology as an oppressed people we will often be
against the status quo, but our first call is to hear the voice of God
in our Scriptures, and where an issue clearly contradicts our
understanding of Scripture, we have to apply that understanding.”

See the article here:

So whatever is the policy of the African Methodist Episcopal Church,
is also the policy of the Emanuel outpost.

I refuse to have /any/ sympathy whatsoever, for /any/ group that
spreads homophobia, whether they do so aggressively or with the subtleness
of the snake from the Garden.

– Zeke

Date: Wed, 24 Jun 2015 14:57:47
Re: Charleston Church Massacre (a different viewpoint)
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Eleanor Cooney

On Wed, Jun 24, 2015 at 1:11 PM, Eleanor Cooney wrote:

{{ Yep, I can dig it. I’d bet my left nut (if I had one) }}

Why not phrase it “I’d bet my left ovary”? I often do that myself!

{{ that Dylan Roof hates queers, too…. }}

May even be queer himself.

{{ it so often goes along with the White Supremacist mentality, in a pathologically repressed, psychotic-closet-case sort of way….like = the S.S. tier of the Nazis back in the day. }}

Per my claim of many years now–that homophobia is the root of all
violence including war–the nature and level of anti-LGBT bigotry can
be a red flag for one who may become insanely violent. The gov’t
should build a list of aggressive homophobes and their organizations.
Ignoring the homophobic aspect as a key indicator of potential treason
is a big mistake, but exists in many so-called progressives…thus it
puts up blinders from seeing things clearly. But it looks like those
blinders are dropping post haste, as these RW nut jobs expose
themselves to the world by their own irrational condemnation and
persecution of queers. On a related note:

As of 2:54 PM today, 108 Facebook users like my comment re. that article “California judge agrees to dismiss proposed ‘shoot the gay’ ballot initiative.” Now, this is a breakthrough for I have never received more than two or three likes on /any/ of my comments previous (and usually, zero)! I am hoping this will lead to more interest by a growing number of folks, as to my ideas and writing. The link to my favored comment is:

Though I’m not certain that URL will work for anyone but myself, due
to FB’s internalized system. So I’ve attached two images that show you
what the link shows me. You’ll see that, as an afterthought, I also
posted my “pink flea” declaration. Let’s see the reactions I get, if

– Zeke


From: Carlyle Lambourne
To: Zeke Krahlin
RE: Charleston Church Massacre (a different viewpoint)
Date: Wed, 24 Jun 2015 20:23:18


Sounds like this particular church was a friend, not one of the bad ones, which might have been one of the very reasons why the racist killer chose it. I think that he also chose it very intentionally because Clementa Pinckney was both a friend of Obama and was working for the campaign of Hillary Clinton. Which makes me suspect that the GOP’s partisan-motivated hate-propaganda machine and its 24/7. around-the-clock smear campaign to whip up hatred against Obama in every way possible had something to do with
the genesis of this event.

The Slaying of Charleston Leader Clementa Pinckney Hits Gay Rights Advocates Hard

As South Carolina gay rights advocate Jeff Ayres lobbied lawmakers earlier this year to stop a wave of anti-gay bills in the statehouse, hewent to speak with state Sen. Clementa Pinckney, the charismatic legislator and church pastor slain alongside eight other congregants in last week’s racially motivated mass shooting.

“He gave me his assurance then that he was on our side,” says Ayres, the chairman of South Carolina Equality. The South Carolina Legislative Black Caucus, of which Pinckney was a member, “always has our backs, and has always been there unconditionally to support the LGBT community,”Ayres told me in an interview, echoing sentiments from other gay rights advocates and two lawmakers who worked with Pinckney.

Happy Father Fucker’s Day

June 20, 2015

I enjoy any holiday–no matter how irrelevant to our friendship–as an excuse to present My Beloved Dragon Guardian (Larkin), with a gift. Seeing as he is obviously the “Daddy” type, I find Father’s Day a most appropriate time to celebrate his presence in my life…though I am 12 years his senior. Has nothing to do with the defunct theory that a boy turns gay due to lack of fatherly attention. He is very tall (6-foot-4), handsome, masculine, and always wants to run the show no matter the situation.

It took me some time to come up with the right gift, but I have recently been reintroduced to that great comedy troupe, The Firesign Theatre. Their inspiration is based on the radio media of the 30’s and 40’s, though they take it to surrealistic heights. Their star rose rapidly in the 60’s and 70’s, though they are still going strong (God bless ’em). So I ordered one of their CD’s from Amazon, entitled “I Think We’re All Bozos on this Bus.”

The CD arrived just five days before the holiday, so I had to do some quick thinking on how to create the total package. So I ambled on down to Walgreens and selected a diminutive pink gift bag, along with a small greeting card (which was blank inside, and displayed a picture on the front of a juicy hamburger with caption “Nice buns!”). Inside I wrote the following words:

“Wishing you the loveliest Father’s Day ever.” And signed it: “Your psycho ex-boyfriend, Zeke.”

I embellished the gift bag with a Scooby-Doo sticker, and did something similar to the front of the card’s envelope. Then I printed out the first two pages of Wikipedia’s article on The Firesign Theatre, and folded it to quarter size, just in case he isn’t familiar with this group.

Don’t know if Firesign Theatre is his cup of tea; nonetheless I think it’s a very nice gift to present to someone I love, who means the universe to me. Then I opened the gift bag and plunked the CD, greeting card and printout into it. The love token was now complete and ready to hand deliver to Larkin at Twin Peaks Tavern, or perhaps elsewhere. But if worse leads to worst, and Father’s Day comes and goes without me seeing him, I’ll simply mail it belatedly.

The statement “Happy Father Fucker’s Day” is in reference to a joke he cracked about two years ago, when I came up to him as he departed Twin Peaks Tavern, and declared:

“You’re the handsomest mother fucker on the planet!”

To which he replied: “I’m not a mother fucker, I’m a father fucker!”

The image with caption I printed out and taped to the gift bag is probably too small for you to clearly discern, so right below is a larger version. I think it’s quite funny, and you probably will too.

Scooby-Doo Porn

June 17, 2015


If you are underage, or in any way forbidden by your government or religious laws from viewing X-rated subject matter, please do not go there. If, however, you are not restricted by any laws in your geographical location, by all means click on the image above, to read my salty tale.

Postcards in May

June 4, 2015

[ Brachiocephalic Reader: this latest salvo of postcards to Larkin were all sent out in the month of May 2015. Seven in all. Just use your browser’s “enlarge page” command for a better read. ]

Sent May 18th:

The following four postcards were mailed on the same date, May 24th (please forgive the typos in the Tweety Bird card):

And these last two postcards were sent on the 31st:

[ Then at the last moment I decided to post him the following letter June 1st. In hopes of shocking him into some sort of sane realization…though my great expectations are pretty much dashed at this point. His housemate Zachary is quite a boring plain-Jane with no talent or bright spirit whatsoever; I am just being facetious. ].

Dear ex-friend Larkin,

You’re just another piece of self-centered Castro Clone shit. Guess you think you had to become like that, in order to fit in. Zachary is such a handsome, intelligent and fun-loving fellow, I’m certainly no match! My apologies for ever intruding in your life; I am just a homely old faggot whose dreams were bigger than his stomach.

Thanks for the ride, though: it’s more than I ever expected in my entire life. Guess I’ll send another salvo of postcards to the gay bars, just for the heck of it. For in truth: all’s fair in love and war and Castro Street tackiness.

Ever hear the term “Pyrrhic victory?” Look it up, ’cause it’s yours.

More sincerely than you could ever imagine,

Ezekiel J. Krahlin


May 29, 2015


If you are underage, or in any way forbidden by your government or religious laws from viewing X-rated subject matter, please do not go there. If, however, you are not restricted by any laws in your geographical location, by all means click on the image sabove, to read my salty tale.


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