Mendocino County’s Own “I Hate Zeke” Fan Club

February 7, 2021

In February of 2019, Marco McClean, radio host of “Memo of the Air” in Mendocino County, discussed my controversial presence on the MCN listserv, describing it as a witch hunt. They may be the first “I Hate Zeke” fan club, but I’m sure many millions will very soon follow! Animosity towards yours truly is bound to go global, as my star rises later this year, in one, ginormous gay whirlwind of hetero outrage!

Please note that Marco is incorrect about some things he’s described about me, such as my health (which is excellent, not bad at all), and I was born in New York, not New Jersey. And I DON’T have a history of deluging chat groups with my comments. MCN (Mendocino Community Network) is the one exception. Besides, I don’t do chat, I do mailing lists (such as MCN’s), forums and social media. I ABHOR chat rooms, they are tedious and a big waste of time, in my opinion. Nor do I have scads of friends all around the planet…in fact, I have only four, maybe five, and all of them are online allies whom I’ve never met face to face, but for one. As for any SECRET admirers, I’m sure they now number well over a billion. At least, that’s what the I Ching coins tell me. :P

And I stopped calling in mainly because I felt spooky-weird after my call was over, returning to the dark of night in my personal reality of living alone in this world in a crappy SRO…which calling in to a radio station only served to stamp that harsh reality more solidly into my heart, by contrast. Things have since improved for me in that aspect, and a few weeks ago I emailed him with an offer to resume my call-ins. But Marco hasn’t bothered to respond to any of my several recent posts. So I have NO idea what’s up with that! For a little while–from late December to mid-January–he’s resumed narrating my latest tales, but that seems to have come to a halt, as well. Honestly, I’m stymied.


Zeke-Response Bot: an Algorithm Whose Time has Come

January 24, 2021

[Something from back in November that I almost forgot to post to my WordPress blog. Note: the person I called “Tara Roosevelt” for several months, is the same person I now call “My Dear Wattson.” Who IS this woman? That may not be revealed until Brindlekin Tales becomes the all-time bestseller in the whole of anthropoid history, and brings the world to its knees! Which I predict will occur some time later this year.]


Subject: You need a Zeke-Response Bot, Tara!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Tara Roosevelt
Date: November 7, 2021 11:13 AM

I’m serious about this (or not)…as the type of AI I’m talking about is a rather low-IQ version, so to speak. IOW, it’s a very basic form of artificial intelligence (thus, much smarter than Donald Trump; goes without saying). And its sole purpose would be to respond to each and every one of my plethora of emails that I’m streaming to you these days, like a gushing fire hose out of control…which you really have NO time to read, except one here and there. All this Zeke-Response Bot needs is a small database of stock replies. Which one of those replies it chooses will be based on key words and phrases in my latest missive. Determined by a simple algorithm that already has access to a collection of my key words and phrases harvested from all my blog entries containing either the word “[your real first name],” “[your most common real nickname],” “[your real surname]” or “Tara Roosevelt.” Examples of stock replies would be:

  • “Wowee!”
  • “You’re on a roll!”
  • “Ha! Good one.”
  • “I hope he comes around.”
  • “I hope he comes around for your sake.”
  • “I hope he comes around for the doggies’ sake.”
  • “I hope he comes around for your sake AND the doggies’.”
  • “I hope he comes around for his own sake, as well as yours and the doggies’.”
  • “I’m sorry you’re going through that.”
  • “Wise decision, though heartbreaking.”
  • “I trust you know what you’re doing.”
  • “No, I don’t mind if you use my real name.”
  • “No, I’d rather you use a pseudonym.”
  • “Anyone who harms a dog should be executed.”
  • “Anyone who harms a dog should be drawn and quartered.”
  • “Anyone who harms a dog should have their skin flayed and fed to that same dog.”
  • “Anyone who harms a dog should be pierced with sewing needles from head to foot, then locked in a cage and fed to army ants live on Zoom.”
  • “Ouch!”
  • “I admire Eleanor Roosevelt.”
  • “I worship the cat.”
  • “Surely is the best little doggy he could possibly be.”
  • “I’m swamped in work right now, but I’ll get around to it.”
  • “I’m really busy these days, but I moved your latest post into my ‘don’t forget to read this’ folder.
  • “I don’t have time to read it now.”
  • “I don’t have time to read it now, but will when I have a moment.”
  • “I don’t have time to read it now, but will when I have a moment or three.”
  • “What a ditz! He doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”
  • “What a ditz! She doesn’t know what she’s talking about.”
  • “What a bunch of ditzes! They don’t know what they’re talking about.”
  • “I’m immersed in writing my next book.”
  • “I’m immersed in writing my next book, which is a mystery novel.”
  • “I’m immersed in writing my next book, which is a mystery novel that is quite scary.”
  • “I’m immersed in writing my next book, which is a mystery novel that is quite scary, and based on historical events.”
  • “I’m immersed in writing my next book, which is a mystery novel that is quite scary, and based on historical events around Ed Gein.”
  • “I guess that’s just the way the cookie crumbles.”
  • “I consider myself agnostic.”
  • “We are all prisoners to the cold laws of physics.”
  • “We are all prisoners to the cold, impersonal and ruthless laws of physics.”
  • “We are all prisoners to the cold, impersonal and ruthless laws of physics, and time engulfs us all into eternity’s mindless abyss.”
  • “I have to drive him there myself.”
  • “I hope they publish it.”
  • “I hope they publish it, you’re an excellent author.”
  • “I hope they publish it, you’re an excellent author who deserves much recognition.”
  • “I hope they publish it, you’re an excellent author who deserves much recognition and worldwide kudos.”
  • “I never get on airplanes or jets; I dread the very idea of it.”
  • “Don’t worry, that maniac serial killer is way over in another part of our huge county.”
  • “You’re right.”
  • “Keep up the good work.”
  • “Keep up the good work. He’ll come around eventually.”
  • “Keep up the good work. They’ll come around eventually.”
  • “Keep up the good work. I believe in you.”
  • “Keep up the good work. I believe in you, even if no one else does.”
  • “He’s my hero.”
  • “She’s my hero.”
  • “You’re my hero.”
  • “I hardly ever see Anthony any more.”
  • “I hardly ever see Anthony any more, but last time I did, he looked awful.”
  • “That’s very sad.”
  • “I couldn’t be happier for you.”
  • “I can send you some money.”

And so on. The idea is that you would be freed up from any sense of obligation to respond to me in a timely manner. Yet having your kind attention in support of my writing–and you yourself already quite an accomplished author–inspires me to compose my incredible tales, essays and (sometimes) poetry…by first sending a draft to you. And all it takes on YOUR part, is no more than the briefest of nods, and I’m off to the races! Thus an AI could handle such replies posthaste and, BEST OF ALL, I wouldn’t know the difference.

Hmm, wait-a-minute…maybe you’ve BEEN using such a bot all along, at least soon after I began my flurry of urgent missives in early November! Which explains the sharp increase of terse comebacks from your end of the line. Ha-ha, very good, ya got me there. In sum:

Never mind. :)

  • Zeke

Re: You need a Zeke-Response Bot, Tara!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Tara Roosevelt
Date: November 7, 2021 1:03 PM

I’m doing the best I can. The truth is that I’m under huge pressure on several different fronts. My survival is at stake, and that’s not an exaggeration. I’m no Lady of Leisure up here, serene, cloistered and financially secure. The details are unimportant. You just gotta take my word for it. When you get a short answer from me, you can be assured that I’ve actually read the message…

Oh, I was just playing with ya, Tara…didn’t at all expect a serious reply back. I was hoping for some kind of hilarious retort. SO sorry to hear about your present, and horrid, crisis! Obviously, I cannot provide you with a monetary boost, though I wish I could. Unless some financial kickback soon arrives by some unexpected miracle, such as a publishing company crawling all over me, to make a lucrative contract for my Brindlekin Tales. Then again, maybe cash is not what is needed for your present demise. No details asked, just my prayers of a benevolent outcome in your direction. ASAP

I’m actually having a serious emergency myself, right now…and will post it to you within minutes. The heading will include “URGENT” in all caps.

  • Zeke

Re: You need a Zeke-Response Bot, Tara!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Tara Roosevelt
Date: November 8, 2021 10:41 AM

Money is a component, but not the sole one. My only way out of this situation is through hard, inspired work. No hope of that unless I get plenty of good sleep. Sort of a Catch-22.

Hard, inspired work is right up your alley, Tara…so that’s not the real problem, I’m guessing. Which leaves us with the sleep issue. Which I find unusual, as you seem to be fine with listening to those “Sleep With Me” videos, and then you’re off to dreamland. Something else is disrupting your sleep, which I hope you can discover and resolve…or if you already know its source, that you can resolve ASAP. I don’t think there’s anything I can do for you, except stop posting for awhile, so you may focus on your writing. But if there IS something that you think I can do, just say the word!


Re: You need a Zeke-Response Bot, Tara!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Tara Roosevelt
Date: November 8, 2021 10:49 AM

No need to stop posting. My sleep has improved hugely, thanks to SWM; I’d have been a jibbering basket case without him. But it’s still a struggle. If I’m even slightly sleep-deprived–and I need a solid nine hours at the very least–then I’m defeated, weary, ill, disgusted and useless.

I don’t envy such a level of sensitivity to one’s sleep needs! That truly sucks. I have no idea who SWM is, except “single white male.” :D

Oh, wait, you mean the “Sleep with Me” podcasts…great stuff! Great fluffy stuff, that is!


Re: You need a Zeke-Response Bot, Tara!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Tara Roosevelt
Date: November 8, 2021 12:16 PM

Yes, it’s a curse. I know people who can roll out of bed after six hours and be all chipper and bushy-tailed. Not me, alas. So sleep is, for me, the foundation of anything and everything I hope to be or accomplish. Only oxygen is more important.

I’ve suffered decades of harsh insomnia, but it wasn’t anywhere as near as much of a problem for someone who needed to work for a living. Having these doggies around has made my mornings chipper; I have no choice but to hop out of bed by 7:30 AM so they can go poop! And they are always such joyful little angels to wake up to. However, I do not have the usual comfort of sleeping in my cot which, though wider than standard (for cots), it’s narrower than even a twin-size bed…plus I gotta share it now with two pups! Surprisingly, I’m adapting well, despite having only a slice of the cot for myself.

I’m sure you’ve tried everything under the sun, including Sominex, so I won’t bother to try to play the helping angel. May this bizarre power that has only recently come to me, grant you a most excellent sleep each and every day, from now on!

  • Zeke

Re: You need a Zeke-Response Bot, Tara!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Tara Roosevelt
Date: November 8, 2021 12:51 PM

My goal has been to sleep drug-free, which I’ve accomplished (about 98% of the time), thanks to the podcast and CBD. So sometimes I wind up underslept because I don’t want to take a pill. But your powers may already be coming through on my behalf: Slept a solid nine-plus hours last night. Raveled sleeve of care knit up, etc.

Many good folks have informed me that they just love curling up in bed with my novel, “Free Me From This Bond,” because it puts them to sleep in the shake of a lamb’s tail! Have you tried that yet? I’m here for you, no matter what! No doubt as I rise to fame, my archrivals shall erect large billboards, and purchase whole newspaper and magazine pages, radio and TV blurbs, and computer virus versions of Internet pop-ups and memes that declare:

EZEKIEL J. KRAHLIN’S TALES (ANY ONE OF THEM, TAKE YOUR PICK): EVERYMAN’S CURE FOR INSOMNIA!

  • Zeke

Re: You need a Zeke-Response Bot, Tara!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Tara Roosevelt
Date: November 8, 2021 3:35 PM

Your writing is the opposite of sleep-inducing! It’s verbal No-Doz!

Aha, so I have something in common with one of my favorite comic book characters:

https://www.gocomics.com/toomuchcoffeeman

Well, you’ll be excited to know that my next chapter (21) of Brindlekin Tales will be about where I live, and called “This is My Room, God Help Me.” I’ve already uploaded a brief video tour, which you can watch here:

Be sure to read the accompanying blurb below it.

The chapter itself will include 15 pics, along with the video, with lengthy descriptions of select items shown in each photo, and the history behind some of them. I will structure my SRO tale such that it will be perfectly readable withOUT having to actually view the pictures or the video. (Keeping Marshall in mind, here.) Barring any unforeseen drama (a.k.a. “Deek”) I should complete this chapter later in the day, or perhaps tomorrow. I think it will be a valuable aspect of my history as a struggling author and philosopher…that admirers may see my humble living/workspace before I conquer the planet, along with the solar system and our galaxy plus 18 neighboring ones, as well as a plethora of yet undiscovered, wandering, vagrant black holes.

  • Zeke

Letter to the Landlord (part 2)

January 22, 2021

Subject: Surprising Twist on the Ablahblah Realty Case!
From: Detective Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 18, 2021 4:09 PM

You need to see this, Wattson:

Friendly Ghost Detective Agency (FGDA) has never been up against such a devious opponent! I’d suspect Moriarty’s ghost, but he’s all wrapped up in planning this year’s LGBT celebration in Phantomburg as the Grand Unholy Duchess…and he’s too much of a narcissist to just drop all that ectoplasmic fame and glory, to hatch another scheme that may or may not GLOW anywhere. So, whadda YOU think? Who do YOU conjecture may be behind this, my dear Wattson?

Should I resend it or not? What say you, Wattson? After all, my letter seems to have resulted in the desired impact, by reaching the two suspects in time. However, further down the line, I may NEED proof of informing the property owner, should some unexpected plasma bubble over into homo sapiens’ Reality Bubble. At any rate:

I may have already saved a life or two, perhaps more, by taking the intangible approach, rather than abiding by the Law of the Physical Land. And for that, I’m rather proud.

  • Ezekiel J. Krahlin, paranormal gumshoe extraordinaire

Re: URGENT: Adisa just threatened me!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 20, 2021 7:20 PM

This happened around 7:15 PM. A few minutes earlier his mom, Myrtle Haversak, knocked on my door, and she said she got my letter, and is very disappointed that I reported this to Ablahblah Realty, that it seems to be a threat to have her and her son kicked out. She made up all kinds of excuses like she works all day, can’t watch her son all the time…that as far as she knows, they stopped having her friends come over months ago…that the manager had spoken with her a few days back…blah, blah, blah.

I made it clear that, as the adult, she is nonetheless responsible. I had already talked to her twice, as well as to the manager, but their hanging out in the hallway, unmasked, continued. Then she said I made it sound like they’re doing this every week, blah, blah, blah.

I stayed perfectly calm through the whole conversation. Five or so minutes after she departed, she returned with her son. He claimed my accusation is fucked up, that none of his friends are doing that, they must be other people. I said, no, they were definitely his friends, the same ones who’ve always been hanging out in the hallway since day 1.

He said next time, talk to him like a man. I said I just did. And what I did is NOT fucked up, it’s to protect the residents from exposure to the coronavirus. That is the gist of it, but as they walked down the hallway to their apartment, he again said I’m fucked up, so I called to him:

“Don’t set me up!”

He hollered back (from around the corner): “What? What did you just say?”

So I repeated: “Don’t set me up!”

Then he said he oughta punch me in the face (not in my view, but within earshot and around the corner by their apartment) so I called back:

“DON’T threaten me!”

I heard his mom beg him to please stop that talk, and then they closed the door behind them.

What I think, no, what I KNOW (or conclude), is he’s lying…and his mom is not aware he’s been sneaking them in without her knowledge.

Adisa also said why didn’t I take any pictures of them? Well, you know as well as I do, that he’s trying to cover his tracks. So I stated:

“Obviously, I don’t want any confrontations with them.”

But he knows very well that’s why I have no photos…the lying scumbag1

He also said if it happens again, just knock on their door, and they’ll see who they are. What nonsense! He’ll pretend he doesn’t know them, per agreement with his friends to likewise say they don’t know HIM. And I will then be a target from at least SEVERAL punks who Adisa lets inside the building while his mother is at work. Talk about bogus!

After leaving a message with Kevin, that Adisa threatened me, I dialed 911 (which I told him I would do):

“I don’t know if this is a 911 priority, but a neighbor down the hallway just threatened to beat me up.”

He said it is, so I provided the details…and he said to stay inside, till they arrive. And they will speak both with me, and with them.

Just earlier today, I thought they wouldn’t get my letter, as I used the same postage on it, as I did for the property owner…which letter was returned to my mailbox today, because of insufficient postage. So I figured THEIR letters would also be returned.

SO glad I have a working phone again, right? Now, I have to stand firm against this, come hell or high water. I HOPE they are forced to leave the place immediately. However, I have no PROOF of my claims…so that’s a real problem.

So I guess I should send that letter out to Ablahblah Realty again…this time with TWO stamps…no, three, just to be on the safest side possible. Wait I just checked: I only have two stamps left, ha-ha…just enough to get the job done.

With Adisa’s belligerent attitude, I’m sure his mother has second thoughts as to whether or not he’s telling the truth. I just wish the cops would get here soon, so I can take the doggies for their evening walk.

I think the fates are setting me up for a big, fat lawsuit against the property owners, as well as the manager and Myrtle and son. The fact that she DID allow them over to hang in the hallways originally, with the manager agreeing to it, and witnessing it…is already a serious offense, COVID-wise. But also trespassing and noise disturbance.

  • Zeke

Re: URGENT: Adisa just threatened me!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 18, 2021 8:30 PM

UPDATE

The cops still haven’t shown up, and an hour has passed. So I decided to take the dogs out, anyway, but stay near the building. I figured that, seeing as Adisa and mom were in their apartment, there would be no confrontation. So I hitched up the mutts and proceeded to exit the gate, when I saw a homeless man parked so close to the left half of the gate (the one that opens), that Flaco & Lucky barked up a hurricane, and I had to ask him to please move away from the gate. He did, but took his time.

During that time, guess who shows up. Yep, ya got it: Adisa. I think he was returning from a corner store or something like that…maybe Walgreens. Well, he gave me the stink eye you wouldn’t believe! Like I’m supposed to be intimidated because I’m white, old and on the small side…gimme a fuckin’ break! Playing the black stereotype to the hilt, I concluded…seeing as he ALSO plays basketball at Duboce Park, noisily bouncing it along the sidewalk late at night, to and fro, before and after, between midnight and 1 AM.

But he spoke not a word, which I presume is per his parent’s instruction. I didn’t either, of course. Well, after I stepped out and walked about thirty feet, I turned around to see where that homeless guy went: I didn’t see him anywhere! So I approached the front gate and, sure enough, he was standing in the lobby, checking out some junk mail left on the glass table there, pretending he’s a resident. Well don’t that beat all:

Adisa him in!

I’m gonna report THAT to the building manager, too, as he can check the video recording. So this is yet another bodhisattva challenge…I’m sure they set it all up: Myrtle and the manager, and Adisa. I’m barely disturbed at all, ’cause I know everything will be fine, and everything will fall in my favor soon enough.

But I forgot to drop that returned letter back into the mailbox, when I stepped out with the brindlemutts. Oh, well, I won’t forget next time, about three hours from now.

  • Zeke

P.S.: Isn’t it funny that they think Ablahblah Realty has already gotten their letter? I was tempted to tell her they didn’t, but I thought: hmm, that’s a powerful card in the deck, and it’s in my hand, so…DON’T GIVE IT AWAY! Besides, they’ll get it soon enough, plus I’m gonna call them up first thing in the morning, so they’ll know what horrible crap is going on against me. Basically, this is all a karmic culmination of the manager (and all those who came before him), many residents, and the property owners themselves, for treating low income people such as myself, like peons. So I move forward in calm and joy, no hatred, fear or other childish emotion. Glad I got the dogs, though!


Re: URGENT: Adisa just threatened me!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 20, 2021 10:02 PM

SECOND UPDATE

Cops came, I got excellent results. Couple a fuckin’ handsome dudes, I should add. Very courteous, they listened careful to what I said came down, including my sending that letter to the mother, the manager, and the landlord…which led to this altercation. They asked how am I, and I said, well I’m not scared, just pissed. Then they asked how I’d like them to handle this, should they knock on their door?

I said yes, they need to know I won’t be intimidated, and your appearance would have that impact. So they told me to wait in my room, and they’ll come back after speaking with them, and tell me what happened. They DID add that, if they don’t answer the door, there’s nothing else they can do. I said that’s fine, you can only do your best within the legal limits. And thanks for showing up.

The doggies were amazingly quiet through it all, BTW. What angels I have in my life!

Upon their return, they told me that they spoke with them, and the son definitely was a bit out of control and belligerent. Ha! Score 1 for me! My reply?

“Well, officers, every mother wants to believe her son. Hopefully this is a wakeup call to get him off the wrong path. And I’m glad to help her out.”

So, they gave me the CAD number on a tiny form, so I can file my complaint…along with one officer’s name and badge number. See for yourself:

I will also post that link to the building manager…that should get the steam shooting out those waxy ears! He should hear me a lot more clearly after THAT cleansing.

Just for the record (as these emails to you are my documentation) the CAD number is:

210203159

Officer’s last name is:

Dyer

Badge number is:

1382 or 1352

I still think it’s peculiar that Myrtle’s letter got through, but not Ablahblah Realty’s. And what about Kevin, did he get the letter, too, or will it show up in my mailbox tomorrow? I sure wish my loyal advisor, Pterry Pterodactyl, would come back and tell me, as well as give me a few more tips. After all, she DID say such an altercation would NOT happen. In fact, when I opened the door a second time, to see Adisa with his mother, I foolishly believed he was about to apologize, as Pterry SAID he would!

Oh, well, this is how the Battle of the Bodhisattvas is played: with many unexpected twists and turns, depending on the draw of the card, which squares your pieces are on, and whether or not your opponent has a hemorrhoid flareup in the middle of the game. (Yes, there’s even a card for that.)

So, while I was awaiting the charming gendarmes’ arrival, and walking the dogs, upon my return I saw an elongated box addressed to me. Well, actually I noticed it before stepping out, and figured to take it up to my hovel when I got back inside. Sure glad that vagrant in the lobby didn’t run off with it!

Turned out to be the first of two kid’s sleeping bags I had ordered through my GoFundMe account. The dogs were delighted to have so much extra fluff to play around in! Lucky got instantly busy grabbing parts of it between his little teeth, in order to arrange it just so, before finally snuggling down. Flaco just happily plunked herself right onto it, and I folded a corner of the bag over her, and tucked her in. Well, they have aNOTHER suprise awaiting them and coming some, possibly tomorrow: a SECOND sleeping bag! They’re gonna have so much fluff, they won’t know what to do with it all.

This is Inspector Krahlin, Head of the Friendly Ghost Detective Agency, signing off now, after sending you my latest update to a most convoluted case that remains open for Yog-Sothoth only knows HOW long. Oh, one more thing:

Here is the opening part for chapter 1 of Friendly Ghost Detective Agency (I’m sure you’ll love it):

While waiting upon Wattson’s text in order to set up a new strategy for a case we both thought closed, but has unexpectedly reopened like Pandora’s jar, I donned my cape and queerstalker cap, and took the brindlekin out for another teleported stroll along the Thames. When we returned I sent the mutts to the downstairs scullery for their evening repast of lamb and quail mash on a small pile of bone-shaped cookies, and retired to the sitting room, where awaiting me was a piping hot pot of Darjeeling, and my trusty, blackened clay pipe that has seen me through years of deliciously delirious cocaine addiction (and continues to do so to this very day), resting on the letter table beside my chair, and freshly tamped with Bird’s Eye shag (a favored leaf blend of Wattson’s BTW…and which indicated that Mrs. Hudnut, my robotic housekeeper, had already been informed on her own 5G link-up that my confidante extraordinaire was due to arrive shortly).

After inhaling a few, prime puffs of the shag, I decided to inject a line of my “silver bullet” to make this evening special…and almost immediately upon the surge of tainted blood to my brain, my trusted other-worldly messenger, a female pterodactyl from Nebula Mesozoa, appeared and sat on the floor beside me, on a plump, rust colored satin pillow.

“Aha, we meet once again, Detective Krahlin-Holmes!” she gleefully addressed me with wings partly aflutter in anticipation of a new and exciting case to whet her cerebral appetite. “By all means, please proceed with introducing me to the rough details of your latest high imbroglio!”

I withdrew my clay pipe from between my lips with a frown: “I beg pardon, Pterry, but I do NOT have imbroglios, I have case studies, some so renowned as to catch the attention and admiration of Her Royal Majesty Queen Victoria, herself! Besides, we have to wait until Wattson arrives, which is momentarily, if that carriage which just halted below this window contains his form.”

The phantom pteranodon cackled and wheezed in hilarity: “Surely her majesty’s ghost, who’s been dead as a chamber pot since 1901, is so bored out of her cranium in that dank Royal Mausoleum in Frogmore, even the croak of a frog would bring some relief, let alone your pointless exploits in the wilds of a virtual reality London!”

But before the royal ghost of Queen Victoria could get a word in edgewise (she had promptly shown up the moment her name was spoken), a baritone “Ahem!” broke our possessed reverie, and we turned to see a familiar and beloved figure standing between sitting room and foyer, luminously framed in the background by the gentle flickering of a gaslight-simulating LED sconce.

“Oh, is that your spectral, overhyped BAT from the dinosaur realms you’re talking to, again, Krahlin-Holmes?” queried Wattson in a mocking tone. “For once I’d like to get a glimpse of her, so I’d know for certain you’re not making this all up!”

“You can if you try some of this, my dear Wattbulb!” I effused with a welcome gesture that he seat himself down, so we may thusly begin deliberations anew on what should be by now, a closed case.

But Wattson turned down my offer of a clean syringe filled with that shimmering nectar I so often crave, with a wave of his Boer War III walking cane gifted to him by his commanding avatar officer upon being furloughed back home to his beloved, simulated Merry Olde England (brought to you by Disney Interplanetary Vacation Modulators, Inc.). Such prized canes are rare among the digital denizens of Level 188 on Planet Earth version 32.014. In fact, barely a handful of the septillion-and-a-half people there have even SEEN the shrunken head of an African prince, which is what lay firmly glued atop every such cane! (Though they’ve seen the fake ones from Wallymart…everyone has. In fact, the collapsible versions are this year’s Brindlefest stocking-stuffer rage.)

“And please stop calling me that, Krahlin-Holmes!” grumbled Dr. Wattson, once he was comfortably seated. “My surname is proudly proclaimed as ‘the son of Watt,’ the greatest inventor of the eighteenth century, and I dare say of the twenty-first century as well, when you consider all that his eighteen DNA replicas have already accomplished!”

“Oh come, come, my very dear Wattson,” I politely countered, “What’s a little poke in the ribs between BFFs?”

“Humph, well I suppose you’re right,” muttered Wattson after belatedly partaking of his first sip of Darjeeling, that by now had turned lukewarm. He then raised his head from the teacup to look around, “I say, old chap, where’s Mrs. Hudnut right now? It’s uncommon for her to neglect replacing a cold pot with a freshly brewed one, in short order!”

(To be continued…)

  • Zeke

Subject: So here is my update, for your records
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Kevin Bond, building manager
Date: January 20, 2021 11:55 PM

This is the form note one of the two cops handed me, after they spoke with Ms. Haversak and her son, which includes the CAD (case number), officer’s name, and his badge number.

I will file a report tomorrow, about Adisa’s threat, at the SFPD Mission Station, as well as directly phone Ablahblah Realty.

FYI, one of the cops said Adisa’s behavior seemed a bit out of control, and belligerent. Now, I’m gonna have to waste MORE time tracking down a decent attorney who will take my case pro bono…when I’d much rather be writing very important stories that will be MOST beneficial and inspiring to many folks, but especially the LGBT community both here and abroad. As well as provide me with a good income for the first time in my life. I will NOT allow bullshit like this get in my path, even if you, as manager, choose to look the other way. NO ONE has a right to threaten me, harass me, or in other ways make a disturbance right outside my door, whenever they so well please. But worse than that: PUTTING MY LIFE AT RISK BECAUSE THEY REFUSE TO WEAR A MASK.

BTW, as I stepped outside around 8:30 PM to walk the doggies, there was what seemed to be a homeless man crouched so close to the side of the gate that opens, I had to insist he move away so I and the dogs could step out w/o a lot of barking. He did so, finally, and as I exited, Adisa stepped in while giving me the biggest stink eye you could ever imagine. After I walked 30 or so steps, I turned around to see where that homeless man went…but he was nowhere to be seen. So I returned to the front gate and, lo and behold, there he was hanging out in the lobby. IOW: Adisa had let him in.

  • Zeke

Subject: So here’s my plan regarding Adisa et al:
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 21, 2021 11:15 AM

Based on the Buddhist philosophy that one must resolve a conflict in the most benevolent way possible, I will push for Ablahblah Realty to move them to a 2-bedroom cottage or similar structure, with a backyard or garage or other space, where they can have his friends over in a covid-safe environment, withOUT putting neighbors at risk. And charge Myrtle HALF the price in rent, to what she’s already paying. Considering the severity of the offense (risking exposure to the virus, to various and sundry residents), I think Ablahblah just may go for it…under condition that I sign a binding agreement that I would be satisfied with such a resolution, and will NOT proceed with pressing any further charges.

Interesting to consider that, should Adisa and Myrtle ADMIT to the offense, it would make my proposal that much easier to achieve.

What say YOU, Wattson?

  • Zeke

Re: So here’s my plan regarding Adisa et al:
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 21, 2021 11:32 AM

On 2021-01-21 19:35, My Dear Wattson wrote:

I like the plan very much. A little benevolent leverage, applied delicately but firmly!

I am nothing if not fair-minded.

I read the letter from last night about the cops coming. Just great how smoothly that went!! And handsome cops, too!

I couldn’t have asked for a better scenario. I will print out my idea, sign it, and tape it to Myrtle’s door, with the words “a friendly resolution enclosed” on the envelope. I’m out of stamps.


January 21, 2021 (updated 1/24/21 to include these additional conditions: free utilities, Internet service, and garbage pickup…all locks changed and a decent security system provided…complete laundry facilities…no rent increases…occupation of new residence for as long as you want to stay there, under condition you never have more than one house-mate)

Dear Ms. Haversak and son,

Based on the Buddhist (and, I guess, Christian) philosophy that one must resolve a conflict in the most benevolent way possible, I will push for Ablahblah Realty to move you to a 2-bedroom cottage or similar structure, with a backyard or garage or other space, where Adisa(sp?) can have his friends over in a covid-safe environment, without putting neighbors at risk. And charge you half the price in rent, to what you’re already paying. Plus, all utilities and other services (such as garbage pickup) must be free to you, the tenant, including Internet service (which must be at least twenty megabits per second download speed). The locks must also be changed before you move in, and a decent security system installed, if it isn’t already: both lock replacement and security paid for in full by Ablablah Realty for as long as you live there). Complete laundry facilities (washer, dryer, folding table)should be provided on the premises.

Another condition is that the residence offered would be to your liking, including neighborhood. My suggestion is somewhere in the Inner Sunset, and close to the N Judah line. Finally, the rent should never be raised, so long as you, Myrtle Haversak, live there…and you should be allowed to occupy that residence for as long as you want, under condition that you have no more than one house-mate sharing said residence.

Considering the severity of the offense (risking exposure to a deadly virus, to the residents of 9666 Market Street), I think Ablahblah Realty just may go for it…under condition that I sign a binding agreement that I would be satisfied with such a resolution, and will not proceed with pressing any further charges.

I will soon discuss this with my attorney, but I want to assure you that the resolution I’ve proposed herein, is the only one I will accept. Please keep this letter in safekeeping; it has my signature…thus there is no way now, that I can back out of it. And feel free to show it to our building manager, or anyone else you’d like. But perhaps it’s best you keep this to yourselves for the time being.

Should Ablahblah Realty finally get in touch with you, let me know, and I will gladly intercede, and explain my proposal. Especially if they come off as hostile in any manner. Nonetheless, my attorney will contact them, eventually.

Furthermore: please be assured that any further encounters with these young people in my hallway, will result in my contacting the police immediately. They have no right to loiter in a building which they do not occupy, no right to disturb the peace in said building, and absolutely no right to endanger the residents by refusing to wear a mask.

Most sincerely,

Ezekiel J. Krahlin


Re: So here’s my plan regarding Adisa et al:
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 21, 2021 2:14 PM

Do they have the IQ to understand what you’re saying?

Ha, ha…not my problem. I’m sure that Ablahblah’s attorneys will understand quite clearly, that my proposal is a much better deal than they would get in a court of law. Since I only remailed the first letter this morning, I’ll wait two days before sending them a copy of my letter to Myrtle.

My second letter was stuck to their door with scotch tape about an hour ago: blank envelope, same way the manager leaves notices. It’s still there. I heard a young black fellow’s voice inside, singing to stupid rap music…but it doesn’t sound like Adisa. Don’t they realize their very future’s at stake…and that it’s not rap, basketball or even promoting Nike sneakers? Whatever, this is just interpreting the situation on the lower level of the strictly mundane.

On the metaphysical level, however, they are simply just another bunch of bodhisattvas testing my courage and moral stature. Not to prove anything to anyone, except my own fortunate self…that I can do it.

  • Zeke

PS: Sonic and AT&T techs came by again at 1 o’clock, and got my Internet speed back up from 6.2 Mbps to 8.2…so it’s all returned to normal, finally. Jeez, why is so much crap happening to me all at once? Well, the doggies give me more strength and joy than I’ll ever need to tackle anything. But I am SO tired of one idiot after another forcing me to play out their melodrama. So much hatefulness in this city…we’re swimming in it!


Subject: My 2nd message to attorney Kingsley
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 21, 2021 4:02 PM

He’s the one I originally contacted some months back (Jared Kingsley) about the elevator workers possibly sharing my hallway restroom, and not wearing masks. Again, I posted to him via his business’s contact form:

–begin:

I posted a message via this form to you, on January 14, I believe, about a serious problem of strangers loitering in my building, being a peace disturbance, and exposing residents to the novel coronaviirus because they don’t wear masks. Well, the situation has escalated, in that my neighbor’s son, who is the one bringing these people over, threatened to punch me in the face. His anger, and that of his mother’s, is the result of my sending a letter of complaint to the property owner, which is Ablahblah Realty, and a cc to my neighbor and her son, and the building manager. I already included a link to that letter, in my previous message.

I called 911 right after he threatened me, and now have a CAD number for the incident, which is 210203159. Officer’s name is Dyer, badge 1382 or 1352. The writing is kind of sloppy on the form note Officer Dyer handed me.

The two cops did speak with them, while I waited in my own room. When done there, they came back to me and did admit that her son struck them as belligerent.

So here I am, vulnerable as all get out, with no support from the manager or anyone else. I want very much to find an attorney who can handle my case. Please advise…ASAP if at all possible. My phone number is no longer down, BTW, so you can voice call me if you’d like. But email’s just fine with me.

–end


SUPER URGENT: Adisa now claims one of my dogs bit him and drew blood!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 21, 2021 7:16 PM

According to this letter from the building manager, which is pretty much bullshit all the way through:

Click here for a larger view.

They probably hatched this plot before receiving my resolution letter…say, like, earlier this morning or perhaps last night. Which I’d say pretty much puts me in a favorable light as far as my character goes. So, since my email to the manager is kept for legal records, I just posted this to him a moment ago, right after reading the letter he stuck to my door:

This is for the record, of course; thanks for keeping the email channels open, as your voicemail is sometimes inaccessible because all filled up:

My dogs are very sweet natured, and have never bitten anyone. You saw when they ran up the stairs and you were at the landing, they just barked, there was no biting involved. And when you reached a hand out in friendship to them the other day, they sniffed for awhile, then backed off and started barking. No one in this building, except for Adisa, ever complained about the dogs’ so-called “aggressive and threatening behavior,” which are the words you used in your letter to me, today, January 21, 2021. And I take offense at your applying such harsh words that are blatantly untrue.

Since the pandemic started, the building has grown quiet, and the hallways empty most of the time. So I adopted Lucky and Flaco at a time when they are not accustomed to seeing anyone but me in the building, on a regular basis. So of course they’ll bark at other residents, because they’re seen as intruders. However, they have grown more relaxed over time, and bark far less often than when they first arrived. And they are becoming more obedient to my “no barking” command. They used to bark at Curtis, but no longer, and the same is happening to others they have seen coming up or down the stairs more than several times. So, in a little more time, say a month or two, any barking at residents will soon become a non-issue.

They are totally quiet in my room, except when a fire engine or skateboarder or crazy, screaming person goes by outside. They are very peaceful, nondestructive little doggies…they don’t wreck the room one bit, and they are totally housebroken…they scratch at the door if they need to go, but that rarely happens since I frequently take them outside. I never leave them alone except for when I use the restroom, or step around the corner to purchase my morning brew. They make absolutely no noise, but patiently await my return, while sitting on the bed. They are incredibly stable, especially considering what they’ve been through before I adopted them off the streets. But even when they WERE living outside, they showed little aggressive tendency, except when some loud, drugged out vagrant seemed to be a threat to their owner.

As for Adisa’s accusation that one of my dogs bit him: he only brought that up after I complained via my letter, about having his friends linger in the hallway for one or more hours, one or more times per week, being disruptive with their noise, and not wearing masks…all directly in front of my door, which is a horrid invasion of my privacy. It seems pretty obvious he’s lying, and just hatched that idea as retaliation. And it is most shameful that his mother plots this lie with him. Had he really been bitten, he would’ve reported it to you right away, and possibly called the police, who would have taken the dogs from me. He also would’ve gone to a hospital or clinic, and have the wound checked out, and taken pictures of it. None of this has occurred, because neither of my dogs have ever attacked him. in fact, they’ve never even been near him. In other words: he has absolutely no evidence that either of my pups ever bit him, let alone drew blood.

I repeat: no one in this building (other than you-know-who) has ever had a problem with my doggies being aggressive or threatening. They are simply defending what they think is my (and thus their) territory, in a harmless albeit noisy fashion. And this situation has been gradually subsiding over the weeks, anyway.

As for Myrtle claiming her son never threatened to punch me in the face: she was right there when he said it. They had just walked away from our altercation (which was last night around 7:20 PM), and had turned the corner as they reached their apartment, when Adisa spoke those words. I was still in the hallway near my room, and called back to him: “Don’t threaten me!” Possibly, another resident heard his suggestive threat, or overheard the divisive conversation we three had in the hallway. I was totally calm, but firm, through the entire conversation…reminding both of them that inviting people to hang out in the hallway (without even asking any resident on that floor, if it’s okay with them), being noisy and, worst of all, not wearing a mask, is totally illegal. Especially the mask issue, without which wearing one puts all residents at risk of contracting the novel coronavirus. They willingly persisted in having them hang out in the hallway numerous times, these past several months, perhaps longer…knowing full well the hazard their maskless visits present in possibly spreading a deadly virus. And they also used the restroom shared by myself, and two other residents…thus further increasing the likelihood of spreading covid-19.

I am ending this email now, but do request you cease using such emotionally charged and falsely negative terms against two wonderful little pooches who put so many smiles on people’s faces here in the Castro, and in this building. I’ve noticed they’ve also put a smile on your face two or three times.

Most sincerely,

Ezekiel J. Krahlin

Honestly, my dear Wattson, I’d exit this sorry old town in a split second, without even looking back once, if I could. But I really can’t. They’re gonna take the doggies from me! Well, probably not, as according to bodhisattva tenet, remaining calm and collected is all it takes to vanquish what appears to be evil, but is not. Still, I’d rather not go through any more of this bullshit. I’d rather pack up and leave. With my beloved brindlekin, of course.

  • Zeke

Re: SUPER URGENT: Adisa now claims one of my dogs bit him and drew blood!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 21, 2021 7:28 PM

Fucking LOWLIFES.

And obviously the building manager is playing along with them, by using emotionally charged words to describe the doggies in his letter to me, such as “aggressive” and “threatening.” I’ve been hugging my darling pooches a lot now, hoping for a miracle. I don’t ever want their kind, sweet little souls out of my arms…they love me so much, it’s incredible how happy they are these days! Especially Flaco, who plunks her little paw on my knee quite often, and looks up at me with such loving eyes. And climbs onto my lap so many times, just to be closer. And Lucky is so loving as well, also reaching out with his chubby little paw, and seeking my lap more than ever before. We do a lot of group hugs!

I can NOT allow them to be taken away from me! But I have no idea how to do that. Return them to Deek? No, they’d die out there, Deek is bipolar and a meth head. But the dogs may be taken away from me at any moment.

I doubt anyone in the building who likes the pups would want to get involved enough to defend me. And I know no one with a home who would take them in until I find a more permanent solution. If I flee the city and go homeless, they’d be back out on the streets again. Is pleading with my brother to take me and the doggies in, an option? I don’t think so. This is tragic.

I can only trust a higher force, thus the miraculous.

  • Zeke

Re: SUPER URGENT: Adisa now claims one of my dogs bit him and drew blood!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 21, 2021 7:42 PM

Just on the strength of a flimsy accusation?? Totally fucking outrageous.

I don’t have any proof they’ve had their rabies shots…because stupid Deek lost those tags within a week after adopting each one. And I can’t afford to get them their shots again, just to acquire the tags. ANYONE can accuse someone of their dog biting them and drawing blood, and the pet will be whisked away to be inspected for any contagion. The accuser does NOT need to provide any proof of being bitten…the law deals with that later. The only GOOD thing about this, is Adisa and his mother can be brought up on charges of false accusation. But I hope the Greater Law takes action swiftly, rather than the slow, agonizing plotting of man’s law. Because man’s law considers pets mere property, not living, feeling, loving, sweet souls. WE know better!

Oh, God, this is awful. If it comes down to the wire, maybe somebody up here would be able to take them. You do have a few staunch pals and fellow-doggie-lovers. Angie Porphyri, whom you’ve seen on the list, lives and breathes for dogs and cats. Maybe consult her.

No they can NOT be taken away from me…I am supposed to be WITH them at all times. It would break their hearts should I disappear from their lives. Besides, I probably will be threatened with eviction, even if I remain here without the doggies…and OTHER nasty stuff would continue, and get worse. All THREE of us need to amscray, unless a miracle happens very soon. I’m wondering if this is where Larkin enters back into the picture. He has lots of connections. And I understand now, that the many incredible things he said to me were for a near-future time, which I believe is NOW. For example, when he said to me some years ago: “Our friendship, our being brought together, is an INCREDIBLE godsend!” He said that and other sweet and amazing things to me on and off over the years, knowing they wouldn’t be fully understood until NOW. It also explains very well, why he treated my pepper spraying him with a light touch, as well as his shoving me to the ground later that night (because the second time I tried to spray him when he approached, the canister was empty) with an equally light touch. He essentially laid me down on the ground through force of will, instead of through a violent punch.

Keeping my fingers crossed. Oh, almost forgot: I am preparing my next blog entry to be released later this evening, called “Letter to the Landlord (part 2).” It’s all about the wickedness that has befallen myself and the doggies. Maybe a kind hand will reach out as a result, offering all three of us refuge. The title itself has no sense of urgency, but the excerpt I’ll include, certainly will…so that list subscribers may know right off the bat that this is TRULY urgent. I also have been acquiring a sort of fan base through my WordPress account and Youtube channel. Who knows WHAT kind person may reach out to me?

I’m very good with resolving crises…I’m SMARTER than most others, and that counts for a lot, too. So I should figure out the right solution before long, meaning by tomorrow or the next day. All I know is, I gotta move FAST to keep from losing Flaco & Lucky!

  • Zeke

Re: My message to attorney Kingsley
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 21, 2021 9:40 PM

Re: the fake dog-bite accusation. Can you contact those two nice cops and maybe consult them about it??

Good idea, but I don’t even think I need to do that, as he surely would’ve told me Adisa said he was bitten. I could contact him, and ask if he could vouch for that. However, Adisa could simply say he was too flustered to mention it at the time. But I WILL keep Officer Ryan in mind, as possible leverage…seeing as he told me that Myrtle’s son came off as belligerent. But I suspect he’ll be more helpful to my struggle, as a card later played. As far as the dog bite issue, I’m sure he’ll tell me the same as this not-so-reassuring article:

https://houston.culturemap.com/news/city-life/04-22-10-presumed-guilty-when-your-dog-is-falsely-accused/

All decent cops know that Adisa’s ornery behavior is a likely sign of guilt, of covering up a lie. I saved the life of one of their own, back in 1985, and that’s Randolph Taylor of course, who was, for a time, a cop in the SFPD. I’m hoping that such excellent karma will now kick in and pull some punches in a certain direction. Metaphorically speaking, of course. Who knows WHO’S reading my Brindlekin Tales, and lives in San Francisco, or even the Castro? They could quickly figure out who the culprits are, in spite of all the pseudonyms. I’m spilling the beans like nobody’s business! Friendly Ghost Detective Agency is on a roll!

Speaking of saving lives: THIS IS WHAT I GET FOR SAVING EVEN MORE LIVES, BOTH CANINE AND HUMAN? It’s obvious how I saved the mutts’ lives, but in terms of human lives, I’ve put the kibosh on people loitering in the hallways without masks. Thus, less opportunity for a deadly virus to have its way with the residents of 9666 Market Street.

But HERE’S a question I cast your way, my dear Wattson:

What is Kevin’s motive for siding with Myrtle and her devious offspring, when it’s OBVIOUS Adisa is lying through his teeth? He’s setting himself up for a big fall, in the law’s eyes…doesn’t he see that? So what say you, Wattson; personally I’m perplexed over the building manager’s “strategy” (for desire of a better word). He already screwed up by his highly and wrongfully subjective accusations of addressing the doggos as both “threatening” and “aggressive.” And in a signed letter at that, so he can’t take them back!

And I’m also wondering how YOU think my letter of resolution has impacted them, as it presumably arrived in their hands AFTER their deceptive allegations to the manager. Wattson, this case has me flummoxed! Oh, and one more thing for you to mull over:

Do you think Myrtle and Adisa’s relationship will deteriorate, because they are plotting lies together? I think it’s obvious it will, but I can’t figure out how soon, and in what ways.

  • Zeke

Re: SUPER URGENT: Adisa now claims one of my dogs bit him and drew blood!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 21, 2021 9:56 PM

What would it cost to get the shots and the tags?

I’ll have to call the SPCA tomorrow, and find out…as nowhere on their website do they say! But it does say here that, due to the pandemic, vaccination will not be offered again until March 1st!

Be that as it may, the dog bite accusation is BEFORE any proven vaccination.


Re: SUPER URGENT: Adisa now claims one of my dogs bit him and drew blood!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 22, 2021 12:40 AM

Have the accusers gone to any authorities yet with their story?

Not as far as I know. The building manager is going to speak with them tomorrow. However, he already appears to be biased in their favor, by his selection of hostile adjectives about the doggies, in the letter he posted to my door this evening. But they won’t NEED an attorney, because the property owner has a whole passel of them, and I’m sure they’ll have one of THEM take her case. After all, they are ultimately responsible for allowing maskless teenagers to wander about our hallways.

I think they’re all quickly burying themselves into a deeper and deeper hole! Adisa and his mother scheming together…just what do they teach them at the Unitarian Universalist Church, for God’s sake? One of the things she whined to me about in the hallway was how she works all day, and can’t watch her son 24/7. The tone in her voice implied SHE works all day, but “I” do not. The classist prejudice sticks out like a sore thumb! And Adisa seems not too bright, as he can’t keep his stories straight. He’s weaving his own web around himself.

Once I get an attorney, things will fall apart on their side. And I can easily imagine Adisa blabbing all his BS to his “friends,” one of whom might spill the beans in my favor. Well, tomorrow’s another day. The dogs can’t believe what a fluffy bed they have to nest in! They’re like all blissed out, laying on their backs with their forelegs straight up, and paws dangling like figs.

  • Zeke

P.S.: Don’t forget to check out my Friendly Ghost Detective Story piece I sent you…you will have a ton of belly laughs.


Subject: The peaceful nature of my dogs (in their defense)
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Kevin Bond (building manager)
Date: January 22, 2021 1:16 PM

I have been documenting my caring for these dogs for some months now, including many videos which reveal their peaceful, friendly nature. Here are three video collections that do just that:

Jus’ Walkin’ the Doggies
https://zekeblog.wordpress.com/2021/01/09/jus-walkin-the-doggies/

Dog-In-A-Box: Order Yours Today!
https://zekeblog.wordpress.com/2021/01/15/dog-in-a-box-order-yours-today/

One Picture is Worth a Thousand Heart Throbs
https://zekeblog.wordpress.com/2021/01/17/one-picture-is-worth-a-thousand-heart-throbs/


Re: SUPER URGENT: Adisa now claims one of my dogs bit him and drew blood!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 22, 2021 12:40 AM

Have the accusers gone to any authorities yet with their story?

Not as far as I know. The building manager is going to speak with them tomorrow. However, he already appears to be biased in their favor, by his selection of hostile adjectives about the doggies, in the letter he posted to my door this evening. But they won’t NEED an attorney, because the property owner has a whole passel of them, and I’m sure they’ll have one of THEM take her case. After all, they are ultimately responsible for allowing maskless teenagers to wander about our hallways.

I think they’re all quickly burying themselves into a deeper and deeper hole! Adisa and his mother scheming together…just what do they teach them at the Unitarian Universalist Church, for God’s sake? One of the things she whined to me about in the hallway was how she works all day, and can’t watch her son 24/7. The tone in her voice implied SHE works all day, but “I” do not. The classist prejudice sticks out like a sore thumb! And Adisa seems not too bright, as he can’t keep his stories straight. He’s weaving his own web around himself.

Once I get an attorney, things will fall apart on their side. And I can easily imagine Adisa blabbing all his BS to his “friends,” one of whom might spill the beans in my favor. Well, tomorrow’s another day. The dogs can’t believe what a fluffy bed they have to nest in! They’re like all blissed out, laying on their backs with their forelegs straight up, and paws dangling like figs.

  • Zeke

P.S.: Don’t forget to check out my Friendly Ghost Detective Story piece I sent you…you will have a ton of belly laughs.


A Clearer Head Prevails
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 22, 2021 1:01 PM

I had a good sleep, and the initial shock is over. Some BIG flaws in their attack on me…and by “their” I mean not just Adisa and mother, but also the building manager, Kevin Bond, and Ablahblah Realty. The MAJOR issue they have ALL glossed over is violating the pandemic mandate to wear a mask indoors. And THAT is what I HAVE emphasized through all my letters, messages and verbal accusations. My infuriation over this is completely justified…on top of having strangers hanging out in the hallway, mostly in front of my door, acting in an intimidating and loud behavior. There is NO way I could justifiably be accused of racism because they’re all African American. ANYONE would be pissed, no matter the color of their skin.

It seems pretty obvious to me that neither the manager nor Ablablah Realty cares to address the maskless issue for the serious matter that it is…because it IMPLICATES them. It is VERY unlikely, however, that any judge or attorney working on my behalf, would gloss over this glaring offense. My understanding is that Kevin gave is “okay” to the miscreants to let these teenagers hand out in my hallway…and did not even bother to demand they were masks!

The two other flaws are:

1) Manager Kevin Bond’s negatively, unfairly and wrongfully biased description of my doggies as “threatening” and “aggressive” in his printed and signed letter he stuck to my door. That is a judgment call that holds no lawful ground. In fact, it reflects poorly on his handling of this matter.

2) Myrtle Haversak and her son have so far made TWO false accusations, making them MOST vulnerable to perjury in a court of law. They both denied that Adisa threatened me with violence…and though nigh impossible to prove without a witness that he DID threaten me, it IS possible that their neighbor right opposite their door heard it. As for their mutual charge that one of my dogs bit her son: it came well within less than 24 hours after my letter of complaint, which timing is suspicious in and of itself. On top of that, Adisa NEVER reported this supposed dog bite on whatever day he claims it happened…not to the manager, not to the landlord, not to a doctor or clinic, not to another resident…NOT TO ANYBODY! Obviously, he has no medical record of any dog bite, to bolster his claim, either.

I am counting on Adisa’s youthful and high-strung indiscretions to screw up his case further, along with his mom’s complicit aiding and abetting his (and her) lies. Today is when Kevin holds a conversation with them…and I wonder what OTHER false charges they will invent? BRING IT ON!

Just earlier this morning, as I was returning from walking the brindlekin, I crossed paths with Mr. Bond, and greeted him with a friendly “good morning.” I think the best way to jangle their nerves is to always remain cool and collected…so as to make them fear I have some hidden weapon in my arsenal, that may cause them to slip up further. Nothing like the value of a poker face, in this board game I call “Battle of the Bodhisattvas!”

But you know what, Wattson? I DO have a “hidden weapon,” though staring the world in its face! That would be my “Brindlekin Tales” that document my caring for the pups, including videos of their playfulness and sweet nature. There is not one single mention in these chapters, of any kind of unruly or dangerous behavior. Of course, one could be accused of excluding such incidents, but I’d say the overall impression these tales give, is most favorable in my defense.

I DO suspect that Ms. Haversak had seen an opportunity to try and turn the tables, once she received my letter. By this I mean: an opportunity to turn it into some kind of pathetic drama where she could eventually sue Ablahblah Realty for wads of cash…then get outta there and move to a large space. My suspicion is due to the first confrontation she had with me (before she dragged out Adisa for the second), she almost immediately toss out the suggestion that I’m trying to get her evicted! However, there is also aNOTHER kind of setup I conjecture that is actually most benevolent and thus, a typica bodhisattva more. Which is this:

They are all in this together, including Ablahblah, in order to act out a script whereby I wind up being the victor, by their playing my enemy…and my courage spreads across the neighborhood and, perhaps, beyond. There are some good reasons for suspecting this, as the sloppy handling of this matter by all parties involved (excepting yours truly, of course) are sort of clues that this is but a game which end is already set up. And that end is for me to come out the winner.

What say YOU, Wattson?

  • Zeke

Re: The peaceful nature of my dogs (in their defense)
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 22, 2021 3:35 PM

“Contemporaneous notes,” as they call them, are valid in court. If you recorded events, in writing or on video soon after they happen, they count as “evidence.” Witness James Comey’s contemporaneous notes on the conversation he had with Trump, where Trump tried to secure his “loyalty.”

EXCELLENT! I did NOT know that, and since I already document so much going on in my life, especially with the doggies, KNOWING this will certainly work to my advantage. So, it looks like the buliding manager just checked out those three doggie-video blog entries, because all three notices came in a row, that someone just did a “pingback” of each, one right after another. And it was only THOSE articles within a five-minute time slot. Not that that’s what pingbacks are supposed to do, that is: inform you whenever someone’s logged onto one of your pages. They’re designed to inform you whenever someone adds a link to your page to THEIR page. So, I’m not really sure WHAT’S going on with that, but the coincidence of those three articles, and only those three, were pinged back within a short time of each other, makes me think it must’ve been Kevin.

Plus, the first article, called “Jus’ Walkin’ the Doggies” has a link to the video where Deek agreed to give up the dogs for $300! You really can’t miss it. Another good thing that sending those links to Kevind does, is make him aware of my “Brindlekin Tales” page, and see I’m also documenting OTHER stuff going on in the building, including this latest Adisa debacle. IOW: he will come to realize that I’m MORE than prepared for a possible court case, as I’ve set everything up that way, months in advance. I certainly am smarter than the average cookie! Then maybe Arikat Realty will discover what I call THEM: “Ablahblah Realty.”

I’ve had these fantasies on and off for the past few months, of being taken to court over the doggies, and jurors were all required to read ALL my Brindlekin Tales and THEN some (from my blog). And they love my tales so much (even the judge) I win my case like a boss, and the popullarity of my WordPress site skyrockets! So that, if the law should ever take my dogs away, there will be demonstrations on the streets, with placards that say: “Give the Doggies Back to Zeke!”

What is happening here on the bodhisattva level, is I’m being pressured to stay on my toes all the time, think quicker than I’ve ever done before…and in so doing, increase both my learning and thinking skills! Now, it just occurred to me (that is, the little pterodactyl told me), that my documentation reveals the date of when the manager and I were in the lobby, and he reach a hand out to the doggies…when then starting sniffing his hand,legs and shoes…then backed away and started barking. Just barking, no biting. SO THAT’S ON CAMERA! Which is proof they do not bite, even when they might feel threatened, simply because they see you as a stranger, or not belonging in the building. I’m goind to soon send another email to him, that will say:

“Here’s an idea: why not interview some of the residents, and ask if they feel threatened by my doggies? I’m sure none of them have any problem with the dogs, and will say just that. Also, the day you extended a friendly hand to Lucky and Flaco, they didn’t try to bite you…first, they sniffed away, then stepped back and started barking. I believe that was on Sunday, January 17th, if my documentation is accurate. So, the incident has also been recorded by the lobby camera, as proof they are not aggressive…or threatening.”

Seeing as Kevin is mandated by law to save all email from residents, Ablahblah and their lawyers will also get to see that recording. Because what email I post to him, he MUST preserve…even if the email contains web links or references to incidents in the lobby. Hilarious. And if he DOESN’T save them, and make them accessible to Ablahblah et al, he’s in hot water. Besides which, I’m saving them, too.

So, Ablablah will soon know about my Brindlekin Tales, including my two chapters entitled “Letter to the Landlord (part 1)” and “Letter to the Landlord (part 2).” All names are pseudonymous BTW, as well as the address of the building, which I state as 9666 Market Street. All links to snail mailed letters, both envelopes and the actual letters, have names and other personal identifiers blacked out, including street addresses. And, of course, learn the pseudonym I use for THEM! If they have the LEAST bit of sense of humor, they’ll get quite a kick out of it. Or not. They might indeed be rather worried as to its potential popularity growing here in the Castro. At which point EVERYONE in the district will know who I am, the doggies and how I came to acquire them, and the harassment that’s befallen yours truly, by some awfully wicked people. They’ll quickly figure out the REAL name of the property owner, the building manager, and of Adisa and Myrtle. Do you think I’ve left myself open to legal repercussions in so doing? Will their attorney demand I remove all relevant pages and videos, and confiscate my computer?

At any rate, if they REALLY feel threatened, they’re gonna move quickly…like later today, perhaps.

So, perhaps that fantasy WILL come true: that my day in court will result in my popularity as an author, activist and queer theologist SKYROCKETING! No better name for one of my doggies than “Lucky!” Or maybe I’m totally deluded, they’ll take the dogs away and lock me up.

What say YOU, my dear Wattson? I tingle with trepidation, knowing they could be reading this very sentence RIGHT NOW.

  • Zeke

Re: The peaceful nature of my dogs (in their defense)
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 22, 2021 9:06 PM

My advice is to pinpoint the location, on the various videos, of relevant “proof,” refuting each false claim, in consecutive order, with dates. Remember, people are obtuse, unimaginative and have tiny little attention spans. They need to be spoon-fed. You can’t rely on them to figure any of this out on their own.

Okay, that makes good sense, but I have no idea what videos you speak of. Do you mean, the ones online, on my Youtube channel, that are also linked from my WordPress blogs? As far as videos go, the only relevant ones to this Adisa debacle, are about the dogs…and all they show is how sweet natured they are. And there is a date for each one. Location is always here in the Castro. I feel like I should understand what you mean, but I’m totally bamboozled. Do you mean like this:

Add a comment to the doggie video pages saying something like: “Now how can anyone think these sweet little pups are threatening or aggressive? Just look at ’em, your heart’s gonna melt!” Of course, that would add a harsh flavor to the videos, which I never intended.

I don’t have any other videos, including those that would refute the lie that Adisa never threatened me, or the lie about one of my doggies biting him.

All of this, your story(ies), leaves the old “Tales of the City” in the dust.

Thank you…and yes, it certainly does! I have a plethora of older stories, too, on my website, called “True Tales from the Castro – eat your heart out, armistead!” Brindlekin Tales is but the latest, and the finest by far, though all my earlier ones are still superb, including those from “Free Me From This Bond.”

This is SF now–hollowed-out, decaying, cultures colliding, desperate people clawing for survival. And in the middle of it, two magical little doggie-saints, exuding perfect love.

Precisely. And we three are living in the belly of the beast, surrounded by vultures constantly plotting how to destroy us. And every one of them is gonna fail big time. However, MY story is going to end with everyone winning. For those who play my enemies are actors, and nothing more…paving my way to become the main hero. Just like on a stage, how much more fun it is to play the villain than the good guy or gal! That’s all it is.

For soon, the loving energy of these two dogs and myself, is gonna radiate outward and transform,first, the Castro, then the entire city, and continue to expand, until the globe itself is under my wings of inspiration. I always dreamed of changing the world through my writing, but never something THIS extraordinary! (Nah, that’s a big, fat lie…I’ve HAD these astounding dreams all my life, ever since I was just pee-high to a grasshopper. I don’t really know who I am, Wattson…I’m, I’m, this THING.)

For THE MAGIC IS STILL THERE, in San Franshitsco, just deeply hidden. And “I” am the one to summon it into a grand rebirth to end all rebirths.

So, PLEASE set aside 10 minutes to read these two incredible passages: they are exquisite, they are beautiful: The first one is my Pterodactyl Pterry scene, and it’s about a six-minute read. It’s part of my “Letter to the Landlord (part 1)” chapter. Just search for pterodactyl, and you’re there:

https://zekeblog.wordpress.com/2021/01/12/letter-to-the-landlord/

Can you imagine Ablahblah attorneys getting to that part, and instantly dropping their services for this real estate company, and come running to promote MY stories, MY ideas, because they know a gold mine when they see one! Now THERE’S my REAL secret weapon.

Then in “Letter to the Landlord (part 2),” search for “upon Wattson,” and you’re good to go. 3 or 4 minute read. You will be extremely delighted and impressed, I guarantee. I so much enjoy reading either passage at least once a day. I’ve blown my own socks off…especially since this is JUST THE BEGINNING of “Friendly Ghost Detective Agency” finally taking off! It just came to me out of the blue, this pterodactyl, and she told me what to write down.

https://zekeblog.wordpress.com/2021/01/22/letter-to-the-landlord-part-2/

It’s gonna bury all other fairy tales 666 feet under!

  • Zeke

PS: Isn’t it fun playing your Watson to my Sherlock? Thanks for joining in! Oh, I started having visions this afternoon of Adisa sneaking into my room and killing the dogs, while I was down the hall taking a poop. So know I never leave my door unlocked when I use the restroom. I suspect he’s the one throwing chicken bones around the sidewalk by the front gate. . I’m on top of it, but doesn’t he realize that could injure or kill someone else’s doggie? I need to have access to the lobby camera videos, but I don’t see HOW I’ll accomplish that. But really, it may not be him at all…however, when a person starts threatening others, they become suspect of FURTHER sins that are not their doing


Re: The peaceful nature of my dogs (in their defense)
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
January 22, 2021 8:54 PM

What I meant was whatever form your “contemporaneous notes” take, make sure the pertinent parts, that back up your assertions about the doggies’ peaceful nature, are highlighted. And in your Letter to the Landlord, Part 1, you document (and date!) the problem of the loud, rude kids in the hall and, specifically, your fears of retaliation for complaining about them. All well before the kid faked the story about the dog-bite. And in Landlord, Part 2, you document the kid threatening you (Jan. 20, 7:20 PM). This supports your assertion that he invented the dog bite story out of whole cloth, AFTER he threatened you, instead of punching you in the face.

Okay, I see…just keep on doing what I’m doing: documenting everything. I don’t think the manager (or any other party involved) had any idea I’m a prolific writer, especially when it comes to writing about my own experiences, albeit often in a highly imaginative form…in which cases the truth remains intact, though part of the storyline. It’s 6:25 AM, I just woke up…so nice to awaken to a kind friend’s words! And my doggies: great comfort they are, I owe them everything. They have become SO trusting and loving to me…how could anyway call such animals “dumb?”

Because of my present debacle (a case that should’ve been already closed, but exploded in my face) I wake up with a bit of an anxiety attack…but soon squelch it because I know better: that I am only scaring myself, and if I don’t like that feeling, just change it. It clears up within a few minutes.

Isn’t it amazing that i have this inner sense of subconsciously protecting myself from a future conflict that I don’t see coming? Only does hindsight give me that understanding, in each particular scenario. Something amazing is happening to me, that is profound on a VERY deep level…far, far more than just making a breakthrough in my writing. It’s a type of super power that will NOT allow me or those I love be harmed, in the long run. I hesitate to say about my enemies that they don’t know what they’re messing with, but it is nonetheless true. However, one cannot stop at a conclusion that is the lowest level of thought…for it projects misery back AT them.

Here’s where the bodhisattva theory comes in: that all seemingly wicked attacks will transform themselves into a benevolent outcome. Which turnabout, I surmise, should commence very soon, based on how low the situation has presently sunk. I will not be arrested or evicted, the doggies will not be taken away from me, I will not be injured, etc. Those are just the demons of fear tempting me to succumb, and, as it states in the Tibetan Book of the Dead, if one should not cave INto fear, they will finally drop their masks of evil to reveal themselves as but angels putting you through your paces.

What is so extraordinary, is, actually, hard proof of this being presented to me, that I may write it all down, and share it with the world.

Here are a couple of my fave passages from Friendly Ghost and Pterodactyl. Vivid, alive, half-dream and half hard-boiled reality:

But Wattson turned down my offer of a clean syringe filled with that shimmering nectar I so often crave…”

Yes, that IS one of my more outrageous but eloquent paragraphs. I love mocking the extremely long sentences that were so common back then. Quite a challenge to make them still smoothly readable, but I did it! And the sudden realization to the reader that these “people” in the tale are but electronic blips in a sophisticated, futuristic digital existence. This is a parody of the concept that we already live in a virtual reality, that our entire universe is also a virtual reality. But really, that is irrelevant in my opinion, as it’s consciousness that is key, not how it appears, or in what context. I think some readers will declare me racist, for the African prince shrunken heads part, but it is actually a lampooning of jolly olde white supremacist England. And Mrs. Hudnut is a spoof of Josie, the robot maid from The Jetsons. (Where do I come up with this stuff?)

Another great twist to FGDA, is that MY Sir Arthur Conan Doyle-ish tales are written from the perspective of Sherlock, rather than through the lens of Dr. Watson. At first, I didn’t realize that’s what I was doing, but just last night came to that realization. Maybe the two bons amis got their minds crossed in some futuristic machine akin to the one in that classic horror film, “The Fly.” Ha, ha. great idea!

‘I was thinking maybe that would be Larkin, but she suddenly fluttered away in a kind of medieval light such as you see in those paintings from the early Dark Ages…so I didn’t have a chance to ask.”

Yes, that was a nice touch if I say so myself…drawing in Larkin from previous tales outside of FGDA. For I actually sense quite strongly, he SHALL return, but on a most kind level rather than antagonistic…seeing as THAT part of our association is over and done with. He just might BE my rescuer, and provide me and my doggies with safe haven. Though that is just the plot, not the reality…because I already AM in safe haven, because at this point, no matter where I am physically, I shall ALWAYS be in safe haven. The rest is just a beautiful storyline or script playing out.

I have a feeling he’s a big chickenshit coward. But lock your door nonetheless.

I’ve come to that same conclusion myself. Let that be a lesson for him, that playing the tough black punk “niggah” is NOT the right path to a good life. Shame on his mother, though! I guess she fears losing him, should she do the right thing and set her foot down. This is actually understandable, and I have compassion for them both. I therefore look forward to the joyful resolution’s unfolding. Enough is enough!

I don’t see HOW this horrid scenario foisted upon me, is not ultimately the fault of the building manager, and of Ablahblah Realty. And should it go to court, that will all come out early in the game. So I’m sure we’ll have an out of court settlement, instead, that will satisfy me. I asked nothing for myself, in the resolution, BTW, but I wouldn’t be surprised if they offered me a decent place to live…say, in SF’s Inner Sunset District, which I enjoy. At least, “enjoy” in the sense of what this hell-damned city has to offer!

Thank you immensely, my dear Wattson…your take on this most bizarre case I’ve ever dealt with, has exceeded my every expectation! I shall speak quite well of you in my memoirs, you can certainly count on that. How foolish of me all these years, underestimating your OWN detective skills which, I must say, are as extraordinary as mine…just with a different approach.

  • Gumshoe Paranormal Detective Ezekiel J. Krahlin at your service!

Subject: Possible/Probable Key Witnesses
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 23, 2021 3:52 PM

These are my neighbors across the hall from me: two young gay men from Kazakistan or one of the other “stans” in that region. They both speak perfect English, not a trace of an accent. Anyway, if you think these hallway teenagers were close to MY door, they were even closer to THEIR door. Which is right beside the bottom of the stairs between my floor and the next one up. Plus, there is a single chair Kevin placed beside those stairs, to the right (while my neighbors’ door is to the left). So I’d say the intruders were frequently well LESS than ten feet from their door.

I imagine my middle eastern neighbors were also annoyed and felt imposed upon, possibly infuriated by their unexpected and sporadic presence…WITHOUT A MASK ON. They probably remained locked in their apartment for the entire duration of Adisa’s friends’ not-so-charming “visits.” Easier for them to do when they have their own bathroom.

But I don’t think speaking to them myself is the best approach…they might be scared away. I’d rather play this card via an attorney, who would most likely summon them to either the court itself, or demand a signed submission of their witness. It’s possible that the manager or even Ablahblah Realty already approached them…perhaps paying them off? If so, I’m sure it will backfire. Or maybe they’ll get around to reading this letter I’m composing now, once it’s posted to my Brindlekin site…and THEN approach them with a lucrative offer in exchange for keeping their lips zipped up tighter than a snare drum.

Oh, I keep forgetting to tell you: yesterday evening as I arrived back hovel with the doggies, there was Myrtle Haversak turning the key in the gate’s lock, and about to enter. But just when she started to swing the gate open, she glanced to her right, and saw me and the pups standing there from about thirty feet away. Looking directly at her, I made sure to appear totally calm and self assured…easy enough to do, as I really AM! The incident was but a brief second, though long enough nonetheless to produce the kind of impact that distant encounter was MEANT to produce! And I’m sure it wasn’t a pleasant one. For her, that is. For me, however, it struck my funny bone à la perfection.

Looking forward to our next soirée in my sitting room at 221B Fakir Street, I remain, as always,

Your very good friend,

Ezekiel Joseph Krahlin-Holmes III
Esquire and special consultant to our Most Transparent Lady of the Royal Frogmore Mausoleum, Queen Victoria


Subject: Hilarious image mashup I just created…
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: My Dear Wattson
Date: January 23, 2021 5:47 PM

…and placed right at the end of my Krahlin-Holmes/Wattson passage. Yes, I will no longer be just “Krahlin,” but “Krahlin-Holmes.” I’ve just edited that section to reflect the name-change.


zEEK’S PUPPY GRIFT

January 19, 2021

Re: [MCN-Announce]- zEEK’S PUPPY GRIFT
From: Zeke Krahlin MCN
To: MCN Announcement list, MCN discussion list
Date: January 10, 2021 2:53 PM

On Sun, 10 Jan 2021 14:48:09 Terry BOOGALOO Sachs squoinked:

PLEASE all friends of z. please sign your name and be public that you are so easily fooled and parted from your money. you know, he’s counting it now. more than enough to take care of puppies. where do you think the excess is going? into whose pocket?

FYI Mr. Sack-o-Shit, my project is totally transparent, including all expenses accrued from my GoFundMe account. In fact, from my donation page you’ll find a link to these expenses, updated the same day each time a purchase is made, or a service rendered. But I’ll save you the trouble of visiting my GFM side, by providing my list of expenditures here:

http://gay-bible.org/gofundme/index.htm

I only accrued $450 in donations so far, and am now down to $249.57. So if I can’t drum up more interest ASAP, it will all be gone in a month or so, maybe sooner. Because the pooches suddenly lost their appetite, and I had to spend considerably more money on food, to figure out some way to restore their desire to eat. But even worse, is my Internet connection has suddenly started crapping out on me. First my DSL land line went dead and has yet to recover, and now my connection is increasingly sporadic. It’s probably a short caused by the rain leaking into the phone box in this very old and decrepit building. But my provider isn’t being very helpful about it, and screwing me over, thus far. In order to fight back, I posted the entire problem and their less-than-helpful responses, to my web log, here:

https://zekeblog.wordpress.com/2021/01/10/chronic-dot-net/

They are the two complaints I sent to their support, which I’ve also reposted to their online forum, so other customers will become aware of their crude mistreatment towards me. Then I posted a link to that piece on my blog, to the ISP’s Twitter account, with the statement: “MAJOR problem with Sonic.net’s service!” I’ve also shared it with my own Facebook and Twitter accounts.

So you see, Mr. Sack-o-Shit, my writings, my dog rescue project, my growing success putting my wonderful tales out there, may soon all come crashing down, thanks to the shitty handling of my ISP. I’m sure at this point I’ve put a broad smile on your face. All good Germans are like that: slaking their thirst on the blood and suffering of decent people.


Re: [MCN-Discussion]- – zEEK’S PUPPY GRIFT
From: Fred McMillon
To: Discussion MCN
Date: Mon, 11 Jan 2021 3:37

Why validate him by reading and responding to his posts ?

Unless you find amusement in his mental illness as I used to or want to see the depths a “human” can sink to.

I blocked him as his mental illness no longer amuses me and his obsession with me and cyberstalking was getting disturbing.

Sad the number of women Suckers he took here on the List with his “Save the Puppies!” Go Fund Me site.

He has no pride or shame AT ALL !


Re: [MCN-Announce]- zEEK’S PUPPY GRIFT
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: MCN Announcement list, MCN discussion list
Date: January 11, 2021 7:03 PM

On 2021-01-11 12:18, Terry BOOGALOO Sachs squoinked:

I dragged this out of the Spam folder.

I’m sure that’s not the ONLY thing you drag out of your spam folder! Woo-hoo!

I have an acquaintance who says $450 is not very much,

No, it sure isn’t; and I have TWO pooches, not one. And veterinarian expenses are a whole different ball game, going into the thousands…and even more, if surgery is required. So, I can’t take them to a vet unless I achieve a HUGE leap in donations, or until I finally make that breakthrough with my writing. I suspect, however, that BOTH will happen at the very same time. I just might open a SECOND GoFundMe account for publishing and other expenses (like travel, and promotional tools) to get this off the ground. However, I believe my talents as an author are so profound any more, they will soon skyrocket me to fame, money and a lovely castle in Scotland.

but keep working your grift,

If “grift” is what you insist on calling it, Mr. Sack-o-Shit, then we MUST qualify that word with the adjective “angelic.”

it will give you something.

Yes, it will keep my mind off my heron addiction…a very expensive habit you know, as they are pricey birds to tend!

Meanwhile you have doggies.

Yes, meanwhile I do. They have read some of your nasty remarks addressed to yours truly, and simply advise me to pay you no mind. These are a couple of VERY stable mutts.

She also said give you a break cause you are disabled.

Borderline schizophrenia and bipolarity, with a whopping dose of PTSD thrown in. I wouldn’t wish any of this on my worst enemy except, perhaps, you! So my disability is NOT visible…thus why I suffer the additional burden of hateful prejudice, which only makes my PTSD worse, not better. Thus making the struggle enormously more difficult than need be. I have long ago concluded that the sickness lies not in me, but in society at large. Were that not the case, there’d be NO war, poverty, bigotry, or even Donald Trump and people just like him…or like you, I should add.

But because my borderline condition is of such a nature, I can forge ahead as an author and activist, which includes speaking out for others so beset with so-called “mental illness,” who are not capable of standing up for themselves…often because our cruel medical system persecutes them and uses them for laboratory experimentation, a.k.a. as “guinea pigs.” I am their guardian, so to speak…through my words.

May I remind you, Mr. Sack-o-Shit, that schizophrenia and bipolarity are far more common among geniuses and creative types. So it’s not all bad…in fact, if you can get a handle on it (especially withOUT any medications involved) you’d be amazed at how powerful and liberated you become! Carl Jung describes it as one’s own heroic journey: and my own personal experience of many years’ struggle stands the test of time: that Dr. Jung nailed it!

I replied that you may be disabled, but that hasn’t stopped you from insulting at every opportunity. I’m not a good German or a Nazi,

You certainly fit the profile, Mr. Sack-o-Shit. I am only pointing that out. How can stating something that’s true, be an insult, you scum-sucking, heartless Nazi reprobate? You would not be the FIRST “good German” to swear up and down and left and right, that he or she is NOT a Nazi, nor holds any sentiments WITH their diabolical ideology. Then they go right ahead with their daily chores–sweeping, fence mending, hanging freshly washed clothing out to dry, and gardening (which seems to be YOUR great joy in life)–pretending those are just cows, not terrorized Jewish folks, in those cattle cars passing by their quaint, Bavarian style cottages and on their way to be slaughtered.

but if your internet problems will make you act more human, praise be. sachs

If by “internet problems” you mean my new headache of my ISP failing to rectify the sudden deterioration of connection…than I say no, it doesn’t make me act more human. In fact it makes me act more like one of H.P. Lovecraft’s Older Gods, such as Cthulhu, Nyarlathotep or Azathoth. And you DON’T want to meet up with any one of them, I assure you! However, they’ve just informed me they have a special place for you in their own garden (you like gardening, I gather) composed of such bizarre, meat eating plants, they put rabid hyenas to shame!

After all is said and done, though, I thank you PROFUSELY from the bottom of my heart, for your $100 donation. I will spend it wisely…canine-wisely, that is. Woof!


Re: life
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Arnie Worster
Date: January 11, 2021 5:17 PM

Hi Zeke

Thank you for the tour of your hovel. It was a sobering experience for me to say the least. That and your video of Deek reminded me of how little I have to complain about up here in Little River (not that I am a big complainer).

I told you quite some time ago that I appreciated your wit and intelligent “rants” on the list serve, and have found somewhat amusing the reactions it has elicited from time to time from some of the other participants.

Thanks for taking care of those two furry souls, I hope that very little repercussions happen in your life as a result of your generosity.

I know it’s not much given our different stations in life, but I made a small contribution to your GoFundMe account.

Take care

Wow, you rock, Arnie! And I remember your posting me that compliment, which was a year or so ago, but I didn’t know about it, and only read it two weeks back. So I finally got around to thank you, in a reply. Thank you for your very kind words, and the donation. Just to ease your mind: I doubt very much I will run into any serious repercussions…but believe me, if I do, I will mop up the scumbags in their own excreta! I am gaining allies.


Re: Simon
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Arnie Worster
Date: January 11, 2021 7:10 PM

This is my fireball rescue

What a darling! He has Yoda ears, just like my Wiley! There is nothing so beautiful and fulfilling than saving a dog’s life by adopting one. They are a treasure in this world…truly man’s best friend. My two pups are presently sprawled out on the cot, looking as content and happy as can be. The feeling’s mutual.


Re: Simon
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Arnie Worster
Date: January 11, 2021 7:32 PM

I should have proofread better. Furball.

Ha! Hilarious…I thought you rescued him from a fire. Sweetest little doggie face ever.


Re: [MCN-Announce]- tSACH’S NAZI NIPPLE
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Announce MCN, Discussion MCN
Date: January 11, 2021 7:48 PM

On Mon, 11 Jan 2021 20:10:32 -0800 Fred BOOGALOO McMillon squoinked:

His ignorance of the law is apparent by his setting himself up for a libel suit.

You are truly The Mother Of All Drama Queens, Mr. Psychobitch. You’re due for your next douching BTW, according to your toxic cleansing consultant…and a deep enema ablution, as well! Woo-hoo!


Re: [MCN-Announce]- you can read the most stupid, self serving B.S from Terry Sack-o-Shit
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Announce MCN
Date: January 13, 2021 4:54 PM

On Sun, 10 Jan 2021 12:37:54 -0800 Rob Villanova posted:

You have a cold, cold heart, Mr. Sachs. Shame on you.

So cold, vaccine makers preserve batches of COVID-19 antigens with it!


Re: [MCN-Announce]- you can read the most stupid, self serving B.S from Terry Sack-o-Shit
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Announce MCN
Date: January 13, 2021 6:03 PM

On Sun, 10 Jan 2021 12:29:25 -0800 Terry BOOGALOO Sachs squoinked:

Not it’s not Trump, but our old friend from the Spam folder, the zEEKster. Try out one of his puppy drivels. Still fooling ’em. Don’t stop now.

What are you trying to prove, Mr. Sack-o-Shit? Because the only thing you’ve proven so far is just what a nasty, little homunculus of a schmuck you are! You are fast becoming the shame of the Emerald Triangle…like the Wicked Witch of the West. Woo-hoo!


Re: [MCN-Discussion]- – tSACH’S NAZI GRIFT
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: MCN Announcement list, MCN discussion list
Date: January 13, 2021 6:53 PM

On Mon, 11 Jan 2021 15:19:31 -0800 Terry BOOGALOO Sachs squoinked:

A lot of “friends” said that before. He was supposed to go away if ignored.

News flash: I never signed no stinkin’ contract, Mr. Sack-o-Shit!

I’ve found recently that many accept him because they haven’t read his continual B.S.

And you have? Now why IS that, Sack-o-Shit, since you claim to abhor what I post?

Go ahead, please block me and stay unaware of his damage/words.

FYI Mr. Sack-o-Shit: my (what you call) “damage/words” are in the process of healing many, as they spread outward like a bud swirls open. Not bad for a 70 year old, ex-hippie dropout and stalwart opponent of the status quo, eh?

I’ll continue to do as I like when it comes to posting.

IOW: you’ll continue beating your head against the wall, even when the blood starts to flow. Got it.

Ain’t you somethin’ else, Mr. Sack-o-Shit. But please, tell me this:

Whenever you get up on the wrong side of the bed, is it the devil’s face you first see, or is it your own…or is there really any difference in your case?


Re: [MCN-Discussion]- – tSACH’S NAZI GRIFT
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Discussion MCN, Announce MCN
Date: January 13, 2021 7:12 PM

On Mon, 11 Jan 2021 23:23:28 +0000 Mel Slaughter posted:

But with cojones they would first ban Spike Dewars and Fred McMillon who are far more toxic than anyone else.

“First?” So, you’re implying I should be THIRD on the list of people to be banned? That sounds about as wild as a 3-year-old orangutan in a go-kart, traversing its way around Times Square during rush hour!


Re: [MCN-Discussion]- – tSACH’S NAZI GRIFT
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Discussion MCN
Date: Fri, 15 Jan 2021 08:47:22 +0000

On Mon, 11 Jan 2021 23:49:46 +0000 Alvin Hock posted:

Mental Midget Gerard Randall Kozlowski, green with envy and using the fake name Fred McMillon, posts “Sad the number of women Suckers he took here on the List with his “Save the Puppies!” Go Fund Me site.”

Assuming you’ve read my posts here on the bodhisattva nature, you know I have concluded that Mr. Kozlowski IS one, who plays my enemy. This benefits me in two ways:

  1. I am challenged to find ways to stand up to him that are as compassionate as possible…and in so doing I am wiser and stronger for it.
  2. I wouldn’t have gotten as many donors from the MCN crowd, had he NOT insulted and threatened me in such a vile manner. One list subscriber has donated a whopping $50 out of empathy for what I’m having to put up with from him.

Yes, Zeke got more help than you have or will with your fascistic filth.

And his surliness has helped me drum up MORE donations than I would’ve received otherwise. Not that there’s anything wrong with your calling him to the carpet for his Nazi rants, but they HAVE benefitted me considerably, in that backdoor fashion. And I believe this is the case with anyone else who has purposely harassed me, such as Terry Sachs and Tom Cooper.

This is based on the philosophy that we have no enemies, only teachers…and is what Buddha extrapolated upon. IOW: my meditating on this attitude, and practicing it, has begun reaping rewards for me in spades. It actually creates a win/win situation ALL THE TIME for the lucky person who practices such a benevolent ideology.


Re: – tSACH’S NAZI GRIFT
Date: Fri, 15 Jan 2021 6:07 PM
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Discussion MCN

On Mon, 11 Jan 2021 15:37:23 -0800 Fred BOOGALOO McMillon squoinked:

I blocked him as his mental illness no longer amuses me

That fact that you claim to be amused by another person’s mental illness only serves to expose you as a rather disturbed and wicked person, Mr. Psychobitch. Is there some sort of contest up there in Mendoland, to become the “Most Obnoxious Resident of the Year?” Because if so, you’ve already won by a long shot, IMNSHO!

and his obsession with me and cyberstalking was getting disturbing.

False accusations indeed! Nonetheless, thanks immensely for your generous donation to my GoFundMe “Help Me Help 2 Homeless Doggies” project. Very kind of you…not many donors give me a whopping $100…more like $20. In fact, you’re the only one so far. <3 <3 <3


Re: zEEK’S PUPPY GRIFT
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Announce MCN, Discussion MCN
Date: January 16, 2021 2:09 PM

UPDATE ON DOGGIE DONATIONS AND THEIR MOST POSITIVE IMPACT

About a week ago, some kind donor delivered unto this humble monk’s cell (that is now also an emergency canine triage clinic for two lovely pups), a 30-pound bag of kibble. Which is low priority these days, because I already have another huge bag of the stuff still unopened, and the bag that IS already open, is barely half empty! I’m guessing he or she did not bother to check the priority level of that item, especially since Amazon doesn’t load “highest to lowest” by default; instead, you have to select that from the drop-down list. Now that I’ve altered their diet to resolve their diminished appetite, I only use ONE handful of the kibble per meal, instead of two, So I suppose I now have around a five-month supply of kibble instead of two or three! Maybe I should remove it entirely from the list for awhile. Wait, I just came up with a better method: I’ve just typed at the top of the comment box beside it: “NO NEED TO PURCHASE THIS ITEM UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.”

Their meals are now composed of the kibble mixed in with half-a-can of wet dog food each, and a generous crumbling of those rather-expensive-but-they-go-crazy-over-them leather treats (from Jeffrey’s Natural Pet Foods store just around the corner, Artemis bless ’em) made of boar, deer, bison, turkey, pig or chicken (and they love ALL the flavors, so I just mix ’em together, as each is the same price, $3.25 per ounce…which cost I deduct from my GoFundMe account). As a result, they are ready to pounce on their gourmet bowl of yummies every time I serve them up, which is twice a day…so far, so wonderful!

Anyway, just moments ago after returning from Rosenberg’s with a piping fresh cup of Arabica in my hands, I saw two large boxes in the lobby. Well, not quite true, because they were already there since last night, but I didn’t bother to check the address on either one. So I did just that, finally, to discover that ONE of them was for me, with large block letters that said HEAVY.

So I lugged it upstairs and into my hovel; upon opening I discovered a VERY generous assortment of doggie items:

  • 2 12-can cartons of Pedigree dog food
  • 1 box of 270 doggie poop bags
  • 2 high quality dog leashes
  • A 40-ounce bag of Top Chews’ Sausage Bites
  • 2 22-ounce spray bottles of Woolite Sanitizing Pet Stain & Odor Remover
  • 2 raincoats with duck design
  • 2 sweaters

What a great start to January 16th, a day I recently predicted could be a momentous one, not just for myself, but the entire Castro District, if not the whole city! Surely this sunrise treasure is but the first trickle of an unexpected downpour later on in the day. Meanwhile:

Upon entering the lobby this morning with coffee in hand–and before inspecting the two packages–here comes Monsieur Bond the building manager (and willful accomplice to a crime still in progress against yours truly) wobbling down the stairs and showing his age, which I believe is around seventy-five. I just stand there, observing him proceed in my direction: ginormous white mask covering more than half his face from the chin up, and strapped to his ears (no doubt prescribed by some witch doctor, to prevent his jaw from dropping off entirely, and out of which fly winged worms of malice), as I await my turn to use the stairway. Once he reaches a sort of planetary conjunction to my own heavenly body, I softly mumble “hi,” and (as to be expected) he does the same.

“He has NO idea what’s comin’ down the pike two or three days from now,” whispers the little pterodactyl ghost in my ear, referring to my letter to the landlord that I mailed out just four days ago. Though perhaps they HAVE received it, considering that several days have already passed. Though neither he nor any other party involved has given me any SIGN they have…at least, not yet.

Though I HAVE conjectured this may very well be as intended, in that Kevin, Myrtle and Adisa (her son) and friends have actually SET THE WHOLE THING UP in order to pave the way for a heroic victory on my part. And that even Ablahblah Realty is in on it! Thus, they are all most likely laughing their asses off right now, at my expense (God bless ’em).

  • Zeke

Re: [MCN-Announce]- – zEEK’S PUPPY GRIFT
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Announce MCN
Date: January 18, 2021 1:17 PM

On Mon, 11 Jan 2021 14:25:49 -0800 Peter Havrilchak squoinked:

PLEASE do not post responses to ZEEK or other trolls to the Announce list.

I am not a troll; you’re just a nasty person.

Like many others I have blocked ZEEK’s emails.

Many others? Let’s see the numbers, you tired old fart! Probably not even close to ten percent.

If you keep posting responses to his trolls I will have no choice but to block you too.

You will have no choice, huh? Is someone holding a gun to your head? Honestly, you’d be doing a favor for every person you block…they’d no longer have to DEAL with your dumb replies.

I don’t want to see his crap in any form.

Easy peasy, just take that spoon out of my toilet…go find free meals elsewhere.

If MCN management had any cojones they would ban ZEEK from posting to MCN lists. He’s a waste of time and bandwidth.

You wouldn’t know cojones if they bit you in the keister, you crotchety old pill popper, you. Methinks you need to increase your daily intake of Metamucil and soft boiled slugs. Woo-hoo!


Re: [MCN-Announce]- tSACH’S NAZI GRIFT
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: MCN Announcement list, MCN discussion list
Date: January 18, 2021 2:53 PM

On Sun, 10 Jan 2021 14:17:01 -0800 Terry BOOGALOO Sachs squoinked:

Apparently, zEEK now owns the two previously homeless dogs.

Apparently I do, as it declares in chapter 19 of my Brindlekin tales.

Maybe eventually he’ll start paying for his own pets like millions of others do daily.

Eventually I will, but for awhile longer I can NOT afford to care for them out of my own low income, which is solely Social Security. Believe me, nonetheless a considerable chunk of that income DOES get spent to support my lovely brindlekin. So I’m off to a good start: getting them off the streets, and the accompanying misery of bitter-cold weather, rain, and their owner who was starting to abuse them with increasing force and frequency. They are now VERY happy to share this humble room with me, and, best of all, the building manager loves the doggies, too, and appreciates my courage and fortitude in rescuing them. As, apparently, do most of the residents in my building. I have put my LIFE at risk, in order to accomplish this, you crap-for-brains dingbat!

Once the moolah starts rolling in (and it will) from the rapidly increasing popularity of my tales and videos, I will then be able to drop my GoFundme and Amazon Doggy Wish List projects. But I must say: your attempts to sabotage what I consider to be a SACRED mission, speaks mountains about what an utterly horrid and despicable meat-head you are, Mr. Sack-o-Shit!


Re: [MCN-Announce]- tSACH’S NAZI NIPPLE
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Announce MCN
Date: January 18, 8:19 PM

On Sun, 10 Jan 2021 15:02:35 -0800 Sandi Costerman posted:

What’s your problem, Terry? Keep your hatred to yourself. Find a hobby. Go for a walk. Leave him alone.

Hilarious. If you paid attention to a recent post of mine, I described him and some surly others as my “bodhisattvas” (or “guardian angels”) who willfully play the role as enemy…that I may, in standing up to them, shine brightly as a hero. Mr. Sack-o-Shit is actually a GREAT human being, and we’re just having some fun at each other’s expense. But when I hurl the crap back, he instantly turns it into fertilizer for his garden. That’s a gift not many have…though King Midas came close. Imagine if you could do that yourself: no more having to flush toilets! In fact, I can’t WAIT for his next nasty “I-hate-Zeke” remark, just so I can figure out yet aNOTHER witty bon mot. Bring it on, Mr. Sack-o-Shit!

PS: I also guess it’s his way of drumming up more donations for my doggie rescue project, as another on this list has already contributed $50 to my GoFundMe account, in retaliation for Mr. Sack-o-Shit’s apparent (but not at all real) meanness. Maybe you’ll be next, Sarah? Ha, ha. There’s a method to his madness!

For kindly standing up for my cause, I grant you the loveliest dreams over the next seven nights. Totally G-rated of course: no sex, violence, drugs or rock’n’roll! With or without extra cowbell.


Subject: Did you see tSACH’S “zEEK’S PUPPY GRIFT” posts?
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Tara Roosevelt
Date: January 18, 2021 9:31 PM

Two of them so far, in the announcement list. Hilarious! I already got a donation from another list member, as a result. Mr. Sack-o-Shit’s attacks are backfiring!


Re: [MCN-Announce]- zEEK’S PUPPY GRIFT
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Announce MCN
Date: January 18, 8:32 PM

On Mon, 11 Jan 2021 18:01:04 -0800 R A Ayers squoinked:

I’m with Peter on this one.

Because you’re an asshole, too. Nothing to be proud of, my dear. My words perfectly separate chaff from wheat. Whatever ugly sins you’re hiding from the world, I don’t wanna know. Maybe you should lighten up and watch this funny Youtube video:


Re: [MCN-Announce]- – zEEK’S PUPPY GRIFT
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Announce MCN
Date: January 19, 2021 9:55 PM

On Mon, 11 Jan 2021 19:40:49 -0800 Rocky Hymen squoinked:

Me 2

Rack ’em up, Beelzebub, with your little helper, Terry Sack-o-Shit! Woo-hoo!


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