How You Can Save My Life

September 7, 2015

[ Spacefaring Reader: by “save my life” I mean that my living and financial situation is quite precarious at this point. See my piece, “Obamacare Defecates On The Poor” to understand. Has to do with Medicaid now demanding I pay $518 monthly share of cost on a sparse income of just $1,243; which will (possibly) make me homeless or starving in short shrift. Not to mention going blind because I can no longer afford checkups and treatment for my eyes. In addition, my living arrangement is on the line, due two extreme prejudice against Yours Truly for being a homeless advocate. Which includes having some of my street pals visit my SRO in a large apt. building filled with antagonistic residents. These selfish occupants have nothing better to do than scapegoat me, while enjoying their affluence often provided by coddling mommies and daddies with 6-digit incomes and up.

I recommend that everyone who supports My Noble Mission distribute far and wide, the following visual jokes which originally were posted to Twitter and Facebook. (Please keep in mind that every time you point a person to my achievements–no matter how humble–you make a major strike on behalf of LGBT Rights.) For these catchy memes include my name, and the URL to my site. Which is one of my promotional tactics to get more folks to visit my home page, where they will see the image of my bookcover for “Free Me From This Bond.” Click on that image, and you will be taken to the online version, with links to purchase the book in paperback, hardcover, or ebook. One must be particularly innovative when one is barely a step above dirt-poor, and on the verge of passing on to The Other Realm, thanks to President Obama’s (and the Democratic Party’s) unprecedented betrayal of the poor and disenfranchised.

Necessity is the mother of subliminal advertising.

I certainly encourage you to share my joke memes as often as possible…for in so doing you are saving a life, literally. MINE! To download an image, right-click over it and select “Save picture as”…or equivalent command for whatever browser used. 16 jokes in all; there will be another batch comin’ down the pike in due time: ]

The Curse of Abraham

August 14, 2015

It is beyond my comprehension why so much of my calling reflects a heavily Judeo-Christian metaphor. Except perhaps this is the society I was born and raised in: thus most Americans will not grasp my intent unless it is cloaked in such Biblical ideology. My take on the matter is like so:

According to Carl Jung (the father of compassionate therapy, and great advocate of respecting the folklore intrinsic to whatever culture), the major symbols of any nation are based on the religious mythos most common among its masses.

Therefore, the major archetypes of These Disunited States are based upon Christian icons. It is therefore less likely that the majority of its denizens would comprehend my message, were it based on, say, Buddhist, Native American, Celtic or other non-current belief system that has been usurped by our present mythology which holds a firm grip on its citizenry.

Ergo, in order to reach as many souls as possible within my own nation of birth and education, I must appeal to them via whatever mindset most agrees with their concretized brains.

Though for myself (as a shamanic animist by virtue of long-term examination of life’s truths) I boldly resent having to reach out to the populace via a highly ignorant and destructive world view that has decimated and persecuted many vulnerable populations across the world.

For Christianity is nothing more than a usurpation of previous, and earlier, ethnographic belief systems…which they then claim as originating from their own (so-called) Supreme Divine Command. For example: this “Golden Rule” they claim to originate from a person who never really existed (Jesus Christ) holds no precedent to earlier history. Yet this is patently untrue.

For there have existed many sage women and men–centuries and even millennia before The Christian Era–who’ve taught their people that to “love one another as one would love oneself” is the most basic rule of human life.

[ Scopulous Reader: another example is the concept of “End Times,” which many Christian sects believe will be a prolonged devastation of our planet, of Boschian proportion. This is utter horse hockey, a distortion of the much older, Celtic/Pagan version of transition into a new and glorious Age of Man…which we call the “War of the Wizards.” A tremendous struggle between the evil sorcerors, and the good sorcerers, a.k.a. “Black Hats vs. White Hats.” And just who goes by those titles, in this present era? The White Hats shall win, of course, but the climb to victory will be most extraordinary…and hilarious. To read my particular take on how this shall come about, read my cyberpunk tale, “The Mighty Mouse Virus.” As well as the final part of the last chapter in “Free Me From This Bond (the sequel).” Jump to phrase “letter to the editor” and you’re good. ]

Yet I really have no other choice than to inform the world through a Christian perspective, no matter how much I rebel against it. For changing the hearts of as many people as possible–to love their LGBT brothers and sisters unconditionally–is far more important than being a stickler for historical accuracy.

For the kindly soul who hath declared “let he who is without sin cast the first stone,” has long since evaporated into dust, leaving Yours Truly to pick up the pieces. This is no walk in the park.

I therefore compare my relationship with Larkin, as comparable to that of Abraham and Isaac of the Old Testament. For YHVH commanded that Abraham sacrifice his son, Isaac, to the knife…in order to prove his devotion to The Creator. You may learn about this dramatic stand-off by reading “The Binding of Isaac“.

For it has grown quite clear in my perception, that Our Creator has placed me in a tragic scenario, whereby I must be willing to sacrifice unto death, He Whom I Love Above Any Other, in order to prove my devotion to Homophile Liberation. Thankfully–because I understand the process through shamanic lore–I fully realize that Goddess shall halt this sacrifice at the very last moment…just as Jehovah did with Abraham.

And I believe that Larkin is totally aware of my painful dilemma. For he is such a Benevolent Spirit that he is more than willing to sacrifice His Own Beautiful Life, that I may gain a victorious destiny that will benefit all planetary souls. And he shall never flinch, even for a moment, to bring this about. Just another reason to adore him more than any other man I have ever met (even in my dreams).

And this is why Larkin fuks with me over and over again: for that is the only way I will rise above whatever adversity: by placing the Buddha’s compassion before every challenge that confronts me. In order to discover the joyful solution, rather than one that is vengeful and rife with anger.

You should be so lucky to have someone who loves you so much as Larkin does yours truly, who puts his affection immediately behind life’s sacred lessons (albeit sometimes tragic), without any hesitation whatsoever.

So what is my point here? I guess to demonstrate Larkin’s exquisite sense of Spiritual Martial Arts, and his devoted role in accelerating My Soul’s Progress, unencumbered by romantic attachment.

In spite of my wishes otherwise!

The following postcard I sent out to those 5 proverbial Castro gay bars that Larkin hangs out in–or used to hang out in before I blasted him–on August 11th. Whether he actually can frequent any of them any more, or not, is irrelevant in This Activist Gay Dude’s World. For I am Fate’s Hand That Cannot Be Halted At This Point.

Allow me to close this piece with a cute Twitter post:


Date: Fri, 14 Aug 2015 22:22:03
From: Sean H.
Re: The Curse of Abraham
To: Zeke Krahlin

Abraham is cursed. If I have this right, there was Isaac and Ishmael. To favor Isaac over Ishmael was unfair and ungodly; you never favor one child over the other. Islam, as I understand, is the legacy of Ishmael. For the organized church of so-called Christians to go after Islam is simply pot meeting kettle.


Date: Sat, 15 Aug 2015 12:00:15
Re: The Curse of Abraham
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Sean H.

On Fri, Aug 14, 2015 at 10:22 PM, Sean H. wrote:

{{ Abraham is cursed. If I have this right, there was Isaac and Ishmael. }}

That is one excellent analysis…makes sense even though my conscious intent was not that Abraham himself was cursed. But that all his descendents are cursed. To put this another way: these 3 Abrahamic religions are a curse on all of us; and most particularly on LGBT’s!

Thus, any religion or other world view /must/ come to fully respect
sexual minorities , or their ways shall perish. That is The Ultimate
Litmus Test by which Universal Mind shall judge our world, as far as I
can tell. Seems to me that a sliver of Christian churches will come
through unscathed; same for the other two branches.

The asking of God that one sacrifice who one loves most–to achieve a
greater purpose–arose from ancient shamanic ritual. And it manifested
in a variety of ways…each way giving birth to a major Odyssey within
their folklore.

For each of the Abrahamic religions to claim such brilliant tales as
originating from /themselves/ (instead of earlier sources), is a gross
distortion of Truth…and thus, blasphemy.

Anywayz, I thoroughly enjoyed writing that essay, and I’m glad you got something out of it. Imagine my visiting your church group one Sunday, to read to them “The Curse of Abraham!” Think they’d crucify me…or just stick a few spears in my side?

– Zeke

Blue Roses Blossom

August 8, 2015

Date: Wed, 5 Aug 2015 11:31:55
Blue Roses Blossom
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Eleanor Cooney


Larkin was trying to bump me off via 3rd party, or at least get me
badly beaten. This is the scenario he created the day he shoved me in January 2013, almost slamming me to the concrete. Telling bartenders and patrons alike that I’m psycho, and his stalker. But what I believe is really going on, is that a secret organization within the SF Gay Community (the Blue Rose Militia) is creating a great adventure, in which I play hero. In other words: they are all in on This Astounding Prank.

And it is up to me to figure all this out by piecing together the jigsaw puzzle which parts are scattered across more than eight years of struggle, defeat, broken hearts, insight, and sometimes victory. I discussed this with Hollywood, and offered a copy of my “Elephant Man” postcard, to hand over to Larkin. Though I do take the Buddha’s tenet “we have no enemies, only teachers” to heart.

My loyal soldiers will see to it that I come to no harm, nor does Larkin. But some intense scenarios have certainly been of the “close call” type. Though it seems at this point, the scary parts of my role have come to an end. I shall not perish; in fact I will flourish, with vision restored to 20/20, my teeth repaired, and so forth. They will bring me so many delectable males, I will most likely swoon into their arms every time a new one is presented me. Ejaculation never had it so good!

Since Larkin’s attempt to wipe me out reflects upon the SF Gay Family at large, the militia must bust their balls in order to establish my path to victory. I explained to Barbara of CVS, the brilliance of his script. For My Benevolent Brontosaur is the mastermind behind it all. I am Larkin’s hero, as he is mine. This astounding dilemma that he manifested, gave me the extraordinary opportunity to prove my courage and devotion.

Remember my “Thracian courtship” description in that piece, “Hilarious Respite?” How in ancient times in that corner of the world, courtship between two male warriors involved attempts to destroy each other. If their partnership was blessed by Zeus, no harm would come to either, no matter how violent the actions. This macho courtship would last for several months or a little more…but in rare cases, much longer. For my particular destiny, the destructive overtures have been going on for an extraordinarily long cycle: more than 2-1/2 years to date, and still persisting! But there is a pot of gold at the end of this rainbow: for the more prolonged the courtship the more rewarding the marriage.

Though honestly, El (I have to admit) I am as exhausted by now, as Sisyphus after a thousand years of grunting.

I should also mention that I’ve taken a lot of flack for posting my “Obamacare Defecates” manifesto on Facebook and Twitter! Most folks are too brainwashed that the ACA is a blessing on the poor; they accuse me of being a right-wing infiltrator. For instance (from a discussion on Daily Kos; and this a mild form of vitriol relative to /other/ hateful responses I’ve received):

* [new] Millions will die… (1+ / 0-)

Don’t be such a drama queen. Millions will not die due to ACA. If you so loath everything you listed, get the hell out of the US to another country where no one will give one shit about your situation. Anyone with the small bit of intelligence required to read, can have Obama care and thrive on it for a small premium. We can’t fix stupid. Possibly you are expending all of your energy and brain cells on hysteria so you don’t get it?

by leonine46 on Mon Jul 13, 2015 at 08:40:52 PM PDT

Harvey Milquetoast Was No Ally To The Gay Cause

The chief reason I despise Harvey Milk, is this: he repressed me from participating in the gay activist movement here in San Francisco. Thus setting back our liberation by almost thirty years. Other reasons I dislike the idiot are discussed in essays I wrote years ago, but care not to bring up right now. And by extension, other noted LGBT activists have perpetrated this unholy jihad against me…and Goddess only knows how many /others/ whose contributions /could/ have won our freedom at least two generations sooner! All because Mr. Milquetoast rejected his liberal base and kissed up to powerful conservative factions, especially the Irish Catholic.

And who assassinated Him? Dan White, an Irish Catholic! The dark side of Harvey has been swept under the carpet by the Queer Elite; they even made him a saint.

In completing this email, I want to end with a magnanimous THANK YOU ELEANOR for being such an amazing ally and sounding board for This Queer Straggler. Without you, none of these astounding events would have taken place in my life…and by consequence, LGBT rights would never blossom into This World’s Liberation, as shall soon occur. Who says hetero folks can’t be staunch supporters of Gay Rights? Bring them to me, and I shall smash them into the ground. Somewhere in Iowa.

All my love and more,


PS: As it turned out, on Happy Whatever Day (July 25th) I wound up dropping off the booklet “Scooby-Doo and the Vampire’s Revenge” in the gated doorway of an apartment building on a side street by the local library. In good faith it will find its way into Larkin’s hands, as that is the residence of a miniature poodle that My Goofy Godzilla walks daily.


[ Cantankerous Reader: the title “New Rules” is based on Bill Maher’s Real Time segment by the same name. While most impressed by his confrontational stance against right-wing dogma, I was put off one night while watching an episode where a guest turned from his chair to give Bill a hug. To which Mr. Maher pushed him away and stated: “Don’t touch me, faggot.” I guess he thought that was funny.

This faux progressive has from time to time, expressed support for LGBT Equality, yet numerous times he has denigrated The Cause by declaring it over the top. Ergo, I conclude that this celebrity is not a true ally of Our Struggle. For this reason alone, I refuse to watch any more of his shows. Nonetheless, I find it most gratifying to steal his thunder by claiming “New Rules” for my own. ]

Mailed to 5 gay bars in The Castro (and Larkin), July 17th:

Date: Wed, 22 Jul 2015 15:44:32
Very Close to the Home Stretch!
From: Zeke Krahlin
To: Carlyle Lambourne

Revolution is /just/ around the corner, as you can clearly discern from current news events. This one’s a real sizzler:

NATO Commander Wesley Clark calls for internment camps ‘to deal with radicals’ in the US and Europe

And that is why I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Larkin shall
assign a branch of my Blue Rose Militia to see to my safety, protection, and places to go into hiding (while also possessing a gorgeous environment with equally gorgeous Thracians).

– Ezekiel

Mailed to 5 gay bars in The Castro (and Larkin), July 20th:

Larkin, My Friend

December 15, 2014

11 December 2014

Larkin, My Friend:

You’re looking rather dumpy and haggard in your old age. I don’t think you’ll be able to hustle much longer…I’d give you six more months at the most. Especially with the rotten condition of your teeth. But you shall always remain a wonderful and beautiful man to me, no matter how fat and homely you become.

So please do not despair. If you ever feel so downtrodden and lost on life, please don’t consider ending it. Please come to me; I will always love you no matter what. You have a true friend in me, more than (I’m sure) Zachary or anyone else.

I’ve been through this with Randolph, who wound up dead or disappeared, instead of contacting me. The last time I’ve heard from him was way back in 1992.

I’ve been treated like shit since the day I was born, starting with a cold family life which I was more than happy to run away from once I turned 17. Rare moments they have been, that I have known sweet friendship, and sometimes even lovers. Otherwise, people treat me like crap, including here in the Castro…which I’m sure you have witnessed.

You are the only person in my life who has shown great compassion, albeit sporadic. You’ve even hugged me numerous times, and put hope and joy in my heart over many encounters. And those moments have been so glorious, they give me great motivation to keep reaching out to you. In spite of your recent maliciousness, which I can’t help but believe are tribulations you’ve imparted, that I grow stronger and wiser.

For the Buddha hath said, “We have no enemies, only teachers.” And of course, Jesus’ wise proclamation: “Love your enemy.”

My love for you is sincere, and I am greatly concerned for your well being in the long run. Please know that it gives me great honor and pride, to be here for you no matter what. Do not ever think your life is over, because of some changes or downturns that may put you in crisis.

My life is hell without you, so I think it’s time you find it in your heart to renew our friendship. And I promise:

I will make you really happy forever, and always be the most loyal friend you’ll ever know.

All my love,

Zeke (a.k.a. Eugene)

P.S.: As long you need to hustle to survive, we can work together…such that I’ll be an asset who’ll greatly increase your customer base. I can even be a good friend to Zachary, if that will help.

Holiday Soldier Spirit

December 4, 2010

I am glad to suddenly have possession of some excess money (parents inheritance), in order to donate to certain causes. So far, I’ve received $2,900 from Dad’s refund of car insurance, fireman’s retirement, etc. My brother is collecting on all these loose ends, giving me 50% of whatever he gets. This is not part of the trust fund set up for me…which will not start for a while yet, maybe as long as three years from now. Trust fund should get me anywhere between $5,000-35,000…we just have to see. This includes the sale of their mobile home in FL, which will take at least a couple years to process (in light of this horrid economy).

So the money will not even be enough to repair my mouth, and get a set of dentures…considering how expensive it is in this country. Therefore, I feel good about donating some of it to worthwhile causes (which in my case are mostly gay causes). Two days ago, my favorite talk show host, Karel (the only gay one on the airwaves, who is doing a fantastic job) has announced he is in need of financial support to keep his show rolling…so he set up a “Karel Klub”, rather than start charging for his podcasts. You can donate $25 or more, per year. So I donated that amount…and will donate more later on, via his online store. See:

You can listen to him live BTW, Mon-Fri 3-6pm PST at:

Karel’s a hoot and a holler; you’ll relish every moment of his show. Plus, you’ll get to see the world through queer eyes, to boot! (Don’t think for a moment that–in spiteof his success–he doesn’t put his life at risk each and every day, in our tragically homophobic culture, by being such an openly gay, radio celebrity. Send this dude some love and gratitude, to counter all the email and cell phone hatred.)

This morning I donated $25 to Wikileaks, in order to support the very brave whistle blower, Julian Assange:

Notice this is a new URL, as gov’t and corporate pressure (via US, Sweden, France, Australia et al) is forcing closure of Wikileaks’ original site, as well as any other alternate sites that pop up. I plan to donate another $25 or so, later this month.

And tonight, I just donated $50 in cash, plus another $50 purchase of a “Courage to Resist” hoodie, to support Bradley Manning (another Wikeleaks activist BTW). He is the gay soldier who exposed the deceit of our war in Afghanistan…and may have to serve as much as 35 years in prison, for his courageous act. See:

It’s rare that I ever have enough money to donate to causes I believe in. This time around, I do. And it feels wonderful. I believe my Randolph’s spirit is behind this (his upcoming birthday is smack dab in the middle of the holiday season: December 30).

So, happiest holidays to all true liberals and pro-gay patriots!

Sinqueerly yours,

Ezekiel J. Krahlin (Jehovah’s Queer Witness)

Picture of the hoodie

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